Agnostic.com

117 205

God hates porn?

VictoriaNotes 9 Mar 24

Post a comment Reply Add Photo

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

117 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

4

Perfect! ?

10

Come to think of it,I was taught in Catholic school that he does see all.

sloryd Level 7 Mar 24, 2018

@Katastrophe1969 No wonder I felt so sinful back then!

12

This hypothetical God hypothetically made sex AND sex drive. "He" programmed most men to be easily stimulated by visual imagery. I wonder why "he" set men up to sin like that. Hmm...

@irascible He's not sexist, he sends us all to hell

God damn it I'm so horny all the time. Sorry God, didn't mean to blaspheme over how you made me.

@JustChris I think God needs to check out the variety of porn available online. Every weirdo has a choice nowadays.

Yes, Mike, but it's a two-way street. Ever see a female macaque in heat. She parades herself with raised rump in front of the nearing group of males and they act like college kids at a football game when their team scores a touchdown. Human ladies are menstrual, but the rest of the mammal world is estival. That's even worse.

8

I am not so sure that evangelicals are that opposed to porn. I mean they aren't vocal about it. But I recall someone who was born again and again giving in to lustful feelings periodically or should I say frequently. Each time she did, she went back to a bible meeting and got saved again. As I recall when the PTL (aka Jim and Tammie Baker) was still going, they advocated that sexual activity was healthy and that christians should be partaking of it. Of course Jim ended up taking too much of his own advice.

Every evangelical I ever visited had at least one porn tape in the back if the vcr cabinet. And, usually, in a kid's movie cover. I made a habit of placing them in their "donation" box that they kept by the front door.

@Bierbasstard That is too funny. Why didn't I ever think of that

@lbusche I went to a wedding down in Va (my gf was cousin of the bride and photographer), this little isolated town right near Richmond. The Mayor/church leader ran the only gas station with a little video rental spot in the corner. They wouldn't let us sleep in a guest bedroom because that would be an "abomination before the lord" so we chose to sleep on the floor in the basement family room. I found a bunch above mentioned items in their "collection".

I found some wedding gift wrap and wrapped a few of them up and put a tag that said, "to be watched together on your wedding night".

There's so much more to this story that would make you feel queasy. They were very inhospitable. Mind you, I looked like the long hair pic of me at the time but damn... Lol

Yes, Rev. Jim Bakker enjoyed Jessica Hawn, after slipping a mickey into her drink to "persuade" her to give him pleasure. He also had other woman. Do as I say, not as I do, if you do as I do, I'll punish you!

11

God created sex. Lol. I like the cute characters.

11

No God, No Hate - Know God, Know Hate

46

Why don't Baptists make love standing up?
.
.
.
.
They don't want God to think they're dancing.

Hahahaha

That's a good one!

Baptists don't recognize each other in liquor stores or adult book stores.

4

He really does that? Lol

7

Wow - this gives a new significance to the second coming! Ewww, Pat Robertson and Jimmy Swaggert doing the deed - together? You know, it just occured to me that God committed suicide - maybe he can create porn so bad, even he doesn't want to watch it.

jeffy Level 7 Mar 24, 2018

What's white and flies across the sky?

The Cumming Of The Lord.

(I thought this was hilarious when I was 13.)

@pepperjones I never thought of that

god committing suicide - i like the theory ... & then he/she/it gets punished for this mortal (!) sin in eternal purgatory or what?

@walklightly Just had a stray thought - just before I read this post, it occurred to me the crucifixion was fundamentally a suicide. So my twisted mind synthesized God watching porn with an alternative motive - other than he died for our sins. Basically, he couldn't stand us anymore and wanted to get the fuck out? Seems more plausible 🙂.

2

Adam and Eve were naked in the garden.

😮

4

I could definitely think God would be all for porn, especially normal porn, so nothing involving torture and beating each other up before you do it

If the Bible is anything to go by, he probably loves involving torture and beating each other up before they do it.

Well yes thats true if it was written by a God??

@ScienceBill72 😉

4

Really? because adult male otters will steal baby harbour seal pups and rape them until they die.

I swear they told me they were 18.

12

He/she/it is responsible for sex throughout the ages, the disciples have been fucking us over, in his/hers/its name, since the dawn of time 🙂

ipdg77 Level 8 Mar 24, 2018
2

He jumped a virgin when she was sleeping (isn't that rape?) and his son hung out with hookers, so I don't think he's too worried about it. If he created everything, then he must have created porn.

It's a great comeback to the pious who are probably wanking anyway.

10

As a holy man, I actually blessed masturbation.

Not much of a story, just an explanation. To my knowledge, to bless something means to take what used to be considered bad, and recognize it as now being considered good. Masturbation used to be considered a sin, but it has wellness benefits, so it must be good. Therefore, I blessed it.

@Katastrophe1969 @FurNFeatherMama are you sure? Masturbation blessings stories are better told behind closed doors 😉

Oh, y'all wanna know about the ceremony. There wasn't one. Should we have one?

11

That must be what makes those religious nit wits so twitchy. LOL

LOL

Those religious nitwits are so twitchy because of the severe suppression of sexuality ... and their twitchyness comes out - just look at the christian family values dudes like Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Bakker, Ted Haggard, Larry Craig and all the other christian men who get caught with their pants down.

2

And l thought l was just being paranoid when l felt like someone was watching me have sex. It would probably be more interesting for him if l had a partner. I know it would be more interesting for me.

17

I have to say that the very notion of an omnipresent peep show divinity is hilarious.

4

I certainly hope he hates porn. I'm not looking to watch internet porn with an omnipresent dude who's totally into it.

Oh come on, where is your sense of adventure?

It gives a new meaning to on the right hand of god. Or maybe he uses his left hand.

2

I'm safe, unless He is into "solo" action.

3

Where is the sketch pad? Nothing like a progressive drawing.

4

Even if we assume there is "God", I am absolutely convinced that He/She/It does not care about porn at all.

Convinced, eh? Lol

Why would he not care about one of his/her many wonderful creations? Porn being one.

2

Given that all the other mammals "go at it" just like us, that us human mammals were around 100,000 years+ before there was a bible, and that the bible contains parent-child incest, condones bride-price, is full of misogyny, and some its most revered figures had multiple wives, I fail to see how there would be any objection on moral grounds, but only because the sky Don wasn't calling the shots.

4

Come on folks, we invented what we call god. We have been inventing it since our brains realized that we are mortals. Until around 2000 years ago we had a stew pot full of gods, one for every purpose. people were having a hard time even remembering their names Then came a guy and decided to put them all into one basket. That made things much easier for everyone. Hey, they would have to remember only one name. Of course we also invented the porn too because it wasn't quite enough doing the sex act, we wanted to watch it being performed by others too as a specialized entertainment. So, since we consider ourselves a spitting image of god, I am positive god loves porn just as much as he/she loves violence, injustice, famine, destruction and whole bunch ot other stuff.

"Come on folks, we invented what we call god."

😮 Say it ain't so. 😮

8

and have you seen some of the flowers he has come up with?

obscene!

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:42708
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.