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36 5

how do you define success?
is it all about money or peace of mind.
my brother is really rich he has 10 rental properties, at 60 years old he's working full-time as an engineer.
and everytime I see him he's so stressed out that I can barely stand to visit with him.
it's like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.
I on the other hand,I retired at 55 I live in a 2000 square foot house which is paid for.
I still work for 4 hours a day driving left. other than that I don't work at all.
all my needs are pretty much taken care of have I been successful?

m16566 7 May 15
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36 comments

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4

You are successful as long as you have shelter on your head and food on your table, being super wealthy does not make you happy and a successful individual, if your brother have had done his responsibly of human being he would not have 10 rental properties, the real successful human being is the one who share his apple with the one who does not have an apple. it is life and no one take his wealth with him when he die, we as human should share what we have and resources with one and other so that the world will be a better place for everyone to live.

NR92 Level 6 May 16, 2019
4

Love, happiness, and peace of mind -- that's what I want. I'm not rich but I have money. It's a useful tool but that's it.

4

Money is only a means. For me, real happiness is my creative life. I worked at jobs I hated for years because my father convinced me I couldn't make it as an artist. When he died, I realized life is too short to work at a job I hated so I could create. I figured out how to make money doing what I love. I don't make as much money but I'm much happier.

3

If what you are doing works for you, then you have been successful. I actually feel sorry for your brother because life is too short to be stressed at that level...all the time.

3

Dude, you're still comparing yourself to your brother. Sounds to me like you have a ways to go. It'd be nice if you could take pride in your brother's accomplishments without feeling that his successes lessen your own accomplishments.

3

I say we need to stop measuring success in the ways capitalism would have us measure it-- based purely on money and assets. Is that all there is to life? For me personally success is related to my education, my employment and if I have helped others and helped make society a better place. Not related to assets or finances at all, even though I have savings and a great credit score. meh

3

My opinion, success is less about financial successes and elevated state of living. More about general satisfaction in life experiences to date and that we are comfortable in our life today.
In this context, I feel much more "successful" than many with much more material possessions than me.

3

are those the only two choices: money or peace of mind? how about accomplishment other than wealth, such as inventing something useful for the world, or fighting for justice, either of which necessarily provides peace of mind? there are a gazilllion ways to define success that do not involve money or peace of mind.

g

ego ambition and pride are all sources of suffering
certainly there are other kinds of success

@m16566 oh, so martin luther king was acting only out of ego or pride? all ambition, regardless of what kind or for what purpose, causes suffering? i do not buy that. you state that as a fact. it isn't a fact.

g

3

It is totally subjective. If you feel you are successful, that is all that matters.

3

Success is a wholly subjective concept.
You're successful if you believe you are.
What anyone else thinks is irrelevant.

Success isn't anything I've ever been concerned with.
Not even a little bit.

2

Success is being happy with your life even if it is working 100 hour weeks at something you love doing. If you hate your life or hate what you do with it you are unsuccessful... You will live a longer and happier life than your brother barring accidents or illness like cancer so who is in fact more successful in your eyes? In his eyes he probably is but he can't take all that to the grave with him can he?....

2

Don’t know that I would recognize success if I achieved it. It’s mostly relative I guess. I would like to die with the least regrets as possible though.

That's as good a measure of success as any I have heard. I always thought of it as, dying knowing that you have done your best to make the world a better place, but it works even better the other way round in the negative, as you put it.

2

Success is being happy.

2

I would say you both have...... We all are wired differently. It's just as simple as you both have different goals. There's no right or wrong here, as I see it

2

Civilization is when we stop asking "When will be the next meal?" and start to ask "Where will we dinner tonight?".

By analogy, success is when you make this transition to most parts of your life, house, sex, love, family, food, entertainment, health etc according to what is important to you.

2

Dude, you win, hands down! I'm in a similar situation with my brother. I don't remember the last time we just sat and shot the shit! He's the most busy person in the world in his own mind. He's had rectal cancer already, probably due to stress and smokes. The last time I went to his house by invitation to have dinner, he worked through the whole time I was there for about 2 hours. We never had any meaningful conversation. He's also a trumpite so that's a source of friction between us as well. I'm ok in my little house.

2

I define success as happiness. Like your brother, I work my butt off and am quite often stressed out. However, I love what I do and have what I need to live.

2

Success is living Happy and Healthy.

2

Sounds like your brother is an eldest sibling. The poor things can’t help themselves. Maybe when he’s older he’ll learn to relax but don’t hold your breath.

Goofing off is a valuable life skill IMO.

2

One of my oft-times quote that I feel sums up success.

“I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.”
― douglas adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul

1

To quote Bob Dylan from an interview somewhere, and here I paraphrase, “Success is waking up in the morning, doing what you want do and then going to sleep when you are ready.”

1

I have less than you do but my "success" is similar to yours. It took lifetime events to put me in this frame I'm in today but I have less stress and that is important. I do not live paycheck to paycheck so I have little worries. In my daily limited job I am around others constantly and deliver auto parts. Privately I avoid most people because being around them and seeing their stress levels makes me want to run away. Life is full of decisions. It does not have to be full of stress.

1

Success = Being happy & contented with what you've got

1

Definitely not your brother. Me thinks he is working himself towards being the richest person in the graveyard.

1

Success is fulfilling a purpose or goal that leads to a feeling of accomplishment or happiness. I guess there are different levels of success though. To some, success is being able to get out of bed every morning. To some it can be a small goal such as taking care of the days chores at home. To some, running their own business that makes a profit is a success. To some, helping others with hunger or their health etc. is a success. Then you have the people who can achieve everything they set out to do and they are not successful or happy because they are chasing something that doesn't make them feel fulfilled. It's like the person who is never happy with the money they make because there is more money to make, or the person who leaves every relationship because they feel they are settling and there is always something better out there for them.

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