it's the day after Christmas. some of us were lonely,and some of us were with loved ones. Does the holiday bring out the best in couples or the worst ? What was your experience
The first holiday season (Thanksgiving thru New Year's Eve) that we spent away from family and friends was as festive as I could make it - my husband said he wasn't used to holidays being quiet like that and he seemed a little disappointed. Now- some 30 plus holiday seasons later, he complains if he has to see anyone - go anywhere, etc etc. ????? If I ever needed a reason to simply "carry on" and not listen to the complaining from the peanut gallery, this seems like one.
I have had wonderful holidays and some that weren’t so wonderful. I don’t believe there is an answer to whether holidays bring out the best or worst in couples. I think folks are going to be folks and if it happens to be the holiday then it’s probably just a coincidence.
For me I was with loved ones but lonely. I guess it depends on the couple. My sister in-law and her husband got into a disagreement this Christmas. He got a gift card and decided to give it to someone else. She found out about it and she got pissed. She marched off. They were silent to each other the rest of the time I was there. It was sad.
The holidays can trend to be more stressful, in my experience. I'm the guy who wants to help, yet am told "Here's how you can help, go drink some eggnog".
So this year, for the first time in 11 years, I cooked for myself. I watched what I wanted. I nurtured and nourished my self. I allowed my self to embrace being whole.
My type of work made for a "Gypsy" mentality; 6 months maybe to a year,get new orders and move on,been around the World a few times; Thailand(3 bases) Panama,California(2 bases) seems I find someone nice,and the curse of new orders would happen. After about 3 of there occurrences,I gave up....
I suppose I tolerate being alone,better than most,for the 8 years during my two Air Force enlistments(1966-1974),I did not seek a permanent relationship with a Woman due to the very transient type of work I did (Aircraft weapons systems)and seeing how the senior enlisted men, were having to pull their kids out of schools uprooting stability they had(if briefly),so I promised myself to not get too involved. I left a trail of broken hearts in my travels,bruising mine at the same time.
Yes,Christmas time is for family's and children,us older Widowers look back to happier times,but the clock of life only advances,no resets or "Do overs".......