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Religion is like a penis.

; ) ; ) ; ) This cracked me up.

silvereyes 8 Feb 7

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Religion IS like a penis. It can really fuck you (up).

Well said and accurate!

I love it ....

Eventually all Penises are buried 6' under in a grave yard or cremated and turned to dust.

So what's Religion waiting for...!

Hi there !
Friend you're definately right ! ))


#5, don't tell people it's bigger than it really is.


I dunno about this. A penis is actually useful.

d_day Level 7 May 21, 2018

And dual-purpose

Or a weapon in the wrong hands


Religion is like a penis? I beg to differ. I don't like religion.

Why dislike religion? It may really mean nothing but, like penis, can make you feel good! It's all in how you perceive and use it.


I think religion is more like a vagina:

  • You enter the church and get comfortable.
  • You try to last the full 45 mins til mass is over.
  • You fail and fall asleep.
  • You give the pastor money before you leave.

I'm not sure if that makes religion more like a vagina or a Taiwanese hooker but you get the idea.

@Brascan The fact is the comparison would work with a hooker of any nationality but I'm partial to Asians so...

must be a really boring hooker if you fall asleep, why would you pay her?


I need to remember not to be drinking anything when I read your posts. I wound up spitting coffee over my tablet. It's all good.



Religion is like a vagina.
It's ok to have one and to be proud of it.
But don't walk around showing it off and acting if yours is the only one that matters.

Wait a minute! Men have been showing/bragging/putting up statues and monuments of penises for eons and yet the vagina has been kept covered, secret and denigrated for way too long. Perhaps that's where the problem lies and it's just another example of religion and male domination gone wrong. Vagina's should be respected and honored more. They have been suppressed so much that even women don't understand much about them. It's unbelievable, the # of men and women that don't understand such things as the importance of the clitoris (or if it even exists) and the commercials and misinformation about hygiene and how it should smell (natural)! Now, back to the cute jokes. 🙂

@jorj they really had their heads on straight. Sex should be highly regarded and valued by all people.

@frosty2k There's something fishy about this reply...


My penis is offended by being compared to religion.


Even when I wanted to give it a try it left a bad taste in my mouth.


"Religion is like having a classroom where the students have to show up every day, but there's no teacher. There are a bunch of books around and no one is even sure which on is the book. Some students insist on one book; others argue just as hard for another. Then suddenly, on the last day, the teacher appears and says he's been watching everybody the whole time. He praises the ones who chose the right book and sends them off to have cookies and milk.

And then he sets everyone else on fire."


Other ways it’s like a penis:

Invite one into your life and you’ll get screwed.

Getting rid of it after inviting it in may cause excessive drama.

A lot of people who have one tend to be overly eager to share it.

They all have nuts hangin around.

Well said!


if I read it too hard I will go blind?




Well.....where's the fun in that?

My penis is, quite frankly, insulted by the comparison to religion. Because, it's REAL.


And...keep yours out of my vagina, too! (I think about this a lot while working at Planned Parenthood. How many of these hypocrites would come running into the procedure room, yelling "ONWARD CHRISTIAN SOLDIERS" and smugly rip the speculum out of a patient. You KNOW they would, if they could.)


Religion is connected to 90percent of the world"s wars. Don't those bullets and missiles look like penises?

Only 90%? I'd suspect it's higher than that!

Actually the cult Government and Centro Bankers tool Religion. In order to fear control and enslaved most of us.

Yes, as George Carlin pointed out at least once on stage. I still miss him.


Religion is also a lot like alcohol.
It's fine if it's just something you do on the weekends, but starts to become a problem if it's something you do everyday. Especially in front of your kids


You're completely right !!! 🙂


Every time I catch them in there greed I call the religious people men penis religion. I was scared to say it in my younger years. But I am tired, please stop the men penis religion. Why do there wives don't work and all of them get cushy government jobs to support there good wives, sugar babies, tons of children. Infact the workers are paying for it. They are always promoted to corporate. Big corporation refuses to pay the worker but have lot of money for corporate travel,. Same with catholic charities.

Arshi Level 5 Aug 2, 2018

Let's see...because it just hangs around but is incapable of doing anything worthwhile?


Funny shit. So forking true.I have one and nobody is


The big pecker with the big wallet right?


That is perfect !!! Lol


This is a good analogy, and yet, most religious people love to "flaunt" their faith which is as unwelcomed and inapprorpriate as a dick pick or even worse, pull it out physically...


Brilliant! And true! And I think it applies to one's own children, not just other children – parents don't own their children, they are guardians and caretakers – not dictators or brutish prison guards.
Too many people think they have the right to impose their beliefs onto their children, rather than assisting them to become whoever it is that they will one day become – or realise who they were all along.

I want you be as practically correct as you are ideologically. There's a lot of parents that don't see anything wrong with indoctrinating their children.

Just like a drunk abusive parent indoctrinating their children into the habit.

A lot of parents are mistaken, then.
The most important thing is to be emotionally mature, so as to provide a solid foundation for their children – insecure parents pass on their insecurities to their children.
Ideally, only emotionally mature people would ever have children, or raise children.
I'm never having kids, as I don't pass muster. I don't even have a pet cat, though I adore cats.


My line would be because most Christians are dick heads


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