It is also good to get to the point where you cook dinner for each other before going out.
Ability o cook and not just microwave frozen things is an asset.

Whether to split the bill is determined by who does the inviting and what understanding was reached before the fact. If everyone/the other person just shows up, there's a potential problem. Generally, body language in such a situation is a good indicator as to expectations about who should pay.

A long time ago, when I was dating, I insisted on paying my own way. As Holiday wrote, that kept expectations reasonable, and it seemed fairer since money was often tight for everyone in my dating pool.

I often got resistance to going Dutch if I was dating a man since back then (my dating days were some 40 years ago) it was considered unmanly for him not to pick up the check. Got into some frustrating arguments about it, even if I offered to give him my share before we got to the restaurant so it would look like he was paying for everything.

I haven't dated in decades, I hate to think this is still such a big issue.

Relax until either he mentions it or when the waitress asks. State ‘separate checks’ to the waitress, or say, “Thanks, but I prefer dutch.”

It’s weird and a red flag for anyone to press further, as though you’re unable to make up your own mind. It is a nice gesture, but I’m with you. A dude paying just because he’s a dude sets up a dominant/submissive hierarchy in the relationship off the bat.

Ha!
No. We've the same credit card.

This is such a nice civil group. LOL Seriously, I mean that.

I always pay for the first date. Usually after that it's separate checks or one person pays and the other provides the tip. For things like birthdays or other celebratory outings, I'll just pick it up.

If a man asks me on a first date, he pays. He gets the pleasure of my company, and I'm interrupting my busy life and taking the risk to meet him. If a man were to try to make me pay that would be our last date.

If I were the one to ask a woman on a date, then I would expect to pay.

I feel that if women want to have respect and independence in every aspect of their lives, it becomes hypocritical to expect a man to pick up the bill just because he’s a man.... no excuses. I’m very independent and cherish that independence, therefore I will not let a guy pick up the check. If it’s something special, then that’s different. But at the same time I will pick up the check for his birthday.

Absolutely not if it is a date. If it is on outing that falls into the grey area I go along with however she wants to do it. I offer, but don’t argue. I’d say relative incomes also factor in.

Whoever asked for the date should be prepared to pay for it.

Yes if she makes as much money as I do. Or we treat each other every other time.

I think that whoever is doing the asking out should pay the bill. If a guy asks a girl out, he should pay. If a girl asks a guy out, she should pay. I figure if you're asking someone out, you're offering to treat them in exchange for their company. So if you're treating, you must pay.

On a first date I tell my date that I would like to pay the bill if she doesn't mind. If she prefers to split, I say " whatever you'd like". If she agrees but somehow demonstrates, or says, that doesn't seem fair to her, I suggest that she could get the next time, even if there is question as to whether or not there will be a next time. After that I prefer to alternate but take into account if I have more availability resources. Doesn't have to be exactly 50/50. Have had many that never "make the reach" for their purse even on 3rd or 4th date. What are they thinking this day and age?

I am a bit old fashioned in this bit. I prefer to pay.

I try to read each situation. I typically offer to pay on a 1st date and then go from there.

i think all my first days being a old fashion gentlemen i have paid enjoyed the company not that i have that many dates

I have. If a movie, one of us might pay for tix, and the other a large popcorn and soda or some scenario like that. I like cooking and would invite whomever I was dating over to eat regularly. They'd bring a couple things if I was providing the main course. Nothing wrong with potlucking it.

Yes, always. Now that I'm married and we share all accounts, whoever has the wallet closest pays lol

Depends on the date.

If the topic does not come up, I pay. I grew up where manners were stressed. If the woman offers, then it will depend upon the conversation we have had.

Sometimes

I always feel embarrassed when a woman offers to pay, even when it's only half the bill. If it is a person I know well, then we may agree to do so sometimes, but I'm still inclined to say I insist on paying for the wine.
I don't expect anything in return, other than, perhaps, a friendly good night kiss on the cheek.

First date, yes. Second date, probably not. Once "dating." Take it as it comes, sometimes yes, sometimes I pay, sometimes, she does. Keep it "even Stevens," when possible without worrying about too much.

I’m a millennial but reading this makes me feel super old-fashioned. My husband always paid for everything when we were dating. It never occurred to me to pay for anything on our dates. I just thought that’s what men do.