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How do you deal with Door-knockers?

Whether they be Witnesses, Mormons, or another proselytizing religion, how do you deal with people coming to your door to spread their religion?
I just had my first experience since getting a place of my own and had a decent conversation through the crack in my door. After I told him I was an atheist he tried to use apologetics; when I told him I was familiar with his arguments and didn't find them convincing further explaining that I take a scientific route of belief and chose not to believe until there is evidence for a god. He understood and thanked me for explaining and listening to him and he left with a handshake. I was surprised at myself for how civil I was to him but how does everyone else usually respond?

Nicsnort 6 Oct 14
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783 comments (76 - 100)

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5

I ask these “fundamentalist door knockers” into my house-lock the door & offer them some tea or coffee then go through their tiny minds like a chainsaw. I torture them with facts and knowledge about the cruel Bible & why their imaginary God is a psychopath. And in our discussions which become an interrogation it becomes very clear why belief in a religion and an imaginary God is a mental illness.

5

If they have children with them I address the children and ignore the adults. I tell the child the adults are evil and they should get away. Usually I am not bothered again, everyone is happier really.

DrT Level 4 Dec 18, 2018

I did the same thing to a couple of Street preachers who brought three children with them—I told them that their fathers were crazy, and I hope that they didn’t grow up to be as crazy and ignorant as their parents. Why was I So cruel? Because in these situations and you only have about 30 seconds to get it across to children that their crazy religious parents are wrong and hope that they grow up Questioning how others see their parents screaming through microphone on the street corner.

@Weismonger but that isn't cruel at all.

5

I asked one of them one time if it really says in their bible that only 144,000 are going to heaven. He said yes. I said then what the hell do ya need me for and shut the door.

5

I am actually looking forward to the next door knockers. I haven't had any in years. I have lots of things to discuss with them. While it is not easy to deconvert people, i look forward to the opportunity, LOL.

Your response made me remember a summer when my girls were in high school. A couple of young mormon men regularly rode their bikes through the neighborhood and introduced themselves to my girls. I was going to tell them both to piss off, but I listened in on their conversation. My girls were slaying these guys. It was great. They were throwing all the stuff they'd learned about the bible and philosophy and history and these guys didn't know their ass from a hole in the ground. I was so proud!
These guys came by several times that summer. They were all close in age, I knew they were all attracted to each other, in addition to the fact both sides took up the challenge to convince the other. I never got into the conversations but hovered close by and so enjoyed all the byplay. The mormons finally did give up. But my girls had a lot of fun with the "the front porch debates".

The Seventh-day Adventist’s, the Mormons, & the church of God nuts are the best fun. Their specific religious beliefs are so wacky it just becomes a comedy act.

5

Ask yourself, 1) could I have fun with this. 2) can I learn something here? 3) can this sharpen my atheist epistemology tool box.

5

Since I used to be the one doing the knocking, I have some compassion for these folks. It was never a natural thing for me to do and I hated it. I was dragged into it by my parents. Depending on my mood, I either don’t answer the door or I explain that I’m a former and no longer interested.

I appreciate your mention of compassion. It can get pretty hot where I live, and I’ll sometimes offer folks some water. Just because the ideas don’t at all resonate with me, no reason to be nasty or inconsiderate.

And what kind of torture is it for these poor Mormon kids to have to spend two years wearing a white shirt, black pants and a bicycle helmet pedaling around neighborhoods looking like escapees From a mental institution?!

5

I did a bad thing! Lol! When I was 22 I believe we got a lot of knockers almost daily it seemed. We put a pentagram on the door and never had a knocker again. Lol!

5

I love it when religious door knockers come knocking at my door. I have heard of many people slamming the doors on their faces, but not me. I invite them in and ask them questions. I used to be a Christian for many years and thought I knew what I believed and why I believed them until I started questioning my own beliefs, and I found out I really had no good reason to believe these things any more. Now, I use the same techniques on them as I used on my self. When questioning them, it is easy to find out from them that they are not fully sold on what they themselves are being sold, which they begin to manifest by their stuttering and stammering. All in all, I handle them by questioning them not to show them up, but to help them as much as I have helped myself. I can still remember that I was once where they are not very long ago. It doesn't offend me that they sometimes express sympathy toward me for my non beliefs, because I was once where they now are. I have had good conversations with believers as well.

5

I invite them in. I never mind discussing. Since I am a school teacher, by nature I am open to others expressing themselves as they make sense of the world around them. We all need to connect with others. Many door-knockers are surprised to be invited in. I've learned that one way to say "No" is to find a way to say "Yes."

5

When I lived in a neighborhood where people would go door-to-door, I posted a NO SOLICITING sign. Of course they would ignore this. My first question to them was to ask if they could read. When they said yes... I told them they must have missed my NO SOLICITING sign. They automatically jump to the "Oh, we aren't asking for money!"

It was then I would reach into the little drawer in a plant stand I had by the front door. I kept slips of paper in there with this printed on it...

so·lic·i·ta·tion

/səˌlisəˈtāSH(ə)n/

noun

noun: solicitation; plural noun: solicitations

the act of asking for or trying to obtain something from someone.

I would hand them the definition, then close the door.

To rid myself of Door to Door Jesus Jockeys selling superstitions, etc, I painted a sign that is fixed in plain sight that simply states, " If you are here to sell me anything, talk about Religion, etc, etc, then it WILL cost $50 per minute or part thereof paid in CASH only and payable in ADVANCE.
it has been up for over 5 years now and I've had peace and quite from the Bible-Bashers ever since.

5

I offer them my full sympathy for their loss of reason, and close the door.

5

In the Netherlands we have stickers (provided by the local gouvernement) that you can put on your mailbox. In my case Yes to charity and No to sellers or religious proselytizing. It really works in the Netherlands and do not get interrupted anymore. It saves you time, frustration and you can evade those silly discussion. So I agree with Chainsmkmtair that a sign may be a very effective way of prevention. Otherwise you can also shock them by answering the door naked if they are too stubborn to respect the sign.

Stickers like that sound like an amazing idea. Though I bet if they were provided by the government in the US people would start complaining that their "free speech" was being impaired.

@Nicsnort
I think I can also complain that they impair my privacy, as they have no valid reason to knock on my door (see the sign).

5

I tell them "I have my beliefs already, but thanks" and move to close the door.
If they get pushy, I get inappropriate.
I was challenged a few weeks by an Ernest young man who put his foot in the storm door..."may I ask what those are?"
That pissed me off.
Looking at his foot I followed it all the way up to his eyes.
"I believe you would look a LOT better naked in my bed"
He turned a few shades of red and pulled his foot back.
"You boys have a nice day"
I shut my door.

5

Depends if I am busy or not. If I am busy I give the a brush off.
If I am not I invite them in, that always gets me placed on their no knock list.

5

In our neighborhood we have a homeowners group rules that helps keep solicitation of thus Hyperion. this helps to keep the door knockers out of the neighborhood. And the event that we get door knockers we just call homeowners groups leaders tell them about the problem and they send security out

5

I have had Witnesses come and "visit". I hear them out and even take their literature. I have found that, if you question them enough about some of the idiotic parts of the Bible they will reach a point where they will not be able to find an answer. Since I am retired I have plenty of time and there is plenty of shit in the Bible to ask questions about.

5

Mooning can be effective.

5

I also have a well read Bible at my front door stand. I ask them to explain Isaiah 45:7.

5

I like engaging them civilly. I tend to go for a Platonic questioning route and let them talk and inevitably they talk themselves into something silly. Usually this repeats over and over, but I'm good with that if I have the time.

I get the feeling they never get to talk without it being a pitch and I've had some lovely conversations on mild sunny days where the elder of the two rushed the younger away when they started nodding at my statements.

5

I tell them there is no Solicitation in my community and they have 5 seconds to leave before I call the police.

It's nice to have a Mossberg 500 at port arms when you explain..... Have never made a citizens Arrest, may happen, getting old and cranky!

5

Tell them politely, Thanks but I’m not interested, and shut the door

5

Turtle myself inside my shell until they go away.

5

With this:

5

Naked. That or offer them a beer or ask if they want to join my orgy. Keep on meaning to wear a robe, have the lights off, and say yay! 2 volunteers for the sacrifice

5

I show them my Satanic Temple membership card. Then I hiss at them.

Where do I get a card? I kind of feel sorry for these folks as for me it seems most of them are just starting out to do this. There is always someone showing someone else what to do. Last time I had the Mormons show up it was just after working on a Temple in Portland. Told theem what I did and had a great conversation. Told them I was not interested and that they should reat their valued workers better. Went over like a brick. These people treated me great, wanted me to join so I could travel the world working for them. No interest as they did not treat their lead man well at all.

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