I am 48. I give myself a 5% chance to fall in love again and that's probably a very optimistic number. I think the older you are the more picky you get so the chance of falling on love diminish every day. What do you guys think?
I'm not a guy, but I'm going to respond. I give myself a . 0005% chance of falling in love again and that's probably a very optimistic number. I think the older you get the more you are aware of the lies we've been sold and told in our youth. For instance...#1 I am very capable of taking care of myself and my needs. To be a man in my life, you need to understand...1. I am not your property, 2. I'm not here to serve your every need, including your every fantasy, 3. i'm not here to fulfill some role that you were raised with believing that women fill, 4. I can probably do as much if not more around the house than you, and if I can't, I can find someone (and pay them) who can, 5. If you don't respect me, I'm gone. I've pretty much accepted that I'll be alone for the rest of my life, but you know, that's okay. I'm a pretty decent person to be around...life is good.
I think you sound depressed and your chances of falling in love again are far greater than 5%. That does depend on being open to relationships and don't look for love, look for friendships. If a friendship is strong enough it might turn into love but friendships are good too. Stay positive.
I'm days away from 48 and although I've never put a number to it, I can see how 5% might seem about right. However, I'm not sure it's the "falling in love" part that would be the problem, more the "putting up with someone else's quirks and them putting up with mine" that would be the issue.
I find happiness, joy, friendship, companionship all the time, but not in a "significant other" sort of way.
I'm okay with it; I'm pretty set in my ways, but I wouldn't say no to the concept.
I think it's an entirely different ballgame at this age. I have great capacity for both loving & being loved, but falling down the rabbit hole over someone just isn't an option, nor even the ideal anymore. I can share my time, space, passions, brain & body when I please, then circle the wagons for a bit when I'm not feeling it. Nothing wrong or even lesser about that, just different & more reflective of where my heart & head are at this phase of life.
If you're expecting to be swept off your feet with adolescent wonder, and capture the excitement of the first time. It isn't going to happen. But if you approach the prospect of relationship with a more mature expectation, then fireworks are very much still on the agenda. Enjoying another's company is the key factor, you can never feel you're too old for that!
Well, as a woman, I feel as if I'm in the same boat. For one thing, I don't make myself available to anyone. My work takes a lot of my energy and time. My cats take the rest. I'm an introvert and I value my time alone. Falling in love, truly in love, is something I don't think I have ever experienced in my life, and I wonder if I ever will.
I am 48 and I am more emotionally healthy than I have ever been. I love my life and myself. I enjoy my alone time and after living alone for 12 years I don't worry about falling in love, I worry that I won't be able to tolerate living with anyone again. I am an only child and an introvert. I need LOTS of time alone to be happy.
Don't be so sure. I was 53 when I met the love of my life. Yes I was picky too (and because of her even more so now). She was 47 and we had 16 wonderful years before she died. Of course luck plays a big part but you need to remember actions increases the likelihood. Don't sit still!
I thought I was done with all that too. At 57 I went on a hook-up site. Through with love but not yet dead and I had needs.
Then I met her, it was electric! Never before had I felt that instant lighting bolt of connectivity. She felt it too and although it was stormy and tempestuous. It has to rank as the greatest love affair of my life. Yes she left me for her ex. Yes he had more money. Yes I was an asshole but so was she. Yes it hurts like a bitch every day and yes I would do it again in a New-York minute.
You are a long time dead sunshine. Never say never.