zeuser's Profile

Um, I changed my mind about the egg white omelet thanks.

silverotter11 comments on Jun 9, 2022:

😏🤣🤣🤣😈Good ones! Love the egg separator!

zeuser replies on Jun 10, 2022:

@glennlab Glenn, geez. Bury her already. 😉😂

Where is all that salmon going to?

NHjulie comments on Jun 10, 2022:

Love the dog one!

zeuser replies on Jun 10, 2022:

A legitimate doggie concern. LOL

There used to be some great contributors to this group, they posted clever and extremely funny posts...

zeuser comments on Jun 9, 2022:

A couple of suggestions AC. You can block whoever is irritating you. You can unfollow the group. You can take the good and ignore the bad. You can start your own group and make up some rules that suit you. I hope you stick around. If my posts are annoying you, well man that is tough shit. All the ...

zeuser replies on Jun 10, 2022:

@Austin-Cambridge I can relate. 😉

Um, I changed my mind about the egg white omelet thanks.

silverotter11 comments on Jun 9, 2022:

😏🤣🤣🤣😈Good ones! Love the egg separator!

zeuser replies on Jun 9, 2022:

@silverotter11 Shut the front door! LOL

Loafers. Har Har. 😉

LucyLoohoo comments on Jun 9, 2022:

Pretty crumby joke, Z!

zeuser replies on Jun 9, 2022:

Hey now! 😉

Um, I changed my mind about the egg white omelet thanks.

silverotter11 comments on Jun 9, 2022:

😏🤣🤣🤣😈Good ones! Love the egg separator!

zeuser replies on Jun 9, 2022:

I know, who would buy that, right?

Um, I changed my mind about the egg white omelet thanks.

glennlab comments on Jun 8, 2022:

Did you ever wonder if the cavemen were just letting there kids draw on the walls to keep them busy?

zeuser replies on Jun 8, 2022:

Ya know, I read somewhere that those stencil handprints on the cave walls were a size similar to a child's hand. So that's not a bad theory. And who knows? That shit was 15,000 years ago!

Memphis lawmakers call to deny Trump police escort at rally over unpaid bills: ‘He’s notorious ...

zeuser comments on Jun 7, 2022:

What's the point of holding onto all that (mostly ill-gotten) money if you never pay anybody? I never figured that part out.

zeuser replies on Jun 8, 2022:

@LucyLoohoo Ah, ok, I get it now. Thanks, Lu.

I haven't been to chick fil homophobes in decades. I will only go on Sundays, those pricks.

HankSherman comments on Jun 6, 2022:

Am a virgin. Have never been to a chick fe lay.

zeuser replies on Jun 6, 2022:

@HankSherman A caricature which scares the chick fil a corporation.

I haven't been to chick fil homophobes in decades. I will only go on Sundays, those pricks.

HankSherman comments on Jun 6, 2022:

Am a virgin. Have never been to a chick fe lay.

zeuser replies on Jun 6, 2022:

If you go, wear a pink tutu and heavy eye makeup. They love that shit there. 🙄

I haven't been to chick fil homophobes in decades. I will only go on Sundays, those pricks.

St-Sinner comments on Jun 5, 2022:

Conservatives are louder on all social media. Our message is weaker.

zeuser replies on Jun 5, 2022:

That's because our audience thinks about what we say, and it bounces off the other guys.

I haven't been to chick fil homophobes in decades. I will only go on Sundays, those pricks.

Garban comments on Jun 5, 2022:

Insensitive, but hilarious.🤣

zeuser replies on Jun 5, 2022:

That is just what I was going for. LOL

The rest of the Saturday dump. It's not what it looks like, LOL.

glennlab comments on Jun 4, 2022:

cop car hits home.

zeuser replies on Jun 4, 2022:

I know, right? They keep undermining their own positions but they still keep parroting them.

Who you gonna call?

LucyLoohoo comments on Jun 4, 2022:

Notice the pustule's aiming his ''play'' gun?

zeuser replies on Jun 4, 2022:

@OldGoat43 You can't fix breathtaking stupidity like that.

Who you gonna call?

LucyLoohoo comments on Jun 4, 2022:

Notice the pustule's aiming his ''play'' gun?

zeuser replies on Jun 4, 2022:

It's a snub nose.

Navarro Rants About ‘Our Republic’ as Hearing on Contempt Charges Goes Off the Rails ...

zeuser comments on Jun 3, 2022:

Hey Pete! Maybe if you didn't try to overthrow the government and then ignore subpoenas when they caught your ass, maybe then they wouldn't arrest you at all. Food for thought, which I guess we should put at the bottom of a stagnant pond so a bottom feeder like you could find it. You execrable, ...

zeuser replies on Jun 4, 2022:

@Redheadedgammy I believe one theory is that they will overwhelm the DOJs limited resources and wait for a new administration. But like @joeandbarb said, once the first one starts eating prison food, the whole house of cards will start to topple. I hope.

Four can fit in one car, two in the front, two in the back.

Sticks48 comments on Jun 3, 2022:

Sure, like elephants can read. 😂

zeuser replies on Jun 4, 2022:

Good point.

Navarro Rants About ‘Our Republic’ as Hearing on Contempt Charges Goes Off the Rails ...

glennlab comments on Jun 3, 2022:

He probably can't get a council willing to present his arguments seeing the how the courts have responded to the frivolous arguments in previous cases.

zeuser replies on Jun 3, 2022:

He told the court appointed lawyer to go pound sand. He can get competent counsel, but then he wouldn't be able to clownishly grandstand with his five and dime logic and fictional legal theories. I hope they put his wrinkled ass on ice for as long as possible.

Four can fit in one car, two in the front, two in the back.

glennlab comments on Jun 3, 2022:

loved grateful Ted.

zeuser replies on Jun 3, 2022:

If I was all smoked up, it would have fooled me too. LOL

Flat Earthers....

HankSherman comments on Jun 3, 2022:

Let'em live...everybodies got the right to be wrong. Just keep them from promulgating.

zeuser replies on Jun 3, 2022:

And FFS don't elect them.

Never, ever put ketchup on a hot dog in Chicago. They don't put up with that there.

dalefvictor comments on Jun 2, 2022:

I enjoyed these, thanks.

zeuser replies on Jun 2, 2022:

De nada.

Never, ever put ketchup on a hot dog in Chicago. They don't put up with that there.

glennlab comments on Jun 2, 2022:

Keep up the good work.

zeuser replies on Jun 2, 2022:

I’m gonna try, pard. 😉

Might want to rethink that name.

zeuser comments on Jun 2, 2022:

Don't wanna know what kind of cheese you'd pair with that.

zeuser replies on Jun 2, 2022:

@Garban Perfect!

I really thought they'd pick me this time, but no.

Kynlei comments on Jun 1, 2022:

The last one is good, but this exists: https://youtu.be/c_0bhT98g9Y

zeuser replies on Jun 1, 2022:

Yeah, I've seen this before. It's a good marketing approach.

I really thought they'd pick me this time, but no.

glennlab comments on Jun 1, 2022:

quite a good collection.

zeuser replies on Jun 1, 2022:

Thanks, man.

Narcissistic memorial day.

glennlab comments on May 31, 2022:

Time that he joined them.

zeuser replies on May 31, 2022:

@Garban You're right, quite appropos!

Narcissistic memorial day.

glennlab comments on May 31, 2022:

Time that he joined them.

zeuser replies on May 31, 2022:

NOT in a military cemetery. But anywhere else.

There is an element of truth there... or is there? I take it with a pinch of salt. 😆

glennlab comments on May 31, 2022:

Was the chemistry right?

zeuser replies on May 31, 2022:

It's elementary humor, Glenn.

I miss Kenny Rogers.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2022:

Bet next time he makes sure to tighten his nuts....

zeuser replies on May 30, 2022:

Spoke too soon, eh?

I miss Kenny Rogers.

EricJones comments on May 29, 2022:

I wonder which is going to bounce farther-the wheel or the guy on the bike.

zeuser replies on May 30, 2022:

My money is on the wheel.

I'll tell you what you can do with yer colonoscopy....

glennlab comments on May 29, 2022:

I seen the free range cats revel in my catnip patch, I didn't know they had a group.

zeuser replies on May 29, 2022:

It can turn into a problem if you don't nip it in the bud. LOL

I'll tell you what you can do with yer colonoscopy....

Garban comments on May 29, 2022:

After swimming thousands of miles to lay her eggs, mama turtles need to cut loose!🥂🍻🎉

zeuser replies on May 29, 2022:

I don't begrudge them.

A very woody situation here.

dalefvictor comments on May 28, 2022:

The tree was knotty.

zeuser replies on May 28, 2022:

Ok, you win this thread already.

Reading can be relaxing.

St-Sinner comments on May 28, 2022:

I like to read when I have company.

zeuser replies on May 28, 2022:

I can get behind that idea.

Reading can be relaxing.

bobwjr comments on May 28, 2022:

Sweet

zeuser replies on May 28, 2022:

A real page turner is the best. 😜

The kids had a ball.

CurmudgeonBoy comments on May 27, 2022:

Only in Boston

zeuser replies on May 28, 2022:

Yeah, now that you mention it, I can hear the accent in my head on the last gag. LOL

The kids had a ball.

racocn8 comments on May 27, 2022:

Eye don't get it...

zeuser replies on May 27, 2022:

Actually, the eyes have it.

Better than monkey pox, but more embarrassing.

Lorajay comments on May 24, 2022:

Is there something wrong with me? I get about half of the New Yorker cartoons.

zeuser replies on May 27, 2022:

@HankSherman Ah man, I stopped getting paper magazines a good 15 years ago and I recycled my back issues. You ought to be able to find them online if you're really interested. I read the free New Yorker articles I get each month, but I don't subscribe anymore. Sorry.

Better than monkey pox, but more embarrassing.

Lorajay comments on May 24, 2022:

Is there something wrong with me? I get about half of the New Yorker cartoons.

zeuser replies on May 27, 2022:

@HankSherman You should take a look.

Ring a bell for anyone?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2022:

https://youtu.be/UaEC-lWSlmI

zeuser replies on May 25, 2022:

Great song! Introduced a lot of boomers to Mr. B.

Trump and all of his "replacement killers".

LucyLoohoo comments on May 25, 2022:

WOW, Zeuser! You've been busy! (And so's the PUSTULE.)

zeuser replies on May 25, 2022:

I just reposted. The folks who've been busy are the white supremacist terrorists. 😡

Well, that's my job, so....

NHjulie comments on May 25, 2022:

When did trump hire someone named jenkins?

zeuser replies on May 25, 2022:

I doubt he "recalls".

Worth posting one more time.

yvilletom comments on May 24, 2022:

Next time, have a man ask the dumb question.

zeuser replies on May 24, 2022:

Stupidity doesn't rely on gender. It is an equal opportunity disfunction.

Now he's gonna have to lug that thing back tomorrow.

bobwjr comments on May 24, 2022:

Copying the book one

zeuser replies on May 24, 2022:

Feel free. I stole it!

Now he's gonna have to lug that thing back tomorrow.

Lorajay comments on May 24, 2022:

How do you break an anvil?

zeuser replies on May 24, 2022:

I think that's the gag.

Better than monkey pox, but more embarrassing.

Lorajay comments on May 24, 2022:

Is there something wrong with me? I get about half of the New Yorker cartoons.

zeuser replies on May 24, 2022:

I think the gag is that this makes fun of all the dumbasses who don't get them.

Put another quarter in, come on!

HankSherman comments on May 23, 2022:

Politics is all about being two-faced.

zeuser replies on May 23, 2022:

That's a fact!

Some dirty pictures.

Gnarloc comments on May 21, 2022:

Ok, that first one is just frikkin' awesome!

zeuser replies on May 21, 2022:

I know, right?

I won't tell!!!

zeuser comments on May 21, 2022:

Yeah, that's her all right. *sigh*

zeuser replies on May 21, 2022:

@racocn8 I'm talking to lefty. I think I have a shot. 😜

High standards

zeuser comments on May 21, 2022:

Me, dancing, nude or not, is not compatible with dignity. Sorry. ;)

zeuser replies on May 21, 2022:

@JackPedigo Take your pick. Both of them simultaneously is the exact opposite of dignity.

Looks like it takes more than just a criminal's endorsement to get you over the, um, hump.

NHjulie comments on May 20, 2022:

Wish I knew what actually went on. Is he making everything up because of a mental breakdown, because he thought somehow it would get him more power or something else.

zeuser replies on May 20, 2022:

He's just lying because it seemed like a good idea at the time, and consequences for his behavior are only just now starting to sink in.

Today's humorous lesson: Fundamentalisms of logic.

NHjulie comments on May 20, 2022:

It continues to amaze me how some very "smart" people can be so stupid.

zeuser replies on May 20, 2022:

Intelligence and education unfortunately have only a very limited impact on reflexive, ill-advised value judgments, which, once formed, can only rarely be dislodged.

Today's humorous lesson: Fundamentalisms of logic.

Betty comments on May 20, 2022:

Funny and terrifying and yet that concept has been handed down from generation to generation. It has to stop.

zeuser replies on May 20, 2022:

Yeah, you're right. 😞

Today's humorous lesson: Fundamentalisms of logic.

jeshuey comments on May 20, 2022:

The fact that it's true spoils the laugh.

zeuser replies on May 20, 2022:

That would be true if we were laughing with them, but I know that I at least am laughing AT them.

Our boy and his SCOTUS picks, quite the crew.

LucyLoohoo comments on May 20, 2022:

Do those women really have the intelligence to drink? Maybe a man should decide for them?

zeuser replies on May 20, 2022:

@LucyLoohoo It's coming.

Looks like it takes more than just a criminal's endorsement to get you over the, um, hump.

LucyLoohoo comments on May 20, 2022:

Nawww...Mickey's smarter than that!

zeuser replies on May 20, 2022:

I think Mickey might just be breaking balls here, but I can't be sure.

Our boy and his SCOTUS picks, quite the crew.

LucyLoohoo comments on May 20, 2022:

Do those women really have the intelligence to drink? Maybe a man should decide for them?

zeuser replies on May 20, 2022:

If they are republicans, then no, they don't. :(

That's a bad spot to be in.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 19, 2022:

How about we just ban conservatives instead.....

zeuser replies on May 19, 2022:

Maybe require some educational requirements before allowing anyone to hold public office, and maybe tripling the funding devoted to public education and eliminating vouchers for religion-based home schooling? 🤔🙄

That's a bad spot to be in.

Garban comments on May 19, 2022:

Beeking News. The chicken interview. 🤣 Go ahead and groan.

zeuser replies on May 19, 2022:

That one laid an egg, G. 😏

Zoom spelled backwards is "mooz".

Beowulfsfriend comments on May 17, 2022:

The last one is outstanding -

zeuser replies on May 17, 2022:

Yeah, I put it last because I knew it had some punch to it.

Zoom spelled backwards is "mooz".

dalefvictor comments on May 17, 2022:

All who wander are not lost.

zeuser replies on May 17, 2022:

When in doubt, go left.

Zoom spelled backwards is "mooz".

MichelleGar1 comments on May 17, 2022:

Love the last one! 😂😂😂

zeuser replies on May 17, 2022:

Yeah, I liked that one too. ;)

I know how he feels.

JackPedigo comments on May 17, 2022:

Unfortunately, assertiveness does not automatically mean aggressiveness. I admire an assertive woman who says what she wants without aggression or being bossy. It saves a lot of having to read ones mind.

zeuser replies on May 17, 2022:

@JackPedigo You'd be surprised. There are a lot of regressive-minded women around too, but yeah, mostly men make this mitake.

I know how he feels.

JackPedigo comments on May 17, 2022:

Unfortunately, assertiveness does not automatically mean aggressiveness. I admire an assertive woman who says what she wants without aggression or being bossy. It saves a lot of having to read ones mind.

zeuser replies on May 17, 2022:

I think the gag in the cartoon pokes fun at people who assume that it does.

Know your wildlife.

Lorajay comments on May 17, 2022:

It could have been a skunk.

zeuser replies on May 17, 2022:

Not with those "ears".

Reminds me of the name game.

racocn8 comments on May 16, 2022:

What an ennobling bit of pareidolia!!

zeuser replies on May 16, 2022:

It's part of what makes us human.

Reminds me of the name game.

Betty comments on May 16, 2022:

I remember the song and now it's in my head and it won't leave. Your fault! 😂

zeuser replies on May 16, 2022:

Sorry!

Reminds me of the name game.

Garban comments on May 16, 2022:

What a Crappy tweet!

zeuser replies on May 16, 2022:

Q: What do you call the white stuff in bird shit? A: Bird shit.

Reminds me of the name game.

glennlab comments on May 16, 2022:

Hated it. and they kept on playing it on the only top 40 radio station in the area.

zeuser replies on May 16, 2022:

We all sang it though!

They both have a leg to stand on now.

silverotter11 comments on May 15, 2022:

Those are fun and funny🤩🤣😈.

zeuser replies on May 15, 2022:

Some days are better than others. Thanks.

They both have a leg to stand on now.

Garban comments on May 15, 2022:

Your mummy is HOT!😉

zeuser replies on May 15, 2022:

She gave her partner a straight up boner!

Just say we are involved with speed reading.

HankSherman comments on May 14, 2022:

Mine wants to bitch because I won't put it in a feeder like everyone else.

zeuser replies on May 14, 2022:

It's a never ending battle if you do.

Fun fact.

miklthetaz comments on May 12, 2022:

It appears you spelled biden wrong

zeuser replies on May 12, 2022:

Any other clever remark you want to put out here, sparky? Go ahead, cut loose!

Yeah, that's her all right.

racocn8 comments on May 10, 2022:

That's when he unzips and uses his laser pointer.

zeuser replies on May 11, 2022:

I am guessing the Batman's utility belt laser pointer might be a little over-powered for that kind of thing.

Grog got around.

LucyLoohoo comments on May 10, 2022:

Every parent in the history of time has coped with a kid like Jeffrey! :-)

zeuser replies on May 11, 2022:

I sure did!

Trump has lawsuit against Twitter tossed out for failure to meet his burden of evidence.

Redheadedgammy comments on May 9, 2022:

If he has no intention of re joining Twitter even if Musk allows it, why bother with this lawsuit? I guess he thinks there will be a payoff for this stupidity. 🙄

zeuser replies on May 9, 2022:

I don't think he will rejoin twitter even if that nazi Musk lets him back because there is a distinct possibility, which the reptilian part of his brain that drives his decison-making is aware, that he will have far fewer followers than before. Maybe that's true, maybe not, but he can't risk being seen as a loser if there are a lot less people following his calcified lard ass. He won't risk that. Because he is a yellow-bellied lily-livered coward.

Trump has lawsuit against Twitter tossed out for failure to meet his burden of evidence.

zeuser comments on May 9, 2022:

He sues reflexively because he can afford it and it makes him feel like he is satisfying his lust for vindictiveness in the short run. His attention span is so short, he generally forgets the lawsuits he initiates, unless it's to prolong and delay the lawsuit to drain the resources of whomever he ...

zeuser replies on May 9, 2022:

@SeaGreenEyez Those plus bribes and hush money and settlements.

This illegitimate SCOTUS is the direct result of this illegitimate "president".

puff comments on May 7, 2022:

As presidents go, would not describe Trump as a wartime president. Why doesn't Joe proclaim another executive order re abortion, he seems fond of them. Or democrats use their house majority?

zeuser replies on May 7, 2022:

The ruling is not yet official. There is a lot of fundraising that will happen on this issue, so the calculus will be what actions will inspire the biggest influx of donations. This is America, after all. We follow the bucks.

Been there?

zeuser comments on May 7, 2022:

Don't forget where this all starts.

zeuser replies on May 7, 2022:

@Beowulfsfriend Yes, I have been to all of those places.

This illegitimate SCOTUS is the direct result of this illegitimate "president".

racocn8 comments on May 7, 2022:

Abortion is only a gimmick for the GQP. Look to see Roe's destruction quickly followed by contraception, gay marriage, education, and freedom of religion and speech.

zeuser replies on May 7, 2022:

Yeah, you're right. My prediction is that delegitimizing gay equality comes next, then contraception - a Catholic wet dream trifecta. Buggery by priests will remain legal because of "religious freedom".

I believe it will actually become an earthquake.

glennlab comments on May 6, 2022:

Taco hell.

zeuser replies on May 6, 2022:

Where every burrito Supreme finally goes.

Our county fair has lots to do

zeuser comments on May 6, 2022:

WT actual F!?!

zeuser replies on May 6, 2022:

@St-Sinner When the chips are down, this is your guy. 🥴

Trump says he took widely-mocked cognitive test because people kept calling him stupid! ...

19dacar52 comments on May 5, 2022:

Man... woman.... person.... camera.... TV. There, I aced it! It was really hard toward the end... Those questions were really tough.