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What complaint about you do you keep hearing? I'm impulsive, random, unpredictable, etc. My first two SOs were type A super geniuses (Ivy league families) and my "lack of focus" was a constant source of frustration for them. My wife has a Zen, bend don't break, personality and for the most part is amused and entertained; she does complain about the state of my work space and " why do you get to be the fun parent and she has to enforce the rules?" but overall we are a good fit.

By Buttercup7
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I've often heard that I'm not tan enough or that my hair should be blonder. I've also heard that I care too much but I joke about that being the social worker inside of me lol.

haleyeo95 Level 1 Oct 27, 2018

Buttercup, you sound like a text book ENFP, like me! My best match loved those fun traits in me, where his steadfastness and discernment helped to balance things out.

The wrong matches for me were either threatened or frustrated by my innate personality (easy going, non-structured, spontaneous, fun loving, mischievous, etc...).

Some of the most frequent complaints I hear are to slow/settle down, "be more serious", be less friendly, or be more needy. None are likely to happen, but often point to an incompatibility between us, and so are useful to pick up on.

Zster Level 8 July 2, 2018

I apparently have an overactive libido, supposedly? I'm overly affectionate and demonstrative. And my sense of humor, not everyone gets.

Paul4747 Level 8 June 21, 2018

I live alone. So does my wife we bump into each other in the kitchen from time to time. But, there's no one else in the world that I'd want to live alone with.

Dingodog Level 7 June 18, 2018

That I go off on conversational tangents, and that I presume to know what a partner may be thinking.

UUNJ Level 8 June 17, 2018

me too if I had anyone to complain about that lol


My organization skills were lacking, and when I did organize it wasn't the right way. My housekeeping standards are relaxed and since I live alone it works for me and the kitty girls.

HippieChick58 Level 9 June 17, 2018

I tend to move around a lot and talk loudly when I get excited. When I happy, people think I am spastic. When I am mad, people think I am scary. And so on...

CraeftSmith Level 7 June 17, 2018

I'm a quite animated speaker as well but it serves me well for the most part, I can overwhelm people but I'm also pretty good at reading body language so I usually catch myself.

@Buttercup some day I hope to develop that skill haha


Could it be possible that you have ADD, or ADHD? I got a late diagnosis as an adult. Whee! That's just one part of my alphabet soup.

I'm "anal" or "controlling" because I have read about best scientific cleaning methods and implement them as well as I can. I don't see it as my duty because I have XX chromosomes to do all (or most) of the cleaning. Thus, one of my goals is to get my own place that I don't have to share with a housemate, hopefully my own home, but I'd settle for a subsidized apartment.

If/when I ever live with another humanoid, they either have to split the cleaning with me, or pay someone else to do their share. When I retch almost every time I pass someone's bedroom, it is time for them to clean it. Cleaning involves more than just sweeping up some of the crap off the floor. Asking someone to clean is not being "controlling". Mold is not our friend unless it's penicillium.

Don't get me wrong, I don't expect complete perfection, as I live with and love two cats. One has infiltrative bowel disease. I can't always keep up. Some days it's a boakfest around here.

"Too honest" A friend says that I shouldn't disclose certain things about myself, like my age. I detest the games that people play who only acknowledge a perceived gender binary. Why should I be ashamed or "coquettish" about having taken 58 free trips around the sun? I wish all these people who expect humans not to be human would get off my planet!

I'm not Venus of a Thousand Breasts. First off, it's hard to find a bra that fits. Secondly, I enjoy helping people, but I don't enjoy being sucked dry.

There's more, but I don't have all day.

ailurophile Level 7 June 17, 2018

I have little doubt I would have been so diagnosed in later generations but being artistic and colorful is much more fun than being medicalized. This goes back to school days, I was a discipline problem and "not working up to my potential".

@Buttercup Some people are artistic, colorful, and the medicine helps them get through the day.

@ailurophile And some autistic folks don’t need medicine.

@UUNJ Thanks for that contribution UUNJ, you're absolutely correct!

@Buttercup Wow what a stereotyper you are! Surely someone's told you about that! Your stereotypes are wildly incorrect ......... and insulting!

@UUNJ Autistic or artistic? smile002.gif


NONE, but I live alone. smile001.gif

LetzGetReal Level 8 June 17, 2018

There are real upsides to living alone!

There are, and traveling alone too. It is EASIER TO PLAN~.

Whether one lives alone or with someone though, is a different set of joys and also issues.


I’m stubborn, resistant to anything I feel is coercive, and do not forgive easily(if ever!). From toxic gaslighting ex, of course I was ‘too sensitive’ and ‘crazy’. (Because it’s never THEM, right?!)

CarolinaGirl60 Level 8 June 17, 2018

How DARE you have healthy boundaries?

@ailurophile Right?! ?


The complaints I constantly here boil down to "You're not good enough".

Infoguy211 Level 8 June 17, 2018

WOW, that is rough, I wouldn't hang around for an NYC millisecond if I heard that one!

That’s says something about the people who say that.

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