Never go looking for love, it will happen when you least expect it. But know that you must be open and accepting to the possibilities and the people you meet daily.

I see where you are coming from. The pickiness works both ways, I've had zero interest since I 'came on the market'.

I don't think you become more picky...I just think your tolerance for BS greatly decreases.

If you're expecting to be swept off your feet with adolescent wonder, and capture the excitement of the first time. It isn't going to happen. But if you approach the prospect of relationship with a more mature expectation, then fireworks are very much still on the agenda. Enjoying another's company is the key factor, you can never feel you're too old for that!

I am not hopeful about being in a relationship when I live in a conservative, uneducated, Trump loving corridor of churches. There is a church near every school, more than one on nearly every street and the few single men I have met want to change me into their idea of a traditional lady but pay my own way.

I am paying my own way and having shit my own way as well.

I do not know any other non believers near my age of any gender. Added to the above problems is that I am related to people of color and will not tolerate that racist bullshit my area is so fond of.

I get up at 3am for work so go to bed too early to socialize. Sometimes I think I may be lonely for adult companionship as I spend my off hours with my grandkids since they live here but even they are outgrowing me.

It is true that I am more intolerant of things I accepted when I was young but I spent a lot of years just being alive rather than living. At least I respect myself now.

I would agree l am pickier or maybe l don't overlook as much.

First of all, I think this is a great contribution. Thank you, @EggMcMuffin. And to all those who shared their stories and feedback.

Okay, on to my dos centimos.

I'm 44 and have never been married. Although I would love to find someone who would love me as much as I love him/her (or whose attraction for me is somewhere in the general range of my attraction for them), I've also come to terms with the likelihood that that boat has sailed. Besides, I'm probably better off single. It may seem as if I'm just telling myself that, but considering how stressful relationships can be (and I'm not exactly a simple person), I'm pretty sure that's true.

That guesstimate, by the way, is kinda like my certainty about the existence of God. A strong hunch based on empirical evidence (or the lack thereof).

I guess it depends on--should you find somewhere you're interested in and who's interested in you--how willing you are to be the person your beloved wants you to be. We all have our checkboxes, our non-negotiables for a partner (as they do for us), and some of us have much longer lists than others.

In any case, believing that I'm better off where I'm at has so far been a good survival tactic. Should someone come along and prove me wrong by making me fall in love with them, however, it would be a pleasant surprise. (In the meantime, I'll happily accept any FWBs and/or cuddle buddies who meet my exacting standards.)

Whatever happens, I wish you--all of you--the happiness you deserve.

I've gotten a bit cynical about the whole 'falling in love again' thing myself. Was (mostly) happily married for a lot of years, and still love her (mutually we have no desire to be married any longer), but am not in love with her (and vice versa). She's now just a good friend who I happened to have been naked with regularly for 20+ years.

I remain very interested in intimacy, finding one or more kindred spirits that I can spend time with, and shared interests and activities - but I'm not seeing that I have much probability of falling in love again in that same way again. But good luck to you if that is what you seek.

Perhaps being more picky makes you not waste time with unsuitable people and makes it more likely that you will find someone.

I’m quite certain that I will find much happiness in my future . Life in general always gets more complicated though .Being selective should be a requirement for your soul and ensure personal happiness.................................BUT Being too set in your ways will guarantee loneliness !

Love isn't hard. Negotiating an adult relationship is the mind killer.

I don’t think that’s true , the older you get , the more you want someone by your side to share things with

I think you sound depressed and your chances of falling in love again are far greater than 5%. That does depend on being open to relationships and don't look for love, look for friendships. If a friendship is strong enough it might turn into love but friendships are good too. Stay positive.

Looking back, I think I rushed things, and was willing to accept things just to have love. With time and experience, I have learned the difference between compromise and losing myself for the sake of acceptance. Although I am open to love, I am also happy with where I am in life. I think that, if I am in a relationship again, it will be on a completely different level.

As a liberal agnostic in The South I've had a hard time meeting people of "like minds". I'm also less likely to put up with a whole lot of crap anymore.

I fall in love almost every week. It's just that at my age I cannot afford to take a gamble and I think a lot of women feel the same way. Also at my age this "love" business can mostly be in your head. A man needs to think with the right head.

Soo true I've given up been hurt so many times love will turn up when least expect it xx

Love can be found in many places, i.e. pets, family. True happiness comes from within. Besides it's just a chemical in your brain.

Fall in love and out of love ; what is that ? Don’t get caught up .

Never say never.

I'm 73 years old and give myself a 99% chance of falling in love again, though I've been divorced 15 years and just started seriously dating the last three. My biggest challenge is finding a woman who wants a committed relationship. [I have not read the 86 comments that proceed mine but hope to later.]

I think it's an entirely different ballgame at this age. I have great capacity for both loving & being loved, but falling down the rabbit hole over someone just isn't an option, nor even the ideal anymore. I can share my time, space, passions, brain & body when I please, then circle the wagons for a bit when I'm not feeling it. Nothing wrong or even lesser about that, just different & more reflective of where my heart & head are at this phase of life.

I think you're selling yourself short. You can meet someone and fall in love at any age.

I am right there with you. Almost 47, single with no appreciable relationships for the last 6 years. It's fine to think positively but at some point the reality of the situation has to be embraced. Hang in there and try to be happy anyway.

Well, as a woman, I feel as if I'm in the same boat. For one thing, I don't make myself available to anyone. My work takes a lot of my energy and time. My cats take the rest. I'm an introvert and I value my time alone. Falling in love, truly in love, is something I don't think I have ever experienced in my life, and I wonder if I ever will.