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Why, after almost a year, am I still in love with the woman who lied to me about being divorced and ran away with our newborn daughter before I could legally establish paternity? I feel like such a failure because I can't get over her. If she showed up on my doorstep tomorrow, I would do anything to make her happy even though she's made me miserable. Sometimes I just wish I'd never met her. Then I wouldn't have to feel like this.

Jurnee 5 Nov 2
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5 comments

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0

So you are not paying child support? There are literally billions of women better than that. So many that want a loving guy.

4

One cannot control what the heart wants. You can of course choose to make healthy decisions for your own life while still loving her with all of your heart.

Nukdookum Level 8 Nov 2, 2018

What Nukdookum said! I loved my narcissistic husband for years after I had to leave him to save my sanity. I still have love for him but finally stopped being "in love" with him. The fact that you still love her just shows that you have a great heart and capacity for love. Don't lose that and just channel it toward finding someone worthy of it. I hope you find your child; because you can still be a loving dad without being involved with her mother. All the best.

1

I'm sorry man, I can't imagine the pain of not knowing where you daughter is.

5

Where is your child? You should immediately take her to court so you can establish paternity. If you don't know where she is, start searching. And what you are feeling is not uncommon. Are you in therapy? That is a good place to start.

GreatNani Level 8 Nov 2, 2018

I've already exhausted all of my resources with court and trying to find them. I don't know what to do about that anymore. And yeah, I've been seeing a therapist. But therapy doesn't help you unlove someone. I wish it could though.

@Jurnee Therapy will help you figure out why you love someone who is not good for you. And how to work through it. I am so very sorry about your little one. If you can find her that might help. I would keep close tabs on her family and friends and hold on to hope.

1

Love is unconditional

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