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Should one bring/send flowers on a first date? Not a coffee. A real date. Dinner and a show, or lunch and a ballgame.

Donwhy 6 Sep 16
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44 comments

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1

I never messed with flowers on a first date and have done alright.

6

Bring babies. If she's a proper heathen, she'll know just how to cook them.

5

I think it's sweet, and it keeps you on her mind with a smile when she sees the flowers in her home for the rest of the week. If you have the idea to do it, then do. Even a $5 bouquet from Safeway adds a splash of color. If she's allergic, perhaps she can keep them out on her patio.

5

Well, I wouldn't be displeased, but you do risk that the lady is allergic to flowers. Then there is the issue of where to put the flowers if you do something else after dinner.

5

It's a lovely gesture. If the impulse is genuine, do it.
Just keep it simple, and make sure she can put them in a vase before
you head out. No one wants to tote around flowers for the duration.

5

I vote "no", if for no other reason than one of you then have to carry them around. If you want to give flowers, send them the next day.

5

I’ve only had that happen once in my life. It was so surprising and amazing! I loved it....doesn’t have to be an expensive bouquet. He brought pretty wildflowers. Still makes me smile even though we didn’t work out

4

Sure! It's a lovely gesture. Yes it's old fashioned and rarely done these days. That makes you unique. Allergies? I suffer through the allergies

4

Lunch and a ball game, the beers would be my flowers! Anyway a ball game would be fun, you can actually talk with one another in a relaxed atmosphere, low key and laid back

4

Someone brought me a bunch of ripe wheat once...it was beautiful and I was impressed!

3

It’s a very sweet gesture but at the same time it would be hard for me too to carry them around the entire time. Instead you can send them to her workplace with a hand-written note (seriously, skip the ready written fake notes) and it’ll mean a lot.

Guys have no idea how small but thoughtful things mean a lot to us.

3

I don't want to receive anything on a first date . If we don't know ea other enough , giving me anything will make me uncomftable and what's the point ?
Also for me , a coffee time is a real date . A show , a movie , a game will never do for me . Not as first date at least , maybe two months later . I want to hear u talk , not the actors / athletes / whatever .

3

It really depends on what kind of people you two are and where you are going on the date.

  • If you like bringing flowers on the first date; if that's your thing, then go ahead. But be considerate of your date and the place of the date.
  • Your date might not like the flowers (could be allergic or have a specific flower he/she likes); do research before buying your date flowers.
  • Don't bring flowers to a date where you or your date can't set the flowers aside; you don't want someone holding a bouquet of flowers the entire time, do you?
3

I would say that's your call but it would be better than a set of wiper blades

@Omen6Actual I use Rain-X

3

I have gotten a good response from a single rose on the first date. Classy but not overdone. Really though it depends on the person, use your best judgment.

3

A resounding no! I think you shouldn't act overly chivalrous on the first date. Women say they like it and that it's "sweet", but they secretly hate it (trust me on this), and later use your sweet behavior as a weapon against you ("but you weren't always like that" ). A reasonable combination of courtesy and genuineness should work out fine for you. Just be yourself and don't be afraid to show the masculine side of you.

Wrong. I think a gentleman should be a gentleman and not show up empty handed.

@SkotlandSkye
Yeah? And what should "ladies" bring to the table? I should not show up empty-handed just because the other person has a vagina between her legs? I thought we were all equal.

@Darius77 I generally give books on the first date....but I also prefer to COOK and stay home to have a conversation. Therefore, I am providing food and professional skill. Thanks for showing you are a TYPICAL man who goes straight to sex. You do know that women have brains too, right? And, seriously dude, do something about that chip on your shoulder. It makes you look ugly.

@SkotlandSkye
Thank YOU for playing the victim card. I have NO problem giving my date a gift as long as I know there is reciprocity. But if someone EXPECTS me to automatically bring something to the table just because she happens to be the one with the vagina, then I have a huge problem. This is the exact opposite of going straight to sex! It shows I'm not willing to get laid through any means.

@SkotlandSkye
And just because I express opinions that you don't approve of doesn't mean I have any chip on my shoulder. I get along fantastically with women. I'm just not willing to bend over backwards to please them. That's against my dignity. You are free to interpret it however you wish to.

@Darius77 hahahahahaha YOU were the one "playing victim"
Oh, poor me...it's good manners to bring a gift and I don't want to because why should I just because she's a women....men are sooooooooooo taken advantage of......

ugh. Men like you are gross. I'll be blocking you now for being an asshat.

@SkotlandSkye
Class act by deleting all your comments!!

3

I personally feel it's a little over-the-top. Also, they are a little inconvenient to deal with during the date. I would save that sort of thing for after it has progressed to the next stage and you have become an item. But that's just me.

3

not if she has cats or allergies. find out if she even LIKES flowers! likewise a bottle of wine -- she may not drink (or she might love it). try to find out what she likes before you decide.

g

3

I had my first date in a really long time a few weeks ago. He brought me flowers, which was sweet, but awkward because I had to carry them around since we met at the restaurant. I echo no if you aren't meeting at one's house before the date.

3

why not i think any thoughtful gesture should be viewed for what it is flowers chocs beer wine beer whisky beer rum really anything

3

This seems to me a bit old fashioned however, given the age of your date this may be appropriate. I do think that if you get on well and decide to continue to date each other that you could do this on the 3rd or 4th date to show that you are really into them.

2

In my mind, I would love getting flowers on a first date, after the date had happened, and only if in picking the flowers they showed that they paid attention to my story about my favorite flower - the Zinnia. I'm picky, but I've also never had a woman try to buy me flowers, so your mileage may vary.

2

LOL "not coffee. A real date" Real date? heh

Right? There are no real dates only coffee and Netflix and chill.

2

Not if she is a hay fever sufferer

2

If the need to bring something on a real first date is strong than flowers would do.
But I feel on a very first date it's too much pressure.
I have been known to ask, when my date wants to pay for EVERYthing and not take my half of the cost, "Will you be expecting sex at the end of this date?".
I am up front and not afraid to set my boundaries.

I would never "expect sex". Would rejoice at sex, but I have no expectations for any date.

2

I don’t by flowers for anyone anymore, twice in my life I had woman break up with me the day I a got them flowers... I’ll by you dinner, I’ll cook, pay for drinks, hell, I even braught a girl a ukulele, if we are together what’s mine is yours but if you want flowers you will have to buy them yourself.

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