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Mens contempt for women in general.
There is a thread of absolute contempt for women and all things considered womanish that runs through the psyches of many, many men. I see and hear telltale comments all the time. "Like a girl" "women all..." "Bitches" "women are crazy" "all my exes are psycho". Men who do not display this mindset are few and far between. I am very happy to call those men friends. Personally I have made a resolution to never date a man who displays this attitude.
Ladies, weeding these dudes out of your dating pool pays off in dividends. It's kind of sad that I've only recently experienced what a relationship with someone who legitimately likes me and doesn't harbor that deep seated hatred for myself and people like me. (He is wonderful and very taken, sorry ladiessmile009.gif ) it makes all the difference.
Men, you may take a moment and ask yourselves if you harbor this idea, why that is and whether it may be the thing keeping you from having a happy and lasting relationship.

By OpposingOpposum
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23 comments

13

Something else that occurs to me. Men who have this attitude repel women who are sane enough to avoid it which narrows their dating pool to women who are self loathing enough to be ok with that behaviour and women just out to use them. These guys are literally shooting themselves in the foot then running around crying that women ruin their lives.

OpposingOpposum Level 8 Dec 2, 2018

Thank you for this post. I wish I had read it before I dated the last person I did. It's very scary.

Edited

That's very insightful. They are in a vicious cycle.

12

When I encounter sexism I generally pass by and keep moving. I don't have time and it isn't my place to teach them better. It's like teaching a pig to sing. It annoys the pig and wastes your time.

HippieChick58 Level 9 Dec 2, 2018

great analogy.... and yes I have to agree - by the time you're well into adulthood, people are who and what they are. Nobody "changes" anyone - you can help an individual knock the rough edges off but that's pretty much it. I think it helps if you pay attention to how he treats his friends, relatives, coworkers - not just the that little "courtship" dance that he does for you.

@HippieChick58 and @Lavergne Ditto what you both said.

12

And - we have a winner.
We are not supposed to be competing with each other (men vs women) but rather - complimenting each other.
You cut up the firewood - I'll make the shrimp scampi.
How friggen hard was that?

Lavergne Level 7 Dec 2, 2018

I have a hard time getting this point across to women. They just don't seem to want to adapt.

The problem is in our society cutting up firewood is seen as fine skill worthy of admiration and respect, so you better use your lesser skills and make that f** shrimp scampi.

@Kojaksmom Hahahahaha Oh honey - I can chainsaw with the best of them.... my husband, on the other hand, couldn't fix shrimp scampi if his life depended on it.

@Lavergne but my point is our society instinctively values all characteristics that essentially are more masculine. Our society considers most characteristics that are instinctively feminine to be weak and less valuable.

@Kojaksmom
Lololololol! Ha ha ho ha her whooo, oh, my, THAT was HILARIOUS!

Please tell my you’re being facetious. You can’t possibly be serious.

@Dangrenade I am serious. I'll give you an example. a woman who shakes her tits in your face for entertainment gets paid more than a nurse. Look at our current Administration Trump is a man's man. We live in such a shit violent Society because of it. Give me a list of why you're right of all the things that are valued in our culture that are not Macho and violent

Edited

@Kojaksmom

Open a paper. Read a magazine. Go online. Watch the news. Do your own research. But most of all, OPEN YOUR EYES, and open your mind.

You need to do yourself a favor (seriously) and watch “The Red Pill”.

But you won’t, because you cling to your hatred of men like a security blanket. Nothing and no one can persuade you differently.

Enjoy your hate filled rage.

Edited

@Dangrenade I will. In the meantime I hope you can recover from constant degradation because you're a man. The red pill movement basically States that only the most violent dominant males are worthy of breeding. No thanks.

Edited

@Kojaksmom nice straw man argument you got there

@Dangrenade Google it yourself that's exactly what it is. It's close to incel philosophy.

Edited

@Kojaksmom lololol! Oooh, hahahaha, OMG, woman, you make me LAUGH!!!

Thanks!

@Kojaksmom

[avoiceformen.com]

Add to the list above “Being called “incel” if I defend myself/my gender against unfair accusations”.

Edited

@Dangrenade I suppose we could argue about white privilege too huh?

@Kojaksmom l disagree. Who is 'society'? It's the famous 'They say...' There is no 'they' dictating anything. There is no collective decision. I agree that perspective is widespread but you might consider dealing with one person at a time. Otherwise you're implicating everyone! Don't assume that because you feel degraded that all other women feel the same. Many don't. Many of those who do, simply toss those with that attitude out of their lives and move forward to enjoy their life. I hope that eventually you can see your way clear to do that as well.

@Kojaksmom I hope you can recover.

@MojoDave I hope you can too. There are many social experiments that have been conducted that support a generalized way that people think. No it doesn't apply to all, but you may be surprised at the percentages that it does. To simply say there is no problem does not make it go away.

Edited
10

In my mind I've always viewed women as equal but different. They could be just as loving or devious as any man. When I come into contact with any human being I am wary of the kind of person it might be until I get to know them.

OldGoat43 Level 7 Dec 2, 2018

Right? People are people. Some of us persist in saying "this person has a penis so they are better/worse than others" or a different color skin or any of the other myriad ways you can classify folks. It just isn't so. Group membership, particularly groups you have no choice in whether or not to join, is not a guarantee that you are a good person or a bad one.

10

If a man can't respect you, he can't love you.

dare2dream Level 7 Dec 2, 2018
10

Well said. There is a contempt for women that is passed from generation to generation. These men are easy to spot. I won't date a man that has a hatred for any population.

Wildflower Level 7 Dec 2, 2018

@wildflower But some of these men are incredibly Insidious. Many of them present as a man who is trustworthy and kind, but sometimes there's something else lurking underneath the surface. eventually their true colors shine through. When you're dealing with men that hate women it literally, for them, is a game of the hunted and the Hunter.

Edited

@Kojaksmom yes, you are right. They are not always easy to spot.

9

Women are my EQUAL....PERIOD!!!

Our_existance Level 8 Dec 2, 2018
8

The term for this is misogyny, and yes, it's unfortunately still all too commonly ingrained in men. But to be fair, I do think it's less common than it used to be. Progress never comes as fast as we'd like.

Amzungu2 Level 7 Dec 2, 2018

Because man has been in total control since we stood up on two feet he has held everything he believes to be below him in check. How many women in Congress? How many women in the banking industry? How many women in seats of power as CEOs of large corporations? And then how many of them get paid for doing the job a man does equally.

7

True, I have drawn the conclusion that most men hate women. It's one of the reasons why I don't date or trust men anymore.I've given up .

Kojaksmom Level 8 Dec 2, 2018

Sad isn't it? I know there are good men out there, but they're a rare find. I've just opened myself up to getting my needs met.

Totally agree! I'm in the same spot you are. I've given up for the same reason. Can't seem to trust them anymore. Anytime I let my guard down and decide to trust them, they do something to take it away.

@Aushra yeah me too. Its not worth it. These days it can get you killed to let your guard down. It's not just sexism it's just the strange way that men use women.

Edited

It takes only one or two bad guys to ruin things for the good guys. I'm sadden by your (and everyone here's) cynicism. The good guys end up paying for the offenses of the bad who came before them.

@dare2dream perhaps you're right. I am negative and always expect the worst from Men. I will also say that more times than not I'm right. Whenever I let my guard down and give a man a
chance, I'm usually either used or let down. I've drawn the conclusion that it's by far more beneficial to avoid the bad, than it is to find a good solid relationship.

Edited

@Kojaksmom, You may or may not find some comfort in knowing men get disappointed, used and let down too. But, as they say, "Faint heart never won a fair maid". No matter how many times our hearts are broken or we are disappointed we must be brave enough to risk our heart again. If we are not receptive, nothing good can come into our life. That keeps me going.

6

I think some of the comments made by men here are tongue in cheek. Remember, I said 'some'. The ones I think are serious, I just pass by and don't comment.

Alvinsmama Level 7 Dec 2, 2018

Tongue in cheek just means that they don't take the issue seriously. And that's part of the problem.

5

"What sane species would treat half of its members — and the very half which gives birth to the whole species — with such contempt and injustice?" Steve Taylor, Ph.D. (Psychology Today 8/30/2012)

VictoriaNotes Level 8 Dec 7, 2018

I'm reading Octavia Butler atm, on DeeTee's suggestion and I am amazed at her deft but light hand in exploring these aspects of the human psyche. She is as keen an observer as Vonnegut.

5

Well said. Xoxo smile015.gif.

CaroleKay Level 8 Dec 2, 2018
5

Thank you for this post. I wish I had read it before I dated the last person I did.

SukiSue Level 8 Dec 2, 2018

Yeah, me too and one before him... ..........

Edited
5

i presonally do not present this point of view there again i do not find women that represent my kind of view

BillLittleford Level 6 Dec 2, 2018
4

In my life/professional meeting 10 to 20 people a day ( customer service ) I feel 6 out 10 felt women were less than men. Man seized control by strength alone and has not put much into the evolution aspect of life. Women have proven to me to be more rounded in intelligence. I believe you only hold down what you fear.

Sept-10th Level 5 Dec 4, 2018
4

Hmm...never had any hatred for women...well except for the crazy bitches....jk...

Dwgwnr Level 5 Dec 2, 2018

And for most men a crazy bitch is a woman who doesn't treat a man like he was a fucking God.

@Kojaksmom right?!!

4

Thank you for this. Very well said.

JeremyTaylor Level 8 Dec 2, 2018
4

Well said.

Infoguy211 Level 8 Dec 2, 2018
3

In everything in life, we get what we settle for.

Sandy6767 Level 7 Dec 3, 2018

Some people change sometimes drastically for the worst.

3

Having been in a long term relationship that went sour. Both parties come out with wounds. You wouldn't believe the things my former spouse said to my parents when we separated. She actually tried to vent at my own father, and tried to turn him against me, or get sympathy.... It didn't help matters, but in retrospect I'm over it. Break ups lead to some hard emotions, and people get a little crazy. I'm sure if I went to a watering hole, and you got me drunk and reminiscing about my marriage gone wrong, I'd be saying the same crap. That's why I don't get drunk. I don't even want to know what I would say in that situation, and it wouldn't help me find a decent woman, apparently.

F-IM-Forty Level 5 Dec 3, 2018
2

Maybe we do, maybe we don't.... who knows..... each one of us know who we are and the people that needs to know they know too.

IamNobody Level 8 Dec 2, 2018

Oh, we know.

@Wildflower Of course you don't, you don't know me. Anyhow, why so much anger everywhere we look? Life is beautiful

@IamNobody That's the problem right there, pretending there is no problem. Or maybe being ignorant of the problem and not being open to learn. Of course you're content. You're a man in a man's world.

@Wildflower See, back to my point. There is NO man's world, there is no such thing as being ignorant of this line of thought. There is only people, some male some female. Some good, some bad and some even worst but we cannot throw the baby with the tub just because we feel that way on a given day. That's my comment, that's all.

@IamNobody I could not get credit in the 1960's without a man's signature, Women could not drive in Saudi Arabia. Birth control was illegal until 1964 in the USA. Control of our own bodies are being threatened. Women make 75% of what men do for the same performance. Female genital mutilation is performed by male doctors in Michigan. Fistula is caused by men. I can go on forever but I have to fight the power. Don't tell me it isn't a man;'s world. Rising up angry. Hear me roar!

@Countrywoman Why took you so long?... Hardly remember who the heck are you. One thing I can tell you though, you have issues and I am not the answer to your problems. Carry on with your life, I wish you well.

1

Almost no women eventually appreciates my profound devotion.

PinkyandtheBrain Level 7 Dec 3, 2018

After just a couple exchanges, I think I can see why.

1

This thread, and most of the comments, is a pig part of the problem with our society.

I was raised in a traditional family, believing that a man was to be a provider and protector of his wife and children, and the woman was to be a mother, nurturer, and take care of her husband.

Since men are stronger and more competitive by nature, they tend to do the heavy labor and earn more money. But yes, they also enjoy raising children and helping around the house. I was never one to expect a 50/50 division of labor. Men do more BY FAR.

But after two marriages to whiny, complaining, cheating women, who watch me do 10x the labor they do, earn 4x as much money, contribute more to the raising of the children, and STILL bitch if they think it’s “my turn” to vacuum or mop, because “feminism”, well, ladies, I’m on to you.

So right back atcha. If you’re gonna whine about how “men are awful” and “men are privileged”, I sure as hell am not interested in you.

Dangrenade Level 5 Dec 3, 2018

I completely understand 110% with you I am on the breaking point too. The children are the only shread holding us together.

The irony of his post and then him whining about being blocked, is laughable and sad at the same time.

@hippydog her post

@PinkyandtheBrain ????

How is it that you attract those women? Are you sure it's their fault?

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