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How old were you when you got married for the first time?

"For many people, regardless of sexual orientation, a wedding is no longer the first step into adulthood that it once was, but, often, the last. It is a celebration of all that two people have already done, unlike a traditional wedding, which was a celebration of what a couple would do in the future.

Consistent with this shift in meaning, different-sex couples, like the many of the same-sex couples who have married recently, are starting their marriages later in their lives. According to the Census Bureau, the median age at first marriage—the age at which half of all marriages occur—was 27.4 for women and 29.5 for men in 2017. That’s higher than at any time since the Census began keeping records in 1890."

[theatlantic.com]

VictoriaNotes 9 Mar 24
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85 comments (26 - 50)

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1

I was 20, and we are still married. Will be celebrating our 11th anniversary in a few months!

1

I was 30. College educated. Had my own house on the family farm. Had 3 used cars, all paid for and all running! No student loan debt, no debt period! I was the most elligible bachelor in the county. Then I got married and it all went to hell. You'd have thought that carrying your own water amounted to being respected but that ain't always the case. Some wives want it all and expect someone else to provide it. Never again!

5

21 and 58 years later going strong even though both parents did not approve and they gave us 6 mos at most. We had $87 between us.

1

25 yrs old In 1995. My wife was 24. Married only once, 22 yrs. I think the trend toward marrying later is smart. It may also be a consequence of harder financial times, student debt and caution based on learning more about the legal consequences if that marriage should fail.

0

Being such an introvert (and social misfit) it took me 28 years to get married (the first time - did I mention I am also a slow learner). She was 22.

What about you?

1

I was 30. Thought if I waited it would last forever.

1

I was 24 and she was 25. Lasted for 36 years and the divorce became final on the 36th wedding anniversery.

BillF Level 7 Mar 25, 2018

WOW! That is a long time and not being able to get to the finish line. You must be
left with many wonderful memories

That was a hell of a run (not in a bad sense). Good on ya!

0

I was 28, and got a divorce 28 years later. That was 9 and a half years ago. No regrets. I mostly enjoyed being married, but I also like being single. I'm on great terms with my ex, and my kids are ok with the whole situation.

1

21 and 21 -- two lonely nerds who met in Calculus class - both far far away from home ... decided to get married when we realized we were probably never going to find "anything better" - calculating, but ... She carried us for the first 10 years, we had 20 "salad years" -- then she invoked the "in sickness and health clause" and passed after 20yr of grief. What would I change? -- don't honestly know - good times/bad times -

0

I was 21. Jesus that was a long time ago. I feel ancient.

1

I was 27 when I married the first time. My ex was 25. We had 3 daughters and lasted 18 years. The thing was, I still loved him when we divorced. There just was no way we could be together without hurting each other. There was so much stuff that had calcified between us and it took the divorce - with its physical and more importantly emotional separation - to dissolve it. After the divorce was finalized, we started being able to be kinder to each other and we co-parent well together now.

@VictoriaNotes You are welcome. I don't have bad feelings towards marriage, but it does tend to complicate things for some reason. Like you can give your friends a lot more grace than the person you live with 24/7. I think people do better with space between them. 🙂

I was married two more times myself. After some time to let the bitterness lose its bite, I became friends with both. My second wife and I had a son and we were married 22 years, We decided to bury the hatchet when our son's wife became pregnant with our first grandchild and remained friends until she died of cancer about a year ago. My third wife was from Slovakia (not a bought bride! ?) and had a one year old son that I fell in love with as much as I did with her. I knew we had issues, but thought we could work them out to keep the boy growing up here in the US. It didn't work, but we stuck it out long enough for them to get their permanent Green Cards. She left me and we didn't communicate much for about five years, until she mentioned in an email that the guy she left me for was ignoring her son. So, I said I would be glad to help out with him in anyway I could. I was really the only father he had known, we were together the first 5 years of his life. She eventually got rid of the boyfriend and we spend time together (with no sexual benefits) since neither of us have anyone else in our lives. And it's looking like that will be the story for the rest of my life, since I can't seem to even get a date for dinner nowadays.

0

26 when first married. It lasted 13 years

0

Married at 53 so that my Nazi family wouldn't get my porfolio when a near death experience jumped me. I would never have married & really dislike having to say I am, cause it is open save for the finances. He is a house mate not the other kind of mate.

@VictoriaNotes Thanks. But my current situation is fine other than having a house mate. He has his own bathroom so it is all good.=0}

0

I was 27 and she was an older woman aged 30

0

I was 23, he was 24. We had twenty great years, but cancer ended it. I did not feel young or immature. I now look at my 21 YO daughter and wonder how things changed so much. She's at 21 like I was at 19.

Zster Level 8 Mar 25, 2018

Me, too. Cancer is a monster.

1

A mere stripling of 21. Lasted for a wonderful 26 years .

0

I was in my early 30’s

1

I was 24. I didn't have the inner security, maturation, experience needed to make it a good one.

0
  1. btw the date was 07/07/07 and it didn't last 5 years, so much for 7 being a lucky number!! Although perhaps it was, I got two amazing daughters and it didn't last the rest of life 🙂

Glass half full I guess lol

0

I was married at 18 years far too young but our marriage lasted 30 years so not too bad...Difficult at first for me being on my own after we seperated but have learnt alot about myself and am happy in my skin..

0

25 and it was a mistake

0

43 and still single. I can't even get a date. Too shy and when I do force myself to speak to a lady I like I'm every kind of irritating awkward. A familiar story.

1

I was 40. The marriage gave us 3 wonderful children but ended in divorce after 10 years.

0

Bad mistake except for my daughter. She didn't cry when she was born - she growled.

Only one thing we agreed on: When the vicar came round to arrange the date for her christening we both agreed that we would wait until she could make her own mind up. My daughter is a fervent atheist.

0

About 32 I think and naively I thought it would save our relationship which is ridiculous and I don't believe in marriage.

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