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Is One really the loneliest number?

Justjoni 8 Apr 2
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Could be, but not necessarily

polekeep Level 4 Apr 10, 2019

If you like and love yourself, which if healthy you should, it is the least lonely. When I am by myself I am not alone.


I enjoy my own company, and that of my cats. I was far, far lonelier when I was married and playing second fiddle to ex's hobby. I think everyone needs to spend some time all by themselves to figure out who they really are.


I don't think so. I think it's worst when you're involved with someone and they make you feel alone.

Kittencpa Level 5 Apr 2, 2019

I feel the same. It hurts more, because your expectations are for greater intimacy



I'm lonely a lot of the time, but I also appreciate my aloneness. My score was a 5, but I was being pretty stern with myself about those judgments.

mischl Level 8 Apr 2, 2019

Very good article, thanks so much for sharing it. I'm going to bookmark it... I've grappled with loneliness on and off since my 20's, and there are a couple of things I've come to understand about it for me.

First, loneliness is really about lack of connection -- to myself, and to others. If there are people I don't feel connected with, I have to ask myself, is it because of them or because of me? Chances are years ago it was more of both -- I didn't feel a connection to myself, so even if I was with really good people I couldn't recognize it, but I also didn't know the difference, so I would gravitate to anyone who showed me attention, yet I still felt lonely. These days I can be way more discerning that I can be with people and not feel connected and know that they're just not the right people for me, and more often than not I'd rather be alone than be lonely when I'm with others.

Another thing I've come to understand is that loneliness is part of the human condition. It's an awareness of our separateness as well as a desire to connect with people who really see us.

bleurowz Level 8 Apr 2, 2019

Memories of the song by Three Dog Night;

One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
Two can be as bad as one...
It's the loneliest number since the number one...

No is the saddest experience you'll ever know...
Yes, it's the saddest experience you'll ever know...

'Cause one is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
One is the loneliest number, whoa-oh, worse than two...

It's just no good anymore since you went away
Now I spend my time just making rhymes of yesterday...


I'm rarely lonely anymore, I also have a strong support network around the country and specifically in Utah.

Several years of my marriage was extremely lonely though.

Plus, I have a German Shepherd Dog who doesn't let me go potty alone

My dog gets so happy to have me in full petting mode while I’m on the potty . So silly!


If you have any form of depression it certainly can be ,but then again you are with the most intelligent person you know ,so your answers should come from with in

RoyMillar Level 9 Apr 2, 2019

Can be depends on the person not for everyone

bobwjr Level 9 Apr 2, 2019

A perfect 6 for me and yet I feel fine

Tooreen Level 7 Apr 2, 2019

Living as a gypsy now, I experience social loneliness, which I just call solitude and generally enjoy. But emotional loneliness is way worse when there’s actually someone physically near but worlds apart.

Justjoni Level 8 Apr 2, 2019

right on, Joni.


interesting. you can be lonely in a crowd. i know.


Not really - I've had people tell me that they have felt "lonely" even when surrounded by people that are friends or relatives, etc ....

Lavergne Level 8 Apr 2, 2019

Did you read the article linked?

@Justjoni yes - was interesting. One thing they didn't address is the fact that it seems to be possible (IMHO) to move thru those phases over time - kind of like "cycle thru"? Maybe some of them - maybe all of them at one point or another? Depending on life circumstances, etc etc.....

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