I think you are right. If it gave her some peace to do this, ok. Too bad it was at your expense, but it achieved nothing but her peace - and she was upset. I think you are going too far, maybe, not letting her see your child - her grandchild? -. You are punishing her for upsetting you.
Let her see your child, but with conditions. No religious views, information, talks - anything! or Then she will be disconnected for good.
You respected her views, she should respect yours.

Not saying I believe in God or anything because I'm an agnostic, but when you saying there is no God, is very uneducated, and your opinion. There is no proof to say yes or no. As of right now all we can say is who knows, until we have the proof. So saying there is no God just isn't right, just as saying there is a God. We honestly don't know. So how about we just say, we'll find out someday and until then I'll continue being a scientist and using the available data, not assumptions.

By the same criteria saying there is no Santa Claus is uneducated and my opinion. I don't think there is any problem at all moving forward with the belief there is no God. It's not even unscientific.

It is theoretically true that there is a 1:999,999 999 . . . chance there is some sort of supreme being, but there is no evidence at all of such a thing and speculating that there might be is pointless and superstitious. What good can come from debating the very remote possibility?

@Wellnowbub Can't say that leprechauns and unicorns aren't real, either, then. I mean, we just don't know. Right?

@MollyBell I'm not exactly sure what your point is with that? Just because we haven't discovered it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Unicorns and Leprechauns are names we've given things, that actually did exist. They aren't the things we read about in kids books, but they did exist. Again, they weren't magical or whatever but fossils have been found and people just use their imagination to make them more exciting. Elasmotherium sibiricum is the unicorn, and leprechauns are just a different evolutionary variation of us, only smaller. We weren't the only humanoid being to evolve. Without the technology or understanding of science that we have now days, people still found fossils, but were forced to come up with other ideas about their origins. I'm an astronomer/mathematician so I totally understand your point, but there is a lot of stuff we haven't discovered yet and a lot that we don't know. I personally believe there is no god and we are here by chance, but for me to say 100% god doesn't exist is still the same faith someone has by saying god does exist. We know a good amount about the universe, but there is still A LOT we don't know or understand. I just don't like to take such a hard stance on a topic when I can't prove why or how.

@MollyBell As long as something doesn't outright break the laws of physics, why can't it be possible? The universe is a very very big place and a lot of strange things happen out there. To think life must resemble us in any way, just isn't right. But, this is why the whole God argument is tricky. Because he would break the laws of physics, but then religious people claim well he made them so why can't he break them, or the what about before the Big Bang, blah blah..and there is the yup, you're right. I can not say what happened before that. I can say, however, with the current laws of Quantum Mechanics, as we understand them, the universe was bound to eventually happen, including us. Which is enough for me. We can explain how the universe began and how we came to be, but why? Hell I don't know why, lol. I don't really care why. That's for the theologians and philosophers. All I know is I don't need a god to tell me how I got here. And the why isn't important to me, because I think there is no why. We're here just due to a roll of the cosmic die. But if you, or someone, needs to know how and why, it's not my place to interfere with their existential dilemma. Unless they try saying the earth is 6k years old and such. But I don't think just because someone is religious, or what have you, I should get mad. Just don't try to cram god down my throat. You have your beliefs and I have mine. It's the same with my friends and I. I just know some topics not to touch.

My position is, from a scientific standpoint, there absolutely isn't a god, and no reason to begin to hypothesize that there is. So, I don't believe in Zeus. Or Apollo. Or any other gods. I won't be budging from this opinion until there is actually ANY reason to believe they exist aside from "We can't explain how this all came about, therefore, it must be (insert absurd BS and dogma here)."

@Wellnowbub, Leprechauns and unicorns? Oh, my!

They have found both fossils and various animals around today that may have been mistaken, (Keyword); for unicorns. Most of the previous types of humanoids did sometimes co-exist for brief periods, but they weren't that much smaller in size.

I think you might want to go back and read up a little more.

@Angelface which is exactly what I said. They were fossils of things that got mistaken, but people used their imaginations to make them into other things like unicorns (again, not saying unicorns actually existed, but a creature did exist with a horn jutting out of its nose, and people then began thinking up things like unicorns). They are derived from actual animals. And there have been fossils of Humanoids that reached no more than 3 feet tall which could explain the other part. So all I've been trying to say is there is a lot of weird stuff out there and not all of it makes sense, sometimes we understand it later and sometimes not, and people tend to make theories then try to make the evidence fit rather then let the evidence tell the story. Other than that all I'm saying is if it's possible by the laws of physics, its naive to believe it doesn't exist just because we haven't found it yet. My whole stance, which got completely blown up, is I tend to not take a "stance" of 100% yes or no, unless it can be proven. Otherwise it's just mental masterbation on who's right because there always becomes a point in the argument where someone will go, "ya well prove it" and there is our problem lol.. Do I believe in a God? I would say, God probably doesn't exist and I'm completely comfortable with the notion of no God and couldn't really care either way. But do I get upset at someone or think they are dumb for having a belief? Absolutely not. If that is what you need to help with your existential, more power to you. But, I find it just wrong to say, there is no god! and youre a dumbass for thinking there is one!...lol, This whole thread was about someone being upset because their father was baptized on his death bead and he was an atheist. Just don't think I would let that anger me. His wife obviously did it for her personal reason and it was her way of dealing with grief. Did this literally in any way harm anyone? Or did it just bring a little peace to an elder grieving woman? I think the best way for believers and us nonbelievers to get along is for one of our sides to be the adults, and just let some of this shit slide man. I mean, it's not like any of us are going to make it out alive anyways? But hey thank you for your advice. As the great NDT once said "The universe is under no obligation to make sense to you"

This was a really odd direction for this conversation to go. It's all split off from my original comment where I said "since there is no God". But I don't believe nor was I implying that anybody was dumb for believing in God. That would be pretty hypocritical of me since it wasn't that long ago that I believe in God. I don't want to alienate anyone but I thought I was pretty safe on an agnostic site putting forth the claim that there is no God. I don't think you have to be 100% certain to move forward with your life as if that claim is true. And the fact of the matter is there is no good evidence that any God exists.

But I said all of this to support the same conclusion that you came to. At the end of the day no one was listening anyway so it doesn't matter who his wife is praying to. My whole point was that it doesn't matter enough to worry about.

@MollyBell I'm not a 'religionist' but do believe in God (Divine intelligence, Creator, etc.). And from an actual scientific standpoint, there is no evidence available to say otherwise. The issue lays in how could you have proof through the 'scientific method' so to speak. However, I had an NDE (near-death experience) when I was 20, and I clearly realized that there was much more to this 'reality' than I could possibly comprehend. I was a Christian at the time, but already was having doubts about the 'religious' aspects. My experience was teaching me that there was much to question as well as to experience, and i drifted away the church. I've since come to a place of great peace and harmony, which provides a deeper knowing that comes with experience. So, as to you might discover the 'reality' of a great 'Consciousness' than yourself is dependent on what levels of action you choose to take. I'd also as life happens, much will come to you... The ancient gods like Zeus and Apollo were expressions of the 'one' creator and all part of the 'whole' as quantum field theory brings into play. You'll mostly find answers in you engage with other people, be it child or someone on their 'death bed'...as they say, 'the game is on'

@MollyBell, @Mightyjustice I'd first have to say that for someone to declare that "since there is no God", is to be challenged. Simply because of "how do you know?" and what evidence can you provide to support this assertion? The question becomes whose God did you stop believing in, for there are many different perceptions/beliefs about what is God and how does he/she express themselves in ways that make sense. If you're agnostic, then you're just stating, basically, that you don't really know whether or not there is a god.

Then you state, "And the fact of the matter is there is no good evidence that any God exists" and how would you know that as a fact? What has been your experience in testing out that idea? What other beliefs have you linked/associated with what you perceived God to be and how he/she was supposed to act for you to be your 'god'?

What you'll find among the 'seekers' is the desire to make 'connection'. That is found in 'spiritual practices' like meditation and other forms. Ask those who practice as to the nature of their experience. It's hard to come to a bonafide conclusion if you haven't done some serious research/seeking...

@MollyBell, @Mightyjustice, @TWDay It's just theoretically true that there is a 1:2 chance of there being a 'supreme being/consciousness'. There is an infinite amount of anecdotal evidence that has been collected in many ways to form different belief systems; each can be challenged in one sense simply because their perspectives are filtered through culture. I have direct evidence (IMO) because of having a unique NDE that has been corroborated by many others of different and similar experiences. Being a seeker is what draws in both experience and information to make more informed decisions/hypotheses that define your own journey. So, I'm saying that a great deal of good can come and has come from not just debating this possibility but allowing yourself to gain more experience

She has not been a good person to myself or my son so this isn't the only reason we no longer speak

@SunnySmiles Good... protect your son... that is your job as his mom... do not let people who have never had the misfortune of having to cut out toxic fam members shame or guilt you into breaking your no contact.... I support and sadly, understand your decision.

Well he had a 3 yr diagnosis and had time to plan everything just as he wanted. I don't believe she followed thru on a single wish of his

Sunny, that's sad. I sense your pain.

I'm very sorry for your loss hun

I agree with you; if an all-knowing God exists, it surely knows why we don't believe — and what it would take to change each of our minds.

I'm very sorry for your recent loss, and I hope you have the love and support in your life to help you heal.

She probably paid for it though.

Actually, I think that stuff is free...though most people probably make a donation.

Obviously she was not making any effort to be a StepMom dis-respecting you and your father slithering into his deathbed with an imaginary alleged baby god geebush geehobah ghostHoles. ....hopefully you retrieved momentos from your father's estate photos a reading lamp he read to you with a blanket you knitted for him .....things she has no right to keep or dispose of. .... cherish your memories retell family stories for grandchildren to cherish and keep clear of the invader clergy to your family with the hell threats heaven bribes all fiction like the do nothing gawd gott who let a liar violate the ethical intellectual space of your daddy Atheist honest about all fake faiths

@SunnySmiles hoping time has improved matters concerning your Atheist family of 3 generations spoiled by the xian wife & her cultist ...my remarks above are for all inspired by your lovely story how YOU carry on your dad's honorable Atheism

I don't think it is harmless.

I don't think it is harmless.

Kids don't have "needs" for grandparents... there are many kids out there who's grandparents are all dead or live overseas with no contact or are orphans of the state and never had parents, let alone grandparents. I think that belief is false.

Sunny this is laughable. You say your an atheist? Tell me why it would upset you if Grumpy stole Snow White's roller skates. It's all in your mind. Don't be upset.

I agree... I am agnostic and my sister believers in supernatural stuff but is not religious and we gave our mother (ugh) a catholic funeral by the book... we even had to rush it cuz catholics don't do funerals during easter time (idiots) and she died really close to Easter...We did not believe in what she did, but we honoured her belief system... which is more that I can say for her if the roles had been reversed and she had to plan a non religious funeral for either of us.

I'm so sorry hun

Thank you hun

Oh she was a terrible person. We no longer speak for a million reasons.

Only reason i would go to church would be for community. But would be one that is open minded and not pushy

You are correct. She was never a good person to me or any of my family. She was not a good person at all

Oh huni I am so sorry! What a terrible person she is! I hope you also are able to find peace with all that. Sad emoji

That's a really interesting point of view, that's how i think we should all feel about a thing like this. But i can't help feeling annoyed by her stepmother taking this religious "advantage" in a sick mind.

So sad. I'm sorry hun

I like this. I was always taught that funerals and wakes were for the survivors anyway, a moment to say goodbye the best way they can and to remember who that person was. The body is a shell after death. Nothing done at that point affects the deceased in any way, shape or form. Whatever those still living have to do and whatever they have to say to let go should be respected and honored. If we cannot respect each other then how can we even begin to expect the same in return?

BTW she had it done out of a place of love I'm sure. Or of deep fear that she would not see him again if he weren't baptized. So realize she has her superstitions and needed to do this so that she wouldn't have to live with guilt.

What next life? He's dead.

No this was a very selfish act on the part of the wife. She did not respect her husbands wishes, she imposed her beliefs for her own selfish peace of mind. I would hate to think, should I get dementia that someone would baptise me. My children know that any of my organs are to be donated. I would hate my wishes overrided by someone else's philosophy.

Also if she was a good mother and you love her and you allow this to destroy your relationship with her then you will have lost two parents instead of one