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This is a little scattered but it all ties together for me and I think it will for others but in different ways. I believe in safe sex and good hygiene generally but I have never worn a condom when oral sex was performed on me and was never asked to. I have never seen a dental damn outside a professional health setting and my emotional reaction that it feels weird and prudish completely overrides any fear of disease. This ties into why casual sex doesn't work for me, I hate and fear having "the talk" so much it's not going to happen until I'm totally smitten and dying for sex. Oral sex is a big milestone for me, eating a random pussy is weird and gross so a barrier won't come up and if I'm in love it's too wonderful to have anything in the way. I think this relates to how women feel about cockshots (and I agree) a penis (or a pussy) is only beautiful when it's attached to the right person.

Buttercup 8 June 4
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3 comments

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1

Having read your bio I can understand your need for optimum sensation. You were presumably sacrificed to your parent's religious beliefs at an early age. It is in my opinion the greatest betrayal imposed upon any person when they are in most need of protection. If you have not already read this young woman's very erudite blog please do so and allow any lingering cognitive dissonance to be removed. [madsciencewriter.blogspot.co.id]
@UUNJ's mandatory advice for humanity will be well heeded for everyone's sake particularly your partner and future sexual partners in your advertised "open relationship".

FrayedBear Level 9 June 5, 2018

@UUNJ advice is sound but not new to me, I'm in healthcare and there is a huge disconnect between best practice and actual compliance.Do you always use barriers or exchange current STI panels prior to sex? Almost no one gets tested for HPV and few for HSV2, both very transmissible via oral to genital contact.

@Buttercup HPV is so prevalent thru skin to skin contact that prevention is a challenge. And men can’t be screened for it anyway. At least the vaccine available now will help decrease cancer risk from some strains of it. Internal (aka female) condoms afford more protection from herpes (both types) but they are expensive unless a provider writes a script. And there is an even greater hurdle because it’s unfamiliar. So yes, there is a disconnect between recommendations and practice, but it behooves everyone to know their health status, communicate it to partners, and make risk-aware decisions. It would be unethical to toss up our hands and say “It’s hopeless.” Much depends on how the education is delivered, too. I ask people to consider non-latex gloves and lube to be sexual pleasure aids that also decrease exposure to STIs.

2

I'm not necessarily a huge fan of these things either and casual sex doesn't interest me, but for my safety and the safety of other partners, it's protection or routine STI testing.

5

There are condoms made of poly isoprene that are very thin and heat conducting. Put lube on before the condom and you can have a nearly-bare sensation. Lube between vulva and dam also increases pleasure. Antibiotic-resistant chlamydia and gonorrhea are increasing dramatically; know the risks and make decisions accordingly.

UUNJ Level 8 June 4, 2018

I'm pretty good on theory, not practice and my partners(small sample admittedly) agree. Our precautions get very lax when it comes to oral. Porn too, I am confident I've never seen a dental dam ever.

@Buttercup Porn performers are paid more if they don’t use barriers. They are also STI tested weekly. They do a lot of things in porn that wouldn’t be safe or pleasurable in real life, but that’s OK because it’s adult entertainment, not education.

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