FWB...
My last possible fwb didn't work out. He wanted something that I wasn't. He wanted a dominatrix.
A DIFFERENT man I've know a couple months and I discussed the possibility of doing this. There is sexual chemistry there. However, I'm not romantically interested in him at all... which is exactly what I think would work in this scenario.
My hesitation is only this... that he will want more eventually. I guess it will take more discussion and if we go this route, very open communication.
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10 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.From my point of view a FWB relationship would only be possible with someone that didn't trigger that insanity of brain chemicals that we call "falling in love". I've had that happen and its probably the worst drug out there. Very addicting, and makes the brain play all kinds of tricks in order to get the next fix. And it can destroy your life when you get addicted to the wrong person, or wrong time, or some other "wrong".
At the right time it can cement two people together in a way that can help them successfully raise offspring, probably why evolution gifted us with this propensity. But it is an addiction that can strike at the worst of times...and the only way to deal with it is like dealing with an addiction. Don't feed your addiction, use the rational to try to reset the distortion that the brain chemicals cause... and give yourself time and distance.
Anyway...my fear around FWB. LOL.
Robeh
Level 4
Oct 29, 2019
0
You have to make sure it's someone your not romantically interested in.
To be a dominatrix is to be in control.
No soup for you......
moosepucky
Level 7
Oct 22, 2019
0
I'm not cut out to be a dominatrix. I had a guy that wanted to be my dom, but he wanted to call me "baby girl" and I was to call him "daddy". That is a hard stop for me. That is just a bucket of cold water for me.
HippieChick58
Level 9
Sep 28, 2019
1
Communication is key. Become friends first to ensure you will both be comfortable with each other. Feelings do not have to ruin the arrangement, you can care about somebody without escalating to a romantic relationship.
JenBeberstein
Level 8
Sep 28, 2019
1
You need to be open and honest with yourself through the process and let him know he can be open and honest with you... for me personally FWBs works since I keep a barrier in place and compartmentalize relationships... but if the guy catches feelings and does not tell me that becomes a problem.... because then the only reason he is continuing the FWBs is because he is hoping it will flip into a relationship eventually... what I do is initiate these convos since if I left it up to the guy we'd never have those hard convos! hehe
demifeministgal
Level 8
Sep 27, 2019
3
That could happen with any FWB relationship, that one could end up wanting more than the other wants it to go. Set your boundaries and stick to them and have fun.
Mermaidfantasy
Level 7
Sep 27, 2019
3
Being a dom ensures your needs with be met... What issues do you have with it? Just curious...
Cutiebeauty
Level 9
Sep 27, 2019
0
I'm not into controlling, punishing, demanding, in the way a dom does. He wants to be told when to cum. He wants to be punished. That's not my thing.
@Cabsmom ah, I see... I must've confused the term with dom as in dominant... I'm a dom in this sense... No punishing or pain or control... I just insist on certain things in certain ways... He accommodates as do I...
It's not an issue anyway. That's not the man I'm considering.
@Cutiebeauty yeah dominatrix is a different level
Yes if you go that route you will have to go for some very open communication ,find out exactly what he is looking for,that is a very broad field to role play ,plus you will need to give it some serious thought of what you are looking to get out of it and the positive benefits for you It is a lot of work until you get into to be a dom,,much easier to be a sub,,So you must make sure you have some very positive benefits whether mental or physical as he is turn contol of himself over to you ,Thats why you need a serious discussion as some times 2 or 3 times and he could be satisfied and have that off his bucket list,,but some people have wonderful positive relationships also good luck
RoyMillar
Level 9
Sep 27, 2019
0
No... that man and I aren't talking about it. I'm not into being a dominatrix or being dominated.
It's a different guy.
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