Glad you got something out of it and got to see old friends. As for me, the farther away from a church I am the better off I am.

Farther along we'll know all about it
Farther along we'll understand why
Cheer up my brother live in the sunshine
We'll understand it all by and by

The old song is true. I no longer go to church because I am farther along than before. I no longer have a candle or a little light that is mine.

Sounds good !

Unitarian churches are the ones I even remotely consider attending due to their "open" nature.

I visit graveyards. Have seen enough churches in the old country.

LiterateHiker, I fully agree this is how a church should be, but my local UU church is now anything but what you describe. Ironically, there is a small, very liberal UCC church right down the street from me, but they use the Bible and are Christian. I would probably fit in great there socially and share all their politics. And I've heard they have all the qualities of the UU church you visited. But I'm not going to lie or pretend to believe or be a Christian just to attend and enjoy their community.

I made several really great friends at my local Unitarian church in the early 90s and they are still with me today. I also met my late wife because of these connections while she was attending a UU church about 30 miles away. The UU churches are full of great ideals and people who are Agnostic, Atheist, and/or Humanist as well as almost all very politically liberal to socialist. But the longer I was there, at least at my local one, the more turned off I was by how classist and cliqueish most of the members were. It started to seem more like a country club for intellectuals than a community that actually valued and embraced all members equally, whether they drove a bus or were a doctor, which was exactly the opposite of how I remember the Catholic church where I grew up. Because there, everybody felt welcome and valued, no matter their social or economic standing. Yes, there was probably cliqueishness there too, but it was so blatant at the UU church in spite of all the rhetoric and lip service about it being a caring community and respecting the dignity and worth of every human being etc.

I got really disgusted with it and then withdrew even more after my late wife's dementia became late stage. I didn't need to be around negative stuff. Nowadays, I could probably meet someone to date as a widower there that would be compatible, but I just don't feel eager to go spend time there (even when I still know some people there) when I already feel treated as indesireable by Match.com and most of the people at the church that you meet will be quick to ask you what you do for a job so they can size you up on whether you fit in with them and are on their class level. Lots of middle management and corporate types. If you don't fit, they will be very quick to walk away and ignore you. That's the kind of classist bullshit I'm talking about, along with the fact that very few of them care about economic justice or inequality, no matter how much the ministers keep talking about social justice, which usually amounts to identity stuff like gay rights, feminism, race, immigrants, etc.. All stuff that's not offensive to upper middle class types.

My late wife's old UU church is not so classist or cliqueish because it is much smaller, but because it's in a smaller college town, it has very few people my age. Part of the problem with my local one is its size, about 500 members. It's grown too large and impersonal compared to the early 90s and nowadays, for example, when they get to the part of the service for sharing milestones, joys and concerns, etc. in the lives of the members and their families, you have to submit those in advance by e-mail or in writing and they are read out loud by the minister. Very bureaucratic and impersonal.

My UU fellowship is lay led, we have programs of interest to the community. Never a mention of any personage you must believe in or dogma to believe. Good people with lots of different viewpoints but nobody pushing anything on anybody. I was recently elected the president of the board of directors and am en living the place up a bit. We are called a liberal religion but there is no religion present in my fellowship.

Interesting (to me) information about Unitarianism: Four presidents of the United States were Unitarians. One of our greatest founding fathers, John Adams, was one of them. He was a strong advocate of the separation of church and state. In 1797, he signed the "Treaty of Tripoli", in which he wrote, "“As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion,—as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquility, of Mussulmen [Muslims]..." Some of our modern politicians would be well served by re-reading that passage.

yes I enjoy going to UU meetings every now and then . I love it when its an all women group too, I don't mind it when its not but somehow just a wee bit more evocative and clearer when its nearly all in one range

I was surprised to learn that a Unitarian church in my area (northern Virginia) actually mentions Jeebus and sings hymns. But apparently the local UU churches have a wide latitude. Some congregations actually call their buildings meeting houses, not churches.

Brilliantly! Sounds like the ecumenical services that joined the Catholic and (Protestant ) Church of Ireland communities in my home in Ireland. It's fantastic when people put aside their differences and acknowledge that we are all human, fragile and vulnerable. This to me is community, regardless of religion.
My parent recently went to a Quakrr wedding and reported a similar experience to yours, very all encompassing.
Now, if only we could put the invisible friends aside.....

That’s what we need more of. If we had churches giving out messages without mention of religions I think we can convert some to our way of thinking.

Cool. We've talked about trying to start a little UU church here. We have a chance to talk about it with someone from the UU organization sometime in the near future. It would be amazing if we could make it work. Reading this made me more excited to see those conversations get started.

That sounds great! I'm currently trying to start a Unitarian church in my area because there isn't one. I did briefly attend one in college, and my impression was "this is where the smart people go" because there was a lot of interest in different cultures and religions, and tolerance for other views, including atheism.

Some of my clients attend Unitarian churches all around the country. Seems that some are a bit theistic minded and some are totally secular, humanistic even. Some love it, some left due to a bit too much spiritual talk. I like the idea of gathering for life-affirming messages and discussion.

I think each congregation defined how much religion goes into their services. Supply and demand, I guess. Glad you found a great fit for you in your area.

I agree that the golden rule should be to treat others how THEY would like to be treated, not necessarily how you would like to be treated. Sometimes they are one and the same - sometimes not.

My family was invited to a wedding at a Unitarian Church a month ago. I didn't mind the service at all and it was quite affirming. At the reception the minister, or whatever he is called, poured drinks for all. Really upbeat.

Religion is simply nothing more than a tool for which you can either build or destroy with it.
That’s why I don’t judge religious people until they give me a reason to. Yet sadly the concept of unity and fellowship has been lost on most of society let alone the church but it’s also said that religion is merely a reflection of society so it’s next phase should be very interesting.

I love that. I wish that it was in my neighbourhood

I might have to try one☺

Carrying the flaming saber of justice sounds a tad overwrought and probably reflects that he's a social justice warrior, which is fine ... but the intensity can be a little off-putting to me. The local UUs here have been known to chain themselves to the entrance gate of the local fracking facility, and social status is tied partly to how many time's you've been arrested. Not my cup o'tea but I admire their devotion to their ideals.

I haven't felt the acceptance and connection you describe with the UUs here but it's probably more me than them I suppose.

I have been to Unitarian churches before and found them as you describe. If they would take "church" out of their title and hold get-togethers on other days of the week, I might still attend occasionally.

Would it be the same if you knew no one there?

I hear good things about them .. I'd be interested just to meet liberal minded people

When I was going through a rough patch in a relationship I felt I needed some kind of guidance or uplift. I went to the local Unitarian Universalist church a couple of Sundays. It didn’t help. Still felt shitty, didn’t get any insight and it’s still involves a magical entity in the Universe somewhere. Went to see a shrink, it was much more productive! ?

When I was in High School in Denver, I did a program with the Unitarian Church where every weekend for a couple of months we went to a different church service. We did just about every denomination out there. It was interesting and fun.