Jehovah's Witnesses are the most prevalent in my area. I don't deal with them much because if they approach me, I tell them that they aren't allowed to speak to me because I'm a former JW who was "disfellowshipped". (I'm not, but I tell them this.) It's worked wonderfully because other JW's in my area are then warned not to approach me because they believe I've been shunned by one of their congregations.

I learned this trick from my ex-sister-in-law who actually is a disfellowshipped JW.

When I lived in a neighborhood where people would go door-to-door, I posted a NO SOLICITING sign. Of course they would ignore this. My first question to them was to ask if they could read. When they said yes... I told them they must have missed my NO SOLICITING sign. They automatically jump to the "Oh, we aren't asking for money!"

It was then I would reach into the little drawer in a plant stand I had by the front door. I kept slips of paper in there with this printed on it...

so·lic·i·ta·tion

/səˌlisəˈtāSH(ə)n/

noun

noun: solicitation; plural noun: solicitations

the act of asking for or trying to obtain something from someone.

I would hand them the definition, then close the door.

My sister turns the sprinklers on them.

I have 3 things I do:

1. Open door see thumpers, scream "AHHH thumpers go away!" Slam door.
2. If they are white, I call the cops & tell them I am being harassed by a gang of scary looking people.
3. Invite them in & try to convert them to a religion I made up called poontology.

Same thing happened to me. They're most nice people and generally very courteous.

I like to start with the core stories in the Bible. Noah is obviously the best one to bring up because it is obviously rediculous. Most of them that come to your door have little knowledge of what they are even trying to sell and haven’t heard real arguments from the other side. I keep the discussion simple but go for the throat with facts that can’t be disputed. Works every time. They never come back and it is always fun for me. Not for them but for me ?

At the top of my lungs, I scream, "don't touch my cock!" over and over, like calling for help, while maintaining eye contact.
I'm hoping it catches on and more people do the same.

I got a couple of knockers the other day in fact. Although I think they are cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs I treat them just as I would anyone else trying to sell me something I'm not interested in. I politely say no thank you, smile & wish them a nice day.
They are still human beings (albeit brainwashed) but I won't be shitty to anyone simply because I disagree with their lifestyle or choices.

I try to out crazy them. For example if they claim to have heard the word of God I mention that I hear the word of Cuthulu and he says to unleash choas upon the world. They usually leave quickly after that lol

I challenge ...

Me reply to door knockers is always the same....
I am a practicing Theodolite, thank you anyway.

I ask these “fundamentalist door knockers” into my house-lock the door & offer them some tea or coffee then go through their tiny minds like a chainsaw. I torture them with facts and knowledge about the cruel Bible & why their imaginary God is a psychopath. And in our discussions which become an interrogation it becomes very clear why belief in a religion and an imaginary God is a mental illness.

I must ask why is it necessary to come to your door in the first place? Surely if you had a tiny desire to buy an encyclopedia or seek religion, you would go to the place where a variety of the product is displayed? It can only mean that they are there to convince you of something against your will. Or to buy something you don't need, want, or afford?

My roommate tells them "we worship satan in this house" and they immediately run. The one time I talked to them as a teenager I gave him some new perspectives on the doctrine and what knowing God actually means (basically to refute the idea that u have to know jesus to recognize God after death), he got really introspective and thoughtful for a minute, said thank you, and walked away lol.

No trespassing signs and beware of dogs, although mine are actually small, but they don't know that.

I often don't answer. We have "live reptiles" and "snakes present" signs on property as deterrents, which seem to be working. Occasionally, I will talk with them, getting their speech over as quickly as possible, taking the pamphlets.

Don't answer

I certainly aren,t civil to them at all.As an ex JW and an atheist now( also classed as an apostate by JWs)I have a sign on my door and on my letter box that says No Jehovah Witnesses!If by chance they did still grab me as I got in the car, I tell them F... off, I am an apostate.My daughter was molested by one of them in the cult as I call it, and it was kept within the church.She was one of many.To me JWs are just another brainwashing cult,and to cut my story short just use a sign on your post box or door, they won,t be back.As they usually do 6 weekly rounds in the hope that you may be at a low ebb e.g your wife died etc, and they get you when your down .

It's easy "thanks not interested have a nice day" shut the door.

I had a sign on my door that said "No solicitors, especially religious." It worked.

I rarely ever have this happen. If I happen to see them coming, I don’t answer the door. If I’m caught off guard, I usually listen for a little bit but then tell them I’m not interested.

Laugh and close the door.

My Dog keeps them away from the Door, if they show the nuts to come into the yard it takes only one look at my look and they go away!

I've always been cordial. I say no thank you, I'm an athiest and they just go oooh ok bye. Lol

Politely tell them you are not interested.

I have this little notice posted on my front door:

Never Mind The Dog . . . BEWARE OF THE OWNER