It seems that when I go on dating sites, all I get are religious nuts on one end of the spectrum and guys who want nothing more than a one night stand on the other. Sometimes they are both...LOL. I'm over 50 and dating has been a big zero so far.

Tough post to respond to objectively... experiences vary soooo much, as do our ages.
I started dating again after divorce at age 49... (1970) was ok for few years, unfortunately... seemed “most” women wanted “security” (marriage) in short term. (shit, 47 years ago)
Honestly, to me (and I’m pleased) women have advanced “50/60 years in the last 10 years”... seriously, it’s great... unfortunately, men have advanced “ “6 to 12” months in the same time frame... without the structure of marriage or a “solid long term relationship”, men flounder.
Sorry men, it’s true (majority). Think about it... immaturity... PlayStation, gaming... add insecurity... damn, we’re no longer the prize... but we still think we are.
Now, some women may not have advanced at the same rate... still look for and find men that think they are the “big prize”.
You’re absolutely correct the “pool” is limited for “compatible mates”... not saying we should settle for less, but... we’ve been alarmed by extremism’s, maybe setting up barriers... ?
“... then of the 10 people in your region that are left... “ small pool, barriers.
For the first time in my life I live in a small suburban town of a small city (Tucson)... limits.
I don’t know how to finish... cept, not looking for nurse w a purse... and I don’t think “most men” on this site (and others) aren’t either...
I think today most women can be and should be very direct when meeting (interviewing) men on a first or second date about intentions, wants, needs, wishes...
My problem is I judge people by my own standards...

Wow! Its hard for me to comprehend this. You are some beautiful ladies.

just get a vibrator and a dog but yes you are quite correct

Totally nailed it! I have quit looking. Of course I live in Los Angeles where everyone's outsides match their insides Fake! I work in Radio and I get to go to all the music events I can handle plus I never have to consult with anyone about where and what I'm doing. Totally selfish! Plus I get to sleep around!!

The thing that has always worked when it comes to dating and meeting new people is not to try. Every significant relationship including my marriage I met them when I wasn't actively looking. When I try, I look like a fool as I am no Don Juan.

I recently thought I had a possible match (Yes, it was from Match) and after texting and talking and Skyping, we were set to have coffee, when she sent me a message that she couldn’t see me because I’m an atheist. “Atheist” was on my profile. Hers said she had no religious preference. It was very weird.

She claimed to have been an atheist and her family were atheists and that the lifestyle was not for her. “Lifestyle”? She said that all atheists worshipped something, maybe a dog or their Mom or the TV. It was bizarre. I really came to the conclusion she must be in some odd cult.

After hearing enough of this - and, strangely, she wouldn’t tell me her religion- I told her it was fine, that I don’t date bigots. She did not take that well or seem to understand how it could be bigotry.

I don't know about dating over 50. I was going to ask some others and see what they say. I have not been out on a date in many years. The thought fills me with anxiety. I have no willingess to turn into a gumpy old maid, but does anyone have any stories about dating they would share? Thanks.

I definitely feel your pain I think it's even worse for a black guy trying to date black women that are nonbelievers they're like unicorns. I've been single for about 2 years and I've only met three black women that are atheist or agnostic and two of them were let's just say in an alternate universe I do date other races that's not an issue just haven't found many compatible non-believers

lol I hear ya. Most are so set in their ways, there isn't even a glimmer of hope for them to maybe consider anything outside their comfort zone. Granted, we all our ways of doing things but who doesn't like a bit of adventure~~ It's like you hit a certain age and society thinks you need to change kind of clothes you like, the music you are into, dam near everything.

Re reading the comments because I was bored, I realized that since the 70's I had only "hunted" in only one venue... Dance Floor Clubs, Bars with too loud music to talk. I refused seeking in work venues. Too close for comfort. Or being fixed. I liked the hunt. All this is New to me. I am going dancing tonight. Because that is what I do... what I know. Still works for me. I am were there is a 50 and over crowd of dancers large enough and that haven't see me for over 8 years at least so to the new in the city I am fresh meat until they try to introduce me to their friends and then come the I know you... To everyone, don't give up. Re-invent yourself or change your venue or expand your area of search but don't give up. And do not lower your standards. Your standards should move and slide lateral with your age.

Hahah, and here was I thinking it is a nightmare because everyone else is as old as you are! I sometimes get a fright when I see friends from way back how they have aged, and then I remember, yes, me too. Of course. ( don't feel like it on the inside, but look like it and feel it when I try to jump over a fence or something like it) PS: Vaseline is the best anti wrinkle cream. You cover your bathroom mirror with it!

Oh, if you live in a smallish community, another problem is, of the 10 left, 5 are ex lovers of yours. Why answering to anonymous date thingies in the paper or so would really be taking a gamble ... "Oh no, not YOU!"

Hmm... ok, let’s say you are one of those ten in my region. Would I like you?

As much as I think it would be fun to "mingle" the thought does terrify me. Maybe I can be someone's "gay" friend.

I'm over 50 and have been single for over a year now. What I don't understand, is why I even care about dating at this time in my life. I've done all the good wifie stuff, raised my children, and buried my parents etc. So now I really, really like being on my own, yet I still have emotional and physical feelings for men. You'd think I'd had enough by now

Damn, I hate hearing that...
My wife and I just seperated on very peaceful terms and I havent even asked anyone out on a date yet.

Oh man I absolutely love that I will be 50 and single in 3 days. I was married for 26 years. Dating is awesome. It's all about your headspace and what you want or expect to.get out of it. Im not looking to replace my X. I'm taking my time and dating. Truly dating. I never did it before. I went from one relationship to the other. I eventually want to find a great person for me. Someone who has things in common with me. I've dated from 25 yrs old and up I don't care, different nationalities too. It's been great. You only live once might as well have fun. Short, tall, thin, heavy. Once you get rid if the box you put people in your world opens up. The only thing I require is they have to be smart, nice, cute to me, and not much older than I. I've even had a few good relationship come out of dating but no one perfect for me yet. I got lots of time. Oh and good music taste helps too. No country unless old country.

I'm not Gay, but where does one sign up to be your friend?

It may be the region of the country in which I live, or it may be simply my gender. I have found the dating and my age is delightful.

To begin, women over 50 are far more interesting than their younger counterparts. They have experiences so, they have developed views over years and they have had the opportunity to travel, often raise families, and become more worldly.

Many of them have shed the inhibitions of Youth. Well they may have developed routines in their daily life often they are relatively open-minded and able to engage on a variety of topics in the variety of ways.

That is not to say that there are not bumps along the way and quite frankly, those who prove that there are significantly more horses asses than horses in the world.

Open your mind and your heart. You will find like-minded people when you least expect it.

Dating had always been a nightmare at any age..it's just turning 50s that you realize all the pointless BS you dealt with when younger no longer applies..

Not just women....scary sites....what are you meant to do....don't know anymore....

I think you just about summed it up lol I would also add, and I'm not being sexist as I've only seen female profiles, there is usually of huge list of what they don't like, thus the bar is set so high it's no wonder they don't have anyone. The other one that amuses/irritates me is that prospective dates must be of a minimum height, I.e must be at least 5'10", not because they themselves are tall but because they obviously think this clearly filters out the twats.

I just got back into dating after many years, I am living the very nightmare you describe.

It is a nightmare

I don't know if I'm prepared to put the time in that I think dating would require. Being single again takes more time and effort. Previously there were two of us to do all the general everyday stuff such as cooking, cleaning, etc. And 2 incomes. Now I'm finding I have to work more hours to earn enough and spend more time dong household stuff. That doesn't leave me much time for 'chasing the ladies' plus those tunes are not going to play themselves
So, sure, there are things I miss about not having a partner and should Uma Thurman show up at my door clutching a banjo I wouldn't turn her away its just not as important to me as it once was.