Agnostic.com

48 2

What do you think of backward ball caps on older men?

This guy, 62, sent me a lame, canned message on Fitness Singles. With just a high school diploma, he lives in rural, northeast Washington State. A retired mechanic.

I think he looks like a redneck idiot with his ball cap backward. It looks immature.

With a master degree, I want a man with a college degree. Well-educated men are more intelligent and better conversationalists, in my experience.

Intelligence and kindness are important to me in choosing a mate.

Your thoughts?

LiterateHiker 9 Feb 22
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

48 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

3

I agree with you. For the record here I do not wear hats. Several places I worked at tried to give us hats but I do not like them. A former boss who actually taught me computer in my home told a story once on coming over to teach me and there I was drunk with my hat on backwards. It's not true and I do not wear hats.

15

Things that matter; honesty, integrity, caring, loving loyal, open, sensitive, intelligence non-judgemental and a few more.

Things that don't matter; everything on your list.

And I have a masters degree.

I think I love you!

12

Well, I love the ball cap look. I love baseball so maybe that's why. And mechanics with high school degrees are not necessarily uneducated or bad conversationalists. I can't fix anything so mechanics seem pretty smart to me 🙂 I have 2 masters degrees.

12

I have many with masters and doctorates that are a terrible fit and others that are intelligent, fun and have no degree, but are life long learners.
Sometimes we interpret things, such as a backwards baseball cap as a red neck or one of less intelligence. when it is just a guy wearing his cap backwards. We make shit up all the time based on the past and from our world view, it isn't true.
I like to just meet people, and be present to who they are, curious about their experiences in life and shut off the running commentary in my head that keeps me from being present with another human being, like it is the last human interaction I may have.

9

I think you cannot judge a book by its cover.

I have a Masters degree, and on occasion, I will wear a ballcap backwards. Not only that, I don't always dress up as a "refined" man. I wear worn clothing often... Judging by my appearance, no one would ever deem me as "successful". And that's the idea. People need to learn of me for who I am, not how I can afford to dress.

In my experience people like you (based on this post) look "refined" even if they have just mowed the lawn, fixed their car, whatever. You can just tell.

@Mitch07102 The Right Clothes, but especially clothes that fit make a huge difference.....and don't ask me about brand name clothes....I concentrate on what fits (tall & thin here).

I must mention that I do dress for the occasion - and do look respectful when I am mingling with society.

8

It’s quite common for mechanics to wear their hat backwards at work. The hat helps with keeping the hair clean. The bill of the cap becomes a hindrance when working in tight quarters.

I tend to look at a person’s educational background on dating sites, but I find what they actually write is far more revealing about their intellect.
Education does expose people to a variety of experiences which may you might find more appealing, but don’t be too hasty in judging a book by its cover.

So do catchers in Ball games ,they wear their baseball caps back wards , Does this mean they have two correct ways to be worn?

8

I like to wear my cap with the front facing forward, to shade my eyes from the sun. I really don't care how others wear theirs. 🙂

Sun on the back of the neck is not good too ... or is it?

@Mcflewster Not good. I don't want to look like a redneck. 😀

8

It's a must when catching.

Best response yet.

@Deb57 TY

8

I don't (give a rat's fanny about ANY type of hat on any aged person). Nothing about hats is innately tied to age. Drawing such conclusions is a choice about something purely arbitrary and, frankly, meaningless.

If it helps keep hyper-judgemental people away, however, I might want to dig up some caps to wear myself. (;

Zster Level 8 Feb 23, 2020
6

On a younger guy it would look silly to me because I don't think that's a thing right now. I think it looks good on him. I don't think a forward one would look good either.

I think the education thing is situational. Some well educated people are self righteous and condescending. There are alot of people who have worked their whole lives and have varied worldly experience than some well educated people. Much rather be around a restaurant worker than an office manager for instance. (No offense to any office managers I'm sure you are wonderful and interesting)

MsAl Level 8 Feb 23, 2020
6

I don't have a master's degree but I've written 2 capstones for people that now have them. That doesn't mean I'm as smart or smarter than the degree holders. It means I can write fairly well.

I don't think it makes any difference what we say because you have already made up your mind that he is not for you. I also think you are right because you know what you want.

6

Wow, how interesting that the baseball cap, facing either way, inspires such strong feelings in people! I wonder if it's a generational thing, or a regional one, or something else?

Perhaps, @literatehiker, it's representational to you of a less educated person, and that's why it's a turnoff for you?

6

I work with two people who dropped out of high school, one got an GED the other not. The one who got the GED is an autodidact, really smart and can hold a conversation with no problem. The other is one of the best woodworkers I have known, has run his own business and has three daughters one of whom is working on a Ph.D. in Oceanography. Both are smart just got tired of the race to?

6

Even a man with a Master's degree can be relaxed enough to wear a ball cap, even backwards. I'm not pretentious enough to find this a turn off. I like a relaxed casual guy. And I have a Master's degree.

I am with you on that. I have a masters too, and learned stuff. but being in life and with people way that are different than me has enriched me far more and without student loan debt.

5

I don't automatically judge someone's intelligence or knowledge based upon their level of education. I know a couple of doctorate holding idiots, and I know some brilliant people who never finished college. Integrity and interpersonal skills matter more to me that formal education, and it is possible to educate oneself to the point that once can comfortably navigate in an environment fraught with post grads. I'm proof of that.

Deb57 Level 8 Feb 23, 2020

And backward baseball caps look silly on everybody. Again, the only judgment it would lead me to make about the person is that their taste is very different from my own.

5

What do you think of backward ball caps on older men?

This is, actually, the first time I've ever thought about it. Going back to apathy on the subject.

1of5 Level 8 Feb 23, 2020
5

What age must you have attained when it is necessary to wear the cap in the conventional manner?

5

If you are going to wear a ball cap backwards as a fashion statement, it should be sized and have a logo. This is obviously a casual shot showing the subject in an active situation. (You did say a fitness singles. ) Assume it's for Sun protection or to keep hair out of the way. Maybe he just wants to show himself in the casual fitness mode. Possibly ask for a more formal picture. I'm not sure checking out the Fitness Singles pages are your best choice for determining the intelligence level of men or women. People will present differently in varied situations.

It just occurred to me that wearing it forward would have obscured his face; if he removed it completely, he would have had hat hair at best

5

He's a "toys r us kid ".. He doesn't want to grow up.. 😊😜

5

It seems like the problem really isn't the baseball cap.

4

Its been ages since you publicslly shamed a man for wanting to go out on a date, especially with you. Those posts always get lots of responses, so thanks for contributing to the sustainability of the site.

4

Excuse me...but when I read your above heading I thought for a moment you were referring to some strange new fashion that I hadn’t heard of...namely testicle covers! Just my British sense of humour I think, as in the UK these caps are never called ‘ball” caps, but baseball caps! 😁

4

Absurd.
Headgear should be worn properly, and only when appropriate. I become irritated when I see men wearing hats while seated in restaurants, or inside in the presence of ladies. The only acceptable time to wear a cover indoors is when one is "on duty". I thank my father for teaching me, among other "manly" things, how to shoot, sail, and properly wear a hat.

Excellent answer bigpaw!

@bigpawbullets

Well said.

4

Too Silly
[bing.com]

3

This is a really trivial criteria on which to judge a man, LH. You're evaluating an entire person based on how he wears his hat? By that you can tell he's uneducated and a poor conversationalist? He might be but the only reasonable stance to take is to withhold judgment until you actually speak with him for maybe 20 mins so there's a foundation on which to base your appraisal.

After that, you have every right to judge him.

3

Whatever!!! It's your choice to use like that.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:462841
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.