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Relationship Worries

I'm dating a great Christian guy. He is Anglican. I feel worried that it will bother him that I'm agnostic. Sometimes I feel like I don't believe in God at all. I guess I just have never been that religious. I feel so alone. I love this guy and I'm afraid he will break up with me over this. I once told a guy I dated that I struggle with my faith and he broke up with me. I feel so hurt and betrayed by Christians. They preach love but it's all conditional. I feel like maybe all Christians will act this way. What sucks is that I have fallen in love with one. Any advice?

Cat567 2 Aug 21
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As a former Anglican I can attest to the comparative liberalness of the tribe but in the end I think the core differences between a “believer” and the other will eventually cause more friction than you may want in a very serious relationship. Just an assumption on my part… every situation is it’s own ballgame, so to speak. Good luck.

Davekp Level 8 Aug 24, 2022

You are torn. Christian are not torn. They are firm in their stupid primitive beliefs. But if you stay the path, you will feel the freedom for the rest of your life. You will begin choosing wisely.

St-Sinner Level 9 Aug 22, 2022

You're "dating" a religious person?

You need to sit down and have a serious talk with him

You might have found a great lover...but you didn't find a person who thinks like you....

...and that's so important.

HippyChick58 sums it up well...IMO.

Here's two memes for you to "think about"

Robecology Level 9 Aug 22, 2022

What seems like 'love' (often just lust) today can be a source of frustration in the future. Beliefs are a major source of connection in a relationship and this one will stifle any future growth.

JackPedigo Level 9 Aug 22, 2022

You're very young, keep looking around for someone who shares your worldview or lack thereof. Now is the time to be checking out lots of potential partners to find just the right fit. Being alone is good, it gives you space to figure out who you are. If you're afraid he will break up with you it shows you can feel the unbalance in the relationship. A good relationship will give you confidence. And yes, Xian love is conditional, essentially do it my way. You deserve better.


If you’re important to him he will make room for you to be comfortable in his life. If he’s important to you, you will make room for his religion in your life. Compromise is possible. If both of you can’t compromise on something as silly as religion, it’s not going to work out anyway.

Garban Level 8 Aug 22, 2022

the only way to have a relationship that lasts is to be honest from the start. Otherwise you are only prolonging and making worse an eventual split that will be even more heartbreaking.

joeandbarb Level 7 Aug 22, 2022

If you feel hurt and betrayed by Christians then why are you dating a Christian? You can't be that desperate.

BitFlipper Level 8 Aug 22, 2022

Anglicans are usually very understanding and accepting people. I have many Anglican friends that know that I'm an atheist and still treat me as a special friend.

I hope you tell him soon and find he is as generous and caring as my Anglican friends.

Lorajay Level 9 Aug 21, 2022
  1. Anglicans are Nothing like Evangelicals.
  2. A talk is long overdue!
  3. IMO next time be honest from the get-go, save both of you a lot of misery....
AnneWimsey Level 9 Aug 21, 2022

When the subject of religion comes up be honest, if it is a deal breaker, it just is. Better to be heartbroken for a while than to live a life of a lie. If he choses to continue make it clear what you are willing to do and NOT do.

glennlab Level 10 Aug 21, 2022

Be true to yourself. If you suppress and withhold who you are, in time resentment will creep into the relationship and threaten to destroy it.

You and you only can chose how you live your life.

Betty Level 8 Aug 21, 2022

How much of your integrity and self-respect are you prepared to sacrifice?

If he is so insecure that he cannot tolerate your agnosticism, he is NOT a worthy catch.

racocn8 Level 9 Aug 21, 2022

Beautifully put! 🙂


What hold has he got over you? Are you prepared to betray yourself to yourself for what that man seems to be offering you? What will you do if you realise that nobody has ever demonstrated the existence of any god, let alone his god?

anglophone Level 8 Aug 21, 2022

You could lead him on a while and break up later, if you prefer.

skado Level 9 Aug 21, 2022

That would be dishonest.

Obviously, some people didn’t get that this was tongue-in-cheek.

@Betty I don't agree with doing it either, but it's become clear to me with online dating that many people do play that game, use people for a while and then reveal who they really are when they are done and ready to leave. Way more selfish than I would ever be..

@MsKathleen There was nothing to indicate that it was.

@Betty Since I frequently use sarcasm as a means of levity, I know it when I see it. You are right; there should have been an “LOL” with it to indicate that it was supposed to be taken lightly.

@MsKathleen It would have been helpful. I tend to take the written word at face value. 🙂

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