This message from men floors me. "What does he want to know?" I wonder. My personal history? The onus is on me to entertain him.
Yesterday I got that message from a man in Germany. "I suggest you focus on women in Germany," I replied.
Reminds me of my mother. "How are you really?" Mom repeatedly asked. Because I was born prematurely, Mom saw me as delicate, even as an adult.
"What do you want, my bowel movements?" I replied, amused, to sidestep the question.
How do you answer, "I want to know more about you"?
"Call me on the telephone so we can chat like real human beings, please."
I HATE robotic, always out of sync text with a deep, seething passion.
Another great choice. I prefer it as well.
I thought you and the flying physician were "an item".
Nope. In addition to working full time as a medical doctor and taking call for other doctors, Bill is an obsessive, competitive bicycle rider. He rides 100-200 miles/week.
He also volunteers at a free clinic for low income people. Recently Bill took another job, flying search and rescue missions for the police.
"I have no spare time," Bill said. That's his choice.
@LiterateHiker Do not grieve for what might have been,his decision may one day come to haunt his choice.....
I don't feel sad. All Bill wanted was sex, anyway.
I’d enjoy an open ended opportunity to expand on myself.
Also, it’s not necessarily a prompt for a response. It is not a question. It is a statement.
What do you want to know? What people want to know can reveal quite a bit about their priorities, and of course you should not reveal more than you want to, and they should reciprocate by telling you more about themselves, if they don't, ditch them.
.
If you don't like correspondence over a distance, tell them so up front. I think that it is bad though to just write someone off based on distance, not because I think anything could come of it, most likely not, but because there is a huge benefit in getting to know people from other countries, I have over 4000 friends on my Facebook account from countries all over the world . . . and talk about getting some seriously original thoughts and views! Would not trade it for all the American friends in the world.
Being somewhat familiar with your style of writing from this site, I can't imagine that you didn't already share a fair amount of description about yourself, so the suitor should have had a more specific question, if he was truly curious about something in particular.
It was likely just his "line" though not a very good one. Your reply was to the point. You're not interested in a relationship with someone outside your geographic range.
Assuming this exchange was through a dating site, I suppose he just wanted to start a conversation or flirt with you for online jollies, since meeting in real life would be unlikely.
There are some friend/dating apps that don't offer much space to describe oneself, so if someone were to ask for more information, it would be an opportunity to add more criteria and not waste anyone's time. But the question should be a bit more narrowly focused on what the person wants to know, leading the conversation in some direction.
Read my profile and look at my photos.
Men say I did a great job of describing myself and what I love to do with clarity, humor and fun.
@LiterateHiker that is what I was thinking. Did they not read my/your profile? If that is the case, they are too lazy for a serious answer or the time spent discussing anything.
It's a fast, easy, and lazy way of pretending to start a conversation without actually making any effort to personalize the approach. And, yes, it does place all the burden on the respondent so a sarcastic or disinterested reply is completely justified.
I recommend sarcasm, it's the most fun.
Exactly. Well said.
I think you’re over thinking it a bit. It’s just another way to say “I’m interested in you”. Ignore the question if you’re for some reason interested in them or ignore them altogether if not. It’s really not a good litmus test for judging someone’s personality.
"I always find that question offputting... Why don't you tell me something interesting about yourself and we can have a conversation?" (not really actually I stutter and say wierd sht but I think that would be a great answer)
I think it is a well intentioned but uncreative question. Just talk about stuff and let the details come out, or at least ask more specific questions..
Although I understand how the vagueness or openness of the question can make for a weak icebreaker, I either ask directly "Sure, what would you like to know?" or I assume they want to know what's important to me and I'll tell a bit about what I value in life. I figure it's just someone trying to connect and express interest, and not everyone is a great conversationalist. Hell, I can be a little awkward sometimes, so I try not to hold it against others who don't have the best or smoothest approach.
yes ask them what hey would like to know because more than likely they will be at a loss of what to ask you and a good come back I will tell you when the time is right if we get that far
My favorite comeback is from George Carlin. "Hey, how are u today?" is the lamest message I get from too many guys.
"Not unwell, thank you," I reply. crickets
With a reply like that it does not lead into an answer to continue the conversation along those lines ,so he must change the subject
As a compulsive oversharer, I'm more likely to get a frantic waving of hands followed by "TELL ME LESS! TELL ME LESS!"
Ha ha, same
Questions generally tell you more about someone than answers. If that's the best he can do, a clear signal to move on.
I always answer, "what would you like to know? Ask me anything. The worst thing I can do is tell you it's none if your business."
Granted, that may not be the most successful comeback considering I am still single.
Hey i want know more about you!
He lives in Germany. What's the point?
@LiterateHiker could be a friend! No harm in that
Life is short. It's a waste of time.
@LiterateHiker hahaha i am kidding with you
@LiterateHiker That statement you just made to @GreatNani sounds like a riposte to Ashley Maddison's slogan!
Oooh, I love that you said "riposte." Good word choice. Talk to me, baby....
@LiterateHiker I love the vast vocabulary of English. On another thread here, I put forward the expression "Shog off", as used by Shakespeare.
Shog is to move with alacrity, so adding the off is, being polite, "begone".
I've used the expression since my late teens. It is an utterly innocuous, yet most concise way to convey one's feelings.
@LiterateHiker There are various people here with whom I would love a coffee date.
Me, too. Dictionary.com sends me a word a day. Love language.
"What does that word mean?" my daughter asked. "Look it up," I replied. Then I relented and gave her a simple synonym.
"Why didn't you use the easy word instead?" Claire asked.
"Because I love the shade of meaning in the original word," I replied and laughed.
Claire rolled her eyes into the next state.
@LiterateHiker Tell her that words have subtly different meanings. I love being concise, rather than vague and therefore open to misinterpretation.
Even concise has a double requirement. It needs to be precise and also brief.
@LiterateHiker I've never bothered with "word of the day" websites. Sometimes, for fun, I read a dictionary, but most of the words I use I learned in my youth, from education and a voracious appetite for books.
I seldom read fiction, but I love fact and history, etc
Try looking up "pottle" and 'podher". It's a podher to fill a non-tamper pottle.