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The two biggest challenges that I have encountered in dating are women who smoke and women are too religious.

  1. Cigarette smell is very strong to me and I have actually gotten sick after kissing a girl who smoked. That is why I stopped dating girls who smoke. I threw up, and I get an allergic reaction to smoke inhalation. So this is a health issue for me.
  2. I tried the online dating and when I see god fearing women or looking for a god fearing man, I take a hard pass.
    I would like to hear from both men and women about what are your biggest challenges to dating, and what is a turn off for you. What people will you not date or get in a relationship with.
  • 27 votes
  • 24 votes
  • 1 vote
  • 2 votes
  • 43 votes
  • 5 votes
noworry28 8 Apr 14
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76 comments

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2

I also can't be around smoke. Enough allergies as it is. I don't bother to date anymore. The prevalence of religious fanatics, hard core GOP, the ones only wanting to hop in the sack, and the druggies is not to my preference. I thought that I was being pretty open minded just looking for someone to get to know first, a little intelligence that would work as a team in time. Guess that was to much to ask for.

12

Sadly for me , everything is listed on this poll is deal breaker .
β€œ I will die alone . And merry Xmas β€œ!πŸ˜‚
And that’s ok !

@pralina1 no alcohol? Oh that eliminates a lot of people. Except some Christian's. Oh my.

I doubt that

@Bigwavedave etoh is ok , I drink wine w dinner some x , but anything else is not for me .

11

I am married over 35 years so this does not apply to me, but if it did ,To me too religious, drink ,and cigarettes are about the same.( Not acceptable.)Non religious believer that excepts a nonbeliever is ok and drinking on rare occasions is also ok.My wife is ten years younger with no issues to speak of so this is a non issue .Political ideology is not important unless they did not except mine or were fanatical in theirs .

10

Too religious,too much alcohol, cigarettes ,excessive pot smokers and woman with TDS are a turn off for me .

9

I have nothing against sex, however if the first thing they write is asking me if I can send them nude pics (or telling me what they like sexually), I'm out of there. A close second/third is being a Trump supporter and being too religious.

9

You didn't include TDS. That would be at the top of my list.

Definitely agree with you on that .These fanatics are worse than the religious believers they abhor

They are so annoying, ugh

Trumpers tell me that I have TDS and that is how they explain my feelings about Trump. I see this as exactly the other way around. TDS is when you are a Trump lover. I've never wanted a hat, flag, or T-shirt with a political name on it. That is a derangement syndrome.

@WW11grandpa You won't see them from me. I didn't trade my country for a red hat.

9

Conditions... Conditions! No two people are even similar. We start differently in life, come from different places, are raised differently, believe in different things, our life experiences are different... how can anything be similar? Wrong expectations will lead to relationship failures.

A good heart is way more important than everything else. A relationship is often much simpler than what we make of it. If you have two good minds with kindness, acceptance, tolerance, empathy and a good worldview of things, all will fall in place and the world will look beautiful.

Religion, politics, food, hobbies have nothing to with a good relationship. Two different people be very happy together if you know how to pick the best in each other.

Want more, expect more and get problems more. Start simple, have an open mind and you will get it right.

8

A Trump supporter would be a deal breaker for me. It tells me so much about the woman's character. I can't stomach the mans face or voice

Unity Level 7 Apr 14, 2020
8

Desperate people who don’t have any self confidence would date anybody who asks them.

6

The only thing that kills it with a picture is a woman wearing a MAGA hat.

6

I'm on a "dating site" that has hundreds of questions one can answer or not for matching purposes. One of the questions asks if creationism should be taught in schools. One of the possible answers is, "Yes, students should hear both sides." I can't tell you how many women put this for their answer, but too many! And their education levels are the whole range, including graduate degrees. Creationism, intelligent design, whatever, is not, NOT science! It is religion dressed up to try to look like science, but it lacks all the necessary requirements to be a science, like empirical evidence. As soon as I see a woman answer it this way, I don't go any further. I tried to answer, "Too religious, cigarettes, and Trump supporter." But it only lets me pick one.

6

I WANT to date women who smoke marijuana!

6

I don't date anymore. When I did date, what I had a hard time with was the overwhelming amount of men out there who just wanted a one-night stand/hook up and then they would be on their way. In my 50s, and I felt like the men my age had successfully regressed back to their horny high school days of getting a piece/a notch in their belt but could care less about actually trying to form a connection.

I gave it three years dating, met someone whom I was in a relationship for 2 years. Found out he lied to me about some very important areas, and that he couldn't pass up any woman who blinked at him. I decided I had enough, made peace with the idea of being single and going it alone, figured out that I was really happy just being with me, and that was it. No regrets.

Good luck with dating. I hope you find what you're looking for.

Our loss..

When you are single you aren't alone. You have yourself. Enjoy.

6

I voted for "too religious" but I'd say there's other factors that can ruin a relationship.
1st I'd never date a religious man, I like to make it clear right away that I'm an agnostic.
2nd: men that take their parents opinion for everything
3rd: bad sex
4th: men that speak bad about their ex or don't have a relationship with their kids
5th: men that don't like animals
6th: men that have an explosive behavior
That's the ones I could think of the top of my head I probably can find more. Lol!

Wow I started reading the others answer's and now I think that I went to deep on my frustrations with the men's world! Lol πŸ˜‚

6

None of the above.
I'm done with dating, and romantic relationships.

Yes, and as was proven by the earths reaction when you briefly considered dating again, we all owe you a huge debt for changing your mind.

So thank you.

@1of5 You're welcome!

@Trumpeter Hermit Gator.

5

I like the willing!

5

I like the really short list of no-gos that I saw from a woman on a reality show called Blind Date. She said, " I just want to meet someone that I don't feel like killing at the end of the day". Words to live by......

5

My biggest challenge in dating women was a little different than yours, mostly that I like men too much. 😏
But to be sure, otherwise I can relate. My absolute disqualifiers: smokers, committed Republicans, religiously devout anything.
After that, it is more about what intrigues me than what offends. Having said that, a totally selfish person without empathy totally kills it for me, I don't care how beautiful they are physically.
Oh, and somebody totally indifferent to animals is a red flag for me.

5

Not interested in fat, lazy, out of shape guys. Hate long white beards and hair: it looks like shit. Too lazy to shave.

"I love hiking!" men proclaim on the phone. Turns out they last hiked in their 20s or in the Army at age 18. If a man has not exercised nor had a healthy diet for 40 years, he's not going to start now. Liar, liar pants on fire.

Other dealbreakers: smoking, drugs including marijuana, Trump supporter, and religious zealots who try to convert me.

A hard NO to man-children who never learned to cook, who expect me to do all of the meal planning, cooking and house cleaning. What is this, the 1950s?

Good for you. I am a little surprised at no marijuana. I've always thought if some's use was mild to moderate, like mild to moderate drinking, it would be OK. I would weigh it in the context of the overall combination of attributes. For many, yes, it is a red flag, but not all.

@Mitch07102

Being around stoners is boring.

Stoners lie around eating anything not nailed down, saying, "Wow, look at Kathleen go!"

@LiterateHiker Yes, you would not do well with a drug-induced sloth.

5

The problem with men that are too religious from my experience is that they are always trying to throw in some reason on why I should believe. And some treat me with less respect because they feel that none believers are somehow less than them or bad. One told me he can’t ever take our relationship serious because I’m a non believer. While he’s the one being the cheater and liar.

5

Smoke doesn't bother me but hyper religious is a big problem

bobwjr Level 10 Apr 14, 2020
4

I can do without overweight women with a ton of baggage and drama. Don't care too much their political or religious views so long as they respect mine and we can either rationally discuss or not talk about it. Age not an issue so long as they take care of themselves and have some depth of character. No thanks on drug (nicotine, alcohol, marijuana) addicts.

4

Since your poll will only let me choose one, I guess I will list the deal breakers you have chosen that would be deal breakers for me, too. I wouldn't date anyone who is too religious, smokes cigarettes, or is a Trump supporter. The other things don't matter to me.

Deb57 Level 8 Apr 15, 2020
4

Really, too religious, cigarettes, or a Trump supports would be deal breakers for me. When I had to choose though, cigarettes are the worst...

4

I would have to go with more than one: Trump supporter (even if an atheist); religious; cigarettes. I wouldn't discount someone who drinks or uses marijuana; but wouldn't be interested in someone who did either in excess.

How much is in excess?

@ronnie40356 More than one drink, or one joint, per year (LOL). If someone uses either to the point where it interferes with life and relationships or is detrimental to their health. I don't like how MJ affects me, so I don't use it. And, I rarely drink alcohol. I don't like beer but will have a little wine now and again: with dinner, for example. But, I never drink alone--ever.

4

No: Republicans, Libertarians, Tea Baggers, and dog forbid: sovereign citizens. πŸ™„ No evangelicals, no β€˜god-fearing’, etc. The farthest I’ll try is a generic β€˜spiritual’.
No heavy drinking, smoking, or heavy drug use. A bit of 420, ok, but getting up to get baked and STAYING baked all damn day, every day: nope.
Recent photos showing the face and eyes(not hats/sunglasses) are a must. Be truthful about height and weight. If we meet, I’m going to notice if those claims were false...and I’ll wonder what ELSE he/she is lying about.
Last but not least: I attract narcissists and similar toxic people, so I start out slow to watch for red flags. The more malignant they are, the shorter the time they can hide the sides. Learned that the hard way; please benefit from my pain!

not much left lol

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