Had a very long day today!!! 😴😴😴

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 28, 2024:

I could just see you in that poor couple's bedroom.... Is that wrong?...

Earlier today I experienced a feeling of hopelessness and desperation which is distressing ,to say ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 28, 2024:

I learned long ago that the problem was in me worrying about things I can't control. The solution was pretty simple just stop trying to control the uncontrollable and worry about the things you can control. The rest will always work out in the end somehow sometimes for the better and other times not so much but life is about balance and nobody wins in the end we all die sooner or later just try to enjoy the little things while you still can...

Can someone explain?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 27, 2024:

Lap dance seat?....

All the way through Christmas

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 27, 2024:

At a 150% markup from the regular price....

neighbours

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 27, 2024:

Sadly this is the way Israeli conservatives are...

Could you connect me to the minor burn center, please?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 27, 2024:

The minor burn center is on my front porch right now and waiting to be planted when I finish the siding on my house...

Mistaken identity...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 27, 2024:

The only thing about him that is cocky is his hair...

That wasn't the answer I was expecting

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 27, 2024:

Be a great punishment for these robocall scammers....

It will be fun

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

Must be talking about all those porn stars and hookers he dated.... and in one case married...

Never bored in Florida

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

When real men are in short supply they need a fallback plan I guess...

Republican White House Lawyers Endorse Harris [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

More like 230 of them if you include ex-staffers and high ranking Republicans.... https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2024/8/26/2265841/-More-than-230-former-Bush-McCain-Romney-staffers-sign-letter-endorsing-Harris-Walz-ticket?pm_campaign=trending=sidebar=web

I get no respect

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

OK Rodney....

Monday blahs!!! 😔😔🤣🤣

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

Hell the way my ex is I would teach them how to do a better job....

Tired of the same ole sandwiches?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

Does it have French's mustard on it?....

i agree with that, i wonder if she does....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

And then there are boobs like this we just want to cage up... https://youtu.be/IQdjel9w7N8

i agree with that, i wonder if she does....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 26, 2024:

And then there is the other kind of boob we just want to cage up and ignore... https://youtu.be/IQdjel9w7N8

Definitely bananas

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 25, 2024:

Ahhh the Banana man and his buttboy....

People who know how to pose with sculptures! 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 25, 2024:

I like the one of MarkTwain 3 in Kansas City MO....

Do you have to swear on the Bible in court or will any old book of fantasies do?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 25, 2024:

They should have to swear their oath on the US constitution and if they violate that oath be removed from the bench stripped of their law license and sent to prison...

Too many migrants from California

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 25, 2024:

Nah we don't want those Republicans back they are your problem now...

Seriously. Some nights my dreams are right out of an H.G. Wells novel

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 25, 2024:

Try dreams where you wake up in cold sweats and can't remember...They must be straight out of E. A. Poe or Stephan King....

This nails it!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 25, 2024:

In short a classic bully...

And trump is paying for it! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 25, 2024:

Just imagine if it had been a busboy at one of his country clubs...

BREAKING NEWS !!! A riot in Canada

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

Surprised it didn't say "sorry" at the bottom...

Don't miss the Oscars

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

You mean the Oscar-Meyers don't you?....

Why Do So Many Workers Love Trump?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

Because most of them are nothing but losers... https://youtu.be/woi08EGxHBM

A tale of two conventions and two torn shirts.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

The organ grinder and the monkey are so close to the reality of their campaign I don't see why anyone would vote for them...

Could she possibly have been a worse pick?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

What a shame this isn't real...

A brilliant product launch

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

Trump will buy a shitload of those...

Does it take more courage and work to be good than evil?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

It takes more courage to be good and more work to be evil...

Ow! My head hurts 🤕😂😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

So did Barron ever have a DNA paternity test done?....

I'd call it ballsy, but it's probably better described as ball-less.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 24, 2024:

Win with Darwin....

And it worked !

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 23, 2024:

Until it swings the other way....

Just so you know...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 23, 2024:

All about Trump....

I'd call it ageism.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 23, 2024:

Wayne drowning the country's sorrows....

No doubt about it!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 23, 2024:

There were five Stooges and Sean Penn isn't bald...

No doubt about it!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 23, 2024:

There were five stooges and Sean Penn isn't bald....

I think I'll FREEZE!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 23, 2024:

Dogs that threaten me I run towards so they know I am crazy and will fuck them up.... They get a lot of exercise that way....

JD Vance's Attempt At A Photo-Op Backfires Into A Horribly Awkward Moment At Georgia Donut Shop

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 23, 2024:

"we reserve the right to refuse service to assholes like you!..." The movie Hamburger 1986

Exactly. Who can sleep when someone is wrong?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

I can't sleep anyway so correcting them just gives me something to do...

MeToo has changed everything

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

Thank goodness neither will reproduce...

Financing available. Pay after you make money. Admissions Open!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

About the size of it.... I had one call me again this morning at 7AM trying the Medicare scam so I told him his mama called and wants him to help her on the streets fucking cows.... His reply was to put it mildly obscenely funny..

Not the answer she was looking for...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

Male or female student?...

Truth be told

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

Pretty much anything is safer than what they pass off as "food..."

I am going to find her

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

Too dumb for my taste...

ROME: A man has been detained after throwing a full bottle of Clorox over the Pope, he pleaded ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

You will pay for that and it will be in all large denarius aureus...

What a hypocrite!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 22, 2024:

Hey @michelle666gar is this you with your cats?....

Happy Wednesday!!! 😁😁😁😁😁😁

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

Been waiting one hell of a long time myself.... Could have died of boredom if I had made it my whole life.

Russia Plans to Build Village for US Conservatives Escaping ‘Woke’ Newsweek is reporting that...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

Putin is running short of meat....

He has added a lot of decibels and spittle flecks, though.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

They misspelled Gym....

Be sober coming in and going out

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

Going down?....

That guy back there washing the dishes has two!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

That last one is a real ripoff...

Out of control! Where is the church I am asking

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8ZF_R_j0OY=GarfunkelAndOates

Breaking strain of a Mars bar!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

Still didn't get laid did you?...

Well, you asked....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 21, 2024:

Ballsy post....

Good idea. :)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 20, 2024:

Good but I like mine better...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 20, 2024:

You forgot one....

Really? Is that all you got?!!! [youtu.be]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 20, 2024:

What a fucking putz.... Price controls have been used in the past and were very effective.... I know because I remember them it was when they stopped using them and the anti-monopoly laws that we started having problems... Oh and Dump you are an ugly bastard...

Your guess is as good as mine. ;)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 20, 2024:

Going to end up with a lot of confused people there trying to figure out if those are even the bathrooms...

Today's magic trick...TA-DA!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 20, 2024:

Swims with da fishys

That's pretty much just like everything I post here.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 19, 2024:

Edison's most famous invention was the "Research Laboratory" which employed many talented people he could steal inventions from while paying them set and moderate wages and calling them "assistants" so he got all the profits and credit for their brilliance... One of those was Tesla when he first came to the US...

This seems a logical conclusion

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 19, 2024:

Where is my vomit emoji for these bad puns?....

Hope you all are having a great Sunday night! 😘😘😘

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 18, 2024:

Me: What if I don't like them either Doc?... Therapist: Then fuck them in the ass with a brick...

I remember. Vaguely.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 18, 2024:

Responsible for more weddings than the 12GA shotgun...

I’m going to put this here. Then run. Forgive my warped sense of humor

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 18, 2024:

One bad pun deserves an udder...

FUCKING SLAYER!!!!! 🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 17, 2024:

Depends on which beer.... Samuel Adams has won medals at the Munich Beer Festival.... and others... https://www.realbeer.com/samuel-adams-deschutes-shine-in-germany/

Military vs multipolar. Any read the NYT? Suggest you read something else. [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 17, 2024:

The NYT is OWNED by a big Trump donor....

Peter Kay, a British comedian, on dunking biscuits in tea (a British custom that began in the 19th ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 17, 2024:

Dunking them in tea began so they could eat them without teeth...

and strangely shown to be true.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 17, 2024:

The average Republican can't even spell strategy much less use it....

This will be after the throat punch.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 17, 2024:

The only difference between inlaws and outlaws is that outlaws are wanted....

It takes a special type of Con man, to get rich, without paying taxes, by selling people, an ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 17, 2024:

It would be so nice to see someone hack these fraudsters bank accounts and steal all their money then carefully filter it slowly enough to not attract attention to worthwhile causes...

An oldie but a goodie AN OLD WOMAN WALKED UP AND TIED HER OLD MULE TO THE HITCHING POST.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 16, 2024:

I would have also thanked him for the gun and whiskey....

Just look, they have wings and everything.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 16, 2024:

At the rate Musk has been going he might only make it to a prison in the UK soon...

Disney says man can't sue over wife's death because he agreed to Disney+ terms of service 7 years ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 16, 2024:

I doubt this will fly with the judge.... Signing up for a free trial of an unrelated service?...

I need to go to sleep!!! 🥱🤣🤣🤣

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 16, 2024:

Actually Alfred Nobel died of a stroke.... and I feel very sorry for that dog when the cat strikes back...

It’s been like this all week…

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 16, 2024:

It was a nice pleasant 95 degrees here today...

What's good for the Goose is good for the....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 15, 2024:

We should do that to all MAGAs and other Trump supporters in any case...

It's almost like a code for us oldheads.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 15, 2024:

Who says we are civilized?....

[huffpost.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2024:

Should have added "Because he is a crappy golfer" to that...

50% population loves pizza

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2024:

Pizza porn yum.....

Don't even think about asking her phone number

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2024:

Looks like China to me.... Most of the people there don't understand what they are saying or doing when it comes to clothing. I have seen some pretty weird shit on tee shirts made there...

Show me on the doll where the bullet hit you..

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2024:

I didn't realize they made dolls of monitors these days....

It always pays to read the fine print, and check for spelling.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2024:

I agree with George....

Masturbation is self rape .

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 13, 2024:

"Don't rape yourself let our priests do it for you...." This message brought to you by not only the Mormons but the Catholics and Baptists as well....

Slight misunderstanding...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 13, 2024:

Poor guy just had his reputation ruined.... He should sue.

This is Rachael Gunn, she has a PhD in cultural movement and convinced Australia to pay for her trip...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 12, 2024:

Deservedly so apparently... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VX6MVULmF_I=FOXSPORTSAUSTRALIA

Happy to help out

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 12, 2024:

Ship to: DonOld Trump Mir-A-Largo, Florida I hear he loves dogs...

Trump has the best recall, the very best even if everyone else says it didn't happen that way

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 11, 2024:

This one went down in flames thanks to the news reporting accurately for once...

Sunday morning cuteness

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 11, 2024:

Have a new fixed female we are working to tame in the yard named Midget Gidget because she is small even for a feral.... Anyone want to adopt her and her brother he is already about as tame as any cat I have ever worked with and loves to be held like a baby while having his belly rubbed...

If he only had a... nah.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 10, 2024:

Four he hasn't got a penis either according to Stormy Daniels...

GO KAMALA!!! Polls show Kamala Harris building lead over Trump in 2024 election [aol.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 10, 2024:

We got very lucky and this could have ended badly if she had picked anyone else as a running mate....

More Brain Worms!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 9, 2024:

I am betting the brain worm not only has a higher IQ but is starving to death....

Talk about short sighted

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 9, 2024:

I can't wait until they try to sell this to the people of Floriduh..... You know Pete will be asking them sweetly and publicly on FAUX if they want the money now....

Syrians take back their oil fields. Another Biden win. [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 9, 2024:

Syria has been under Russian control not US.... The Russians were fighting to keep the Syrian Ba'ath Party in power.

Anti-drug agency says US, not China, guilty of doping athletes Golly gee! Who would have thought ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 9, 2024:

I checked the posts of this organization and they all seem to be propaganda that is pro-Iran, Russian or Chinese....

No bone spurs here

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 8, 2024:

He also volunteered....

In some ways you feel sorry for him, but in the end his fame will live on for years.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 8, 2024:

I see a big future for him in the porn industry....

In some ways you feel sorry for him, but in the end his fame will live on for years.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 8, 2024:

I see a big future for him in the porn industry....

In some ways you feel sorry for him, but in the end his fame will live on for years.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 8, 2024:

I see a big future for him in the porn industry....

I have 2 questions.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 7, 2024:

If I remember correctly in Louisa May Alcott's book "Little Woman" the advice went something like a man should be twice the age of the woman minus something like 7 or 10 years... I have dated women both older and younger and to be honest most women my age or older were a disaster because they were stuck in the idea of a man should slave away to bring home money so the wife could stay at home. This always ended in disaster for me and other guys like me because most of those women don't know how to handle the finances for the family and ended up blowing it out their asses like my ex-wife and some ex-girlfriends I had did... Alcott's advice seems pretty reasonable on the face of it as if the man is that much older he has experience and can guide and help a younger woman to a more stable future.