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it's the day after Christmas. some of us were lonely,and some of us were with loved ones. Does the holiday bring out the best in couples or the worst ? What was your experience

Kojaksmom 8 Dec 26
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17 comments

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1

It's chaos. It's a time of doing all kinds of superatitious obligations where everyone elses expectations are prioritized. Then I go back to being ignored and marginalized. Great.

Kintaro Level 6 Jan 5, 2019
1

I spent xmas dinner with Christian couple. He was drunk she was apologizing and forgives him

1

This season was all family. Parents getting older and teens testing limits.
What is this word, "couple"?

Yeah, I vaguely remember.

2

The first holiday season (Thanksgiving thru New Year's Eve) that we spent away from family and friends was as festive as I could make it - my husband said he wasn't used to holidays being quiet like that and he seemed a little disappointed. Now- some 30 plus holiday seasons later, he complains if he has to see anyone - go anywhere, etc etc. ????? If I ever needed a reason to simply "carry on" and not listen to the complaining from the peanut gallery, this seems like one. πŸ™‚πŸ˜‰

Lavergne Level 8 Dec 28, 2018
1

I have had wonderful holidays and some that weren’t so wonderful. I don’t believe there is an answer to whether holidays bring out the best or worst in couples. I think folks are going to be folks and if it happens to be the holiday then it’s probably just a coincidence.

Tom08030 Level 5 Dec 27, 2018
1

For me I was with loved ones but lonely. I guess it depends on the couple. My sister in-law and her husband got into a disagreement this Christmas. He got a gift card and decided to give it to someone else. She found out about it and she got pissed. She marched off. They were silent to each other the rest of the time I was there. It was sad.

Sorry you're having such a bad experience .family could sometimes suck. Perhaps the idea of Christmas brings unrealistic expectations for all of us.

@Kojaksmom The sister in-laws issues were her own but my own are what made me feel lonely. My spouse and I are currently separated. We’ve been to one counseling session with another coming in a few weeks. Even then things are still up in the air. I live with constant uncertainty.

4

The holidays can trend to be more stressful, in my experience. I'm the guy who wants to help, yet am told "Here's how you can help, go drink some eggnog".

So this year, for the first time in 11 years, I cooked for myself. I watched what I wanted. I nurtured and nourished my self. I allowed my self to embrace being whole.

2

From my personal experience it was always neutral. It was a time for fighting by my parents because my mom spent all the money on gifts. Thank goodness there were no credit cards when I was growing up.

JackPedigo Level 9 Dec 26, 2018
4

When I was young & naive I was very emotional about Xmas. Then the cabbage patch craze hit & people were exhibiting behavior worthy of warfare. I wish it were not so but the birth of the prince of peace seems lost in this greedy gluttonous world.

Mooolah Level 8 Dec 26, 2018

I agree

2

If I was part of a couple, I could tell you...since I'm single (sort of seeing someone, but not in the same page)..I'm not sure.

Cabsmom Level 8 Dec 26, 2018
1

My type of work made for a "Gypsy" mentality; 6 months maybe to a year,get new orders and move on,been around the World a few times; Thailand(3 bases) Panama,California(2 bases) seems I find someone nice,and the curse of new orders would happen. After about 3 of there occurrences,I gave up....

Mike1947 Level 7 Dec 26, 2018
2

Not part of a "couple" but for me, no difference. A little time off work to work on projects at home but other then that, no difference.

4

For the past two years, I've spent the holidays alone. To me, it's just another day.

BlackDove Level 7 Dec 26, 2018

Me too!! I should have called you to talk!!

2

I had dinner at a Chinese restaurant with two friends who do not do x-mas (they are Jewish). It was nice. I don't get into this holiday business, which makes me a weirdo, a looney, a pervert, anti-American and a Communist. πŸ™‚

SKH78 Level 8 Dec 26, 2018

Single or married I've always had an unconventional Christmas. I know exactly how you feel

3

"What can't be cured must be endured" summed up my Xmas.

The holidays always magnified the fact that I was alone. It doesn't get easier as time goes on.

@Kojaksmom For me,had I married when I should have in my middle 20's (finally at 43)a wife kids, and by now i suppose,Grandkids,but I'm used to playing the cards that are dealt me in the game of life,missed chances,perhaps,not noticing the looks Women gave me of interest(I wonder ,where are they now?)

3

I don't think you can quantify that way. Each couple is different, each holiday is different.

8

I suppose I tolerate being alone,better than most,for the 8 years during my two Air Force enlistments(1966-1974),I did not seek a permanent relationship with a Woman due to the very transient type of work I did (Aircraft weapons systems)and seeing how the senior enlisted men, were having to pull their kids out of schools uprooting stability they had(if briefly),so I promised myself to not get too involved. I left a trail of broken hearts in my travels,bruising mine at the same time.

Yes,Christmas time is for family's and children,us older Widowers look back to happier times,but the clock of life only advances,no resets or "Do overs".......

Mike1947 Level 7 Dec 26, 2018
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