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This is what women have to put up with and then they want to be intimate while we are still angry because they will not do their share of housework.

Jolanta 8 Mar 11
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11 comments

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1

I like cleaning up, washing dishes is necessary.

I am glad to hear it.

Good on you! Take your turn at the cooking, too, why don’t ya?! And the vacuuming, and the laundry, and...

0

I dunno.. after having an argument over household chores (or anything) "intimacy" is not at the top of the list of things to do next. Makeup sex worked for the first 5 or so years.. after that she more or less just stayed angry for the next 10.. didn't matter that I did my share of dishes, vacuuming, cooking, laundry, home renos, car repair, yard work.. (those last 3 she did none of).. etc.

Davekp Level 8 Mar 12, 2021
2

I am now alone. My second wife had health issues, so I did everything inside and out. In my first marriage I did the ironing, simply because I was particular about the amount of starch and getting the pleats perfect in my many many cotton dress shirts. I cooked then too, my wife baked. She was a really good cook, with Amish roots. I never really had a problem pitching in with housework at all. I distinctly remember in my first marriage doing the handyman thing or cooking a special meal would usually result in my being led to the bedroom later on.

4

Look, when I say I'll do it, I'll do it. You don't need to remind me every six months.

skado Level 9 Mar 11, 2021

No sex for you for six months.

@Jolanta
Does that mean none for you too? 😀

So... So... Soooooo male.

@MsKathleen
Hopefully.

3

My ex got out of lots of "family" chores by studied inefficiency and ineptness. When we met he was a good cook, after we had kids he would cook only one thing, and it was horrible. Washing up was half assed, and frequently things broke. He could be counted on not to break kids and to get them in bed at a reasonable time. After we split the kids confirmed he only did what was absolutely necessary in the realm of housework. He liked to pour a glass of OJ and take it up the stairs and down the hall to his study, and the kiddoes confirmed there were OJ stains in the carpet all along that path. He did repair chores around the house, but it was guaranteed to be at least two trips to the hardware store, and hours of fussing, discussing, and whining. He did do the lawn mowing and snow removal. Fixing cars was done by the dealer or other repair/maintenance place.

So the good cook part was just bait to hook you. I would not be surprised if this is a common move among men. My late partner did something similar but in reverse. When her son was a teen he asked her to wash his clothes so she put colored with whites and his T-shirts came out pink. He started washing them himself.
Since I left home at 19 I have been totally on my own for 18+ years. All those things I had to learn myself (the military taught me the importance of neatness and how to sew). Having a maid for a partner would be a nightmare for me.

@JackPedigo I don't let anyone else do my laundry, I'm weird that way. I hang things up as soon as they come out of the dryer. I hate ironing. My jeans don't go in the dryer. I just like doing things my way. I'd rather do laundry than vacuum. I have a Robovac, so it works well.

@JackPedigo The red in with whites was a situation used in the TV series Frasier. Daphne the live in health aide found someone had moved her laundry in the community laundry room, so she put a pair of red undies in that washer load. The last scene of that episode was a neighbor dressed for tennis in a very pink shirt.

@HippieChick58 All those things I have always done. I even did the ironing (including the bed sheets) and my late partner would feel guilty when doing her blouses and do those herself. She announced from day 1 she would not do windows. I got a squeegee kit and do those myself. However, I do expect a partner to share her strengths. Housework should be a joint endeavor.

@JackPedigo I am a quilter and sewer, so I do lots of ironing. However, completed clothing is a PITA to iron. I'd rather pass when I can, I have very few items in my wardrobe that need to be pressed, and I never do sheets. I live alone, so anything that gets done is mostly done by me, except for the yard work. I have a mowing team that comes during the growing season. My yard has a killer slope. And some things my kids don't want to me to do, some things my son in law helps with, he cleans my gutters when needed. I'm actually pretty impressed with myself about the number of things I've managed to do by myself.

@HippieChick58 I too live alone (for now) but being here one/I have to have a sense of self-sufficiency. Water and septic are both controlled by me and with just over an acre (1/3 is lawn) I have to do all the outside work. Still, it seems you manage quite well. It does get harder as we advance through the different 'stages of life.'

🤗 let it go...

@MsKathleen that is always good advice..

1

My question is this: if men are supposed to wash dishes, why can't we have a sink that's not down between our waist and our knees? Sinks should adjustable height.

I do my own dishes, and it's a literal pain in the back.

BitFlipper Level 8 Mar 11, 2021

You must be taller than average. The problem is most kitchens are built for "average" people. I'm not average height, I don't know many who really are. I'm considering a stool in the kitchen, except I'd likely trip over it and break my neck. As for washing dishes, I fully believe that is what a dishwasher is for. I prefer not to hand wash, and only hand wash a very few things that cannot go in the dishwasher, and then only use those items or wash those items reluctantly.

4

Living alone ,I have that argument with my self all the time but in the end I do get stuck with doing it all 🙂

RoyMillar Level 9 Mar 11, 2021

Do you also withhold sex because you are mad about who did the washing up? haha

@Mermaidfantasy good one ,would prefer a bit of kinky sex while doing the dishes with some one lol

3

Since I am my wife's primary carer, house work is my domain (no pun intended)

Pretty much in the same boat though cooking is about 40-20-40. Me -us -her

7

Personally I don't mind doing the dishes. Specially if the woman cooked

Unity Level 7 Mar 11, 2021
3

Have to?

skado Level 9 Mar 11, 2021

Yes, so far.

@Jolanta
By what, outside yourself, are you forced to do such a thing, if I may inquire?

2

In my opinion, it occurs in between the mutual agreement 😅

Ideally...

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