It's frightening how many people out there have ulterior motives and no interest in a relationship.

i agree with you yes

but i do have this bad hanit of when some one is nic e to me i start thinking what do they want

i have found me i know know who i am today

stil have those walls and i feel that is one reason i ma still alone for now have to learn to allow a few people in

well she came back and was asking for more help and i told her that i do not have extra and will not help her so now she does not speak to me which is a good thing

@lost good decision.. If anyone just wants your money, it's a bad sign.

i do not judge all women because of some bad relationship as i know they are not all the same abd there are some very good ones out there and that is what i do hope to find one

The only problem with that logic is that most women who’ve taken time off work to raise kids haven’t had the benefit of uninterrupted income earning. And in cases of divorce, women typically come out worse off financially than their ex husbands.

@UUNJ i agree with you uunj and there is also a situation were a person worked extra hard for most of his life so much that the dody started to break down and is forced ro retire early and made to live on a very small lension just enough to rent a room ( toronto prices ) and buy food have local transit and have just over to maybe go to macdonalds for a once a month lunch but they atill judge you as not worthy society of today hase become very materialestic they want things not love

and i want to be able to trust

than you and yes s they saw my weakness and pounced on it
i had just started to let the walls down and they forced those walls up agian but the walls are down now and i am very cautous any more

for a relationship there has to be trust

@lost
Not true universally.

1. Yes to some but not to others. One shoe does not fit all.
2. All relationships are transactional. The only, yes the only exception of a selfless relationship and love is mother's and father's. A relationship is nothing more than a transactional agreement of - I make you happy, you make me happy. Nothing more.
3. We often romanticize a relationship. Especially the kids who grew up on fairy tales. Women and men have the Cinderella syndrome well into their old age. A very few are pragmatic.
4. There are many people with many aspirations in this world of 7 billion people. Everyone who is in a relationship is not in love and vice versa.
5. Most problems start with incorrect expectations.
6. Some of the best relationships are friendships with no expectations. Just good people, good hearts.
7. All or nothing in a relationship is a bad approach. A smart approach is pick the best in every situation, person, place etc. A life's journey is really cherry picking. That is what we all do in life, just don't admit it.
8. At this stage, nobody is going to be dedicated to us. Everybody has a life, kids, grandkids, jobs, bad experiences and are gun shy. Everything will take time
9. People sometimes leave because we don't have what they need. We can learn from experiences
10. We should understand why people want relationships. Not everyone is straight. Some need dependencies, a rescue, support, help in old age, a solution to loneliness, sex, or a better life they cannot have on own. But some mask it as love, liking etc. It is often mixed with other motives.

Someone like I can be happy with a great companion who can laugh with me, share stories, enjoy beautiful things in life like movies, restaurants, travel etc. Sex is not necessary and finances will not be mixed. Trust increases every day and behavior improves accordingly. We can decide to continue or we can decide to break away. I will not be heart broken. I am nice and gentlemanly but I am not emotional. I am having the best time of my life.

But do what is important to you.

@St-Sinner nicely broken down

@St-Sinner T.H.I.S.! Thank you for spelling it out so clearly.