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Fellow agnostics, how do you feel about believers joining?

This is likely contentious, but it needs to be asked. As this is a site "...promoting universal truths and peaceful life without religion" how do you feel about people of faith joining here?

I'm no shrinking violet and I don't need the sort of safe space that so many people believe they do now, but I also don't want to have to engage with people who have been inculcated into some form of unscientific, simple-minded view of the natural world.

I joined in the belief (cough) that this was an exclusive club where I could escape from these folk - but now I find they are joining - with a view to what, I don't know although my hackles are raised.

Not only is this sort of thing wasteful of resources, but if they are here to try to convert or preach at us, that's likely to result in a dissemination to all-out flame wars in a post or two.

I didn't think this was a site to convert people from one way of thinking to another (that sort of thing is nigh-on impossible by the time we're in our 20s anyway.)

I ask because I'm interested what my fellow angostic/athiests think.

I've noted that "theists" tend to butt in to these conversations with their ignorance and that's what I came here to avoid.

I'm getting too old to argue.

Draco 6 Sep 25
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583 comments (26 - 50)

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4

I think it holds the opportunity to opening up great conversations in an encouraging environment surely enough... however you have to watch for the trolls and the overly religious fanatics who cannot comprehend normal human conversation on differing beliefs... but it is ideal to allow those who are different from us agnostics and atheists to have a say... as long as it isn't too intrusive.

4

As long as they're respectful of the beliefs of others, we should allow them their say. I think being agnostic (for me, anyway) it is being open minded enough to allow for people of other beliefs to join and have mature and respectful conversations.
The problem I run into is that they are seldom mature and respectful. You can't argue faith.

5

I agree to an extent with Draco's post above. But I do not resent believers joining, for two reasons:

  1. I need to explore both sides of this issue and if I am not willing to listen to the side of believers I will likely miss a clue, a piece of the puzzle, or at least some resolution that they might offer. I am not gullible, however, and I do not just take anyone's word for anything. That's one reason I am agnostic. I will not be swayed by the type of religious fantasy that is rampant, the extreme and traumatic statements that I am just wrong, or it is all so simple, or that I am evil. I would like to get some clues or even borderline evidence - either way. And in order to do that, I feel I must listen to the logic both sides definitely have. I'm stuck in the middle. I want to be un-stuck. I am not going to fall for elementary and fanatical arguments either for or against this issue. I am looking for resolution.
4

I wouldn't shut up anyone

16

As much as I believe that everybody's view should be respected, I have found over the years that it is useless to try and reason with a believer, because they do not use reason, their mind is full of dogma which no amount of reason can dislodge.

Except not every one of them is like that.

That ain’t necessarily so, I used to be a believer.

24

I came here to circle up with NONbelievers, specifically. ALL other aspects of my life are overrun with the religious. I just want a place to be myself and not have to worry about them. If this site chooses to go fully open, an understandable preference despite my not sharing it, I would likely drop out. Mixed, heavily religious sites pretty much own the internet, as well as US society in general. To become yet another typical site would be unfortunate. I certainly would not likely make time for that.

An exclusive site, largely social (not the same old religion bashing) for nonbelievers? I am behind THAT 120%! I really hope this site goes that way. It's off to a wonderful start!

Zster Level 8 Oct 8, 2017

Clarification: nonbeliever might have been a poor word choice. Perhaps I should have stated religious or those of a belief that would draw them here to bash or convert those of dissimilar mind.

Don't let the religious win. I agree with your comment about "not the same old religion bashing. Refuting religion will require ALL our critical AND compassionate faculties

28

I don't think they should be allowed to join. I joined because this was advertised as a dating site for non-believers. They've got Christian Mingle, let us have this. But of course, I am sure some nut jobs will come in trying to convert people and preach their nonsense. I get enough of their nonsense on Facebook, due to politics always being posted and me being the opinionated person I am, feeling the need to comment, especially when religion is mixed up in politics. And then I get attacked. This is my space to voice my opinion about not being religious and not being attacked for not believing in an imaginary sky daddy.

4

Not everything is for everybody. Come back when you cast off those beliefs.

5

There those who are borderline agnostic. Most of us do not aggressively recruit but we can be open to sharing our thoughts with those riding the fence. We might help them drop superstition from their lives.

2

If they don't mind being laughed at, this is our forum and they know it.

7

They should be allowed to join, just not not to rant or preach. Those should be reported and banned. But it IS a site for agnostics. So take that as you will

4

If a deeply religious person wished to join, then there would likely be no way to actually prevent them, but I think it unlikely that they would expose themselves to potential persuasion or to the threat of their faith being undermined.

4

The question is why would they want to?

4

I know religious people and they are very deceptive about there feelings if they can find something to use against us. Also I know that many people want out of the religious community but are afraid of what could happen to their jobs,friends, social status.

2

the problem I am not sure if religious ppl joined but it;s also an invitation to troll's and not the good kind either out fairy tale books they have gotten good athiest site closed closed wel pages but using mutliple accounts If it wasnt for the troo;s i i would personalywelcome the open disccussion

12

I think, personally, that people who spout religion should be tactfully blocked from the site. I have enough religion jumping up in my face on social media, on the street, in the newspaper etc. I came here today to NOT have religious people on here.

Teresa Level 6 Oct 16, 2017
4

Why would a believer join an atheist site other than s(he) has doubts about their brainwashing from birth until now and their subsequent delusions.

Many religions instruct - even demand - that they witness to and attempt to convert to their religion. A website of "lost souls" to save could be quite enticing to some.

7

Open-minded people listen to their critics. Inteligent disagreement should be welcomed, but how are trolls to be excluded?

7

I'm brand new and the reason I joined is to avoid having to talk to theists! So I say, no, they should not be allowed to join.

2

and what of the aetheists who shove their beliefs down the throats of those who don't see the world exactly as they do?

SamL Level 7 Oct 17, 2017

I agree with you wholeheartedly. Yet, I've seen some responses belittling others and literally stating this is how it is which in my opinion doesn't leave any room at all for discourse. Responses evoking discourse are phrased in a way that promotes discussion not shuts it down.

One of the issues many atheists have with the religious is that many religious positions begin at a point that few atheists can respect. Opinions that are homophobic, misogynistic, racist, etc and respecting that is wrong. People can hold any opinion they want but not all opinions are worthy of respect.

Does that apply to the people as well? Are they worthy of disrespect because you don't respect their opinion?

4

I have no problem with this, hopefully it may help them see how wrong their views are

6

OK with me if they can fade the heat. Most believers don't realize that many atheists were raised in the church and have heard all their arguments and apologia and find them full of holes.

4

So long as they don't come here to troll or preach their religion to us, then I've no problem with it.

Brock Level 3 Oct 18, 2017
24

This is my third time coming back to this question because it caused a lot more debate in my head than I thought it would. I'm an inclusive type of person so my first impulse was to allow them. However, the points I kept coming back to are:

  1. This site provided me with room to breathe in a way I've never experienced before. Sure, everyone has different shades of non-belief and it's stimulating to discuss them, but I'm safe from the theist challenges I deal with in the rest of my life. There are tons of other sites out there where I debate as the black sheep "outsider" with the religious. It doesn't have to be this one.

  2. Although it's a real bonus to find community here, I believed this was promoted as a dating site solely for agnostics which was a big draw for me. In fact, I've never joined a site so quickly as I did this one and I love the people I've met! I don't need to fear getting involved with someone who's just tolerating my beliefs.

So, no, I don't think they should be allowed.

Lauren Level 8 Oct 19, 2017

Take this as a "like" to your comment, silvereyes. (^.^)

I see your point, but in many ways when places become "echo chambers" they can defeat the purpose, especially if that is one of free thinking.

I understand what you're saying, PNEawf, but I've seen a lot of variations of freethinking here so I'm not sure we'd be too monotone. But one thing that seems to be uniform across the board is an unwillingness to date a religious person, so maybe it should be polled? (Or maybe it was, I'll have to go look.)

@Lauren Has it been? I know the question atleast has been asked. I seem to be among the minority lol if thats the case.

@Neraven I believe the site is still open to religious, but it may be open for discussion. But I'll let you know if I find out otherwise.

I agree that there are some here, @Lonely, but I still stand by my position. This is a dating site, and a lot of people are looking for a haven where they don't have to defend their beliefs the way they do on countless believer dating sites - this is, after all, our only dating site. I think many nonbelievers here gain the strength they need to take up the challenge in their real lives, but their activism should not be mandatory to their efforts to meet a mate.

4

As long as "believers" don't push their beliefs, they don't really bother me. If they come to this site, they shoudl keep their opinions to themselves. After all we (nonbelievers) don't go into their place of worship to speak our views.

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