Financial planning Southern style

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 15, 2023:

I can't wait until he files for bankruptcy the paperwork is going to be fun to read....

Better be sorry than safe

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2023:

Has to be a Russian....

It's more common than we think

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2023:

So many of these in the world....

I'll let myself out...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 14, 2023:

Always be careful what you wish for.... You might just get it but not quite in the way you wanted....

What could he do?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 13, 2023:

Fingerprints left at the scene matched those of his left hand....

Just leaving this here

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 13, 2023:

Nothing makes Mormons look sane....

He missed the vacuum cleaner

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 13, 2023:

One way to collect unemployment....

Well... If u don't know...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 12, 2023:

I should call the AA hotline with that one...

My god. Have you been to a gas station lately?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 11, 2023:

The problem with gas is it drives up the price of that ass....

Honey, let's make this work

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 10, 2023:

She is just lucky he didn't pick the egg beater....

Southern parenting starts early

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 10, 2023:

Exit gene pool stage left.....

I live in Texas but don't look at me.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 10, 2023:

Looks to me like he is someone who fucks his sister...

A nice compliment..... almost

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2023:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ODV6mxVVRZk=JohnnyMandelVEVO

Help me understand

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 30, 2023:

The guy just sat there drinking beer and watching sports.... I guess he figured that counted as exercise...

Included with the Taj Mahal tour

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 30, 2023:

Translation.... The Ganges river: A huge stream of feces and elephant piss...

No kiddin yo doll

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2023:

Check out Barbie's new hit single "Radioactive" ...

Hold your retirement plans.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2023:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ww47bR86wSc=Sprouts

I believe it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 20, 2023:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bwc3a1O9lY=chipnus

Now in extra strength

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 25, 2023:

Sounds like a knock out...

Choose wisely

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 24, 2023:

Time machine.... Just think of all the good you could do making sure criminals and political scum like Hitler, Stalin, Trump and so many others die as children...

Interviewer ;- How do you explain the four year gap in your resume Me ;- That's when I went to ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 18, 2023:

That yale accent really helps...

I feel for him, I live in Texas.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 15, 2023:

The reason it is so hard to solve crimes in the South is with Rednecks there are no dental records and the DNA is all the same...

Question of the Day

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 15, 2023:

Bet it was with his sister...

Don't panic now, we're just going camping.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 15, 2023:

Hi Clarke....

She doesn't want much

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 13, 2023:

Almost as funny as what is happening in Florida right now... They lost 100% of their agricultural workers, 80% of their construction workers and most of the trucking industry is refusing to haul loads in or out of the state....

Deny all you want

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 11, 2023:

Thank Gud for THC...

His last words

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 11, 2023:

The only atheist ever charged and convicted of terrorism in the US and it was ecological terrorism.... Funny how many Christians commit far more heinous crimes that should be defined as terrorism for racist and religious reasons who are never called terrorists....

The real judgement day

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 9, 2023:

Oh let me....

Wait for the judge to explain, ok?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 9, 2023:

.......

Great song...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 2, 2023:

Well at least he keeps the audience in stitches....

Gotta love the Scottish accent [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 2, 2023:

Normal behavior for any AI system regardless of your accent... The drone AI being developed is now in simulations attacking the directors because the programing determines that they interfere with the programmed mission...

Oh My! Should I visit again?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 1, 2023:

Looks like one of Trump's golf courses....

DeSantis is going crazier

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 1, 2023:

Tommy Tuberville is trying hard to play Ketchup....

A How to Flirt Lesson

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 1, 2023:

Doin it wrong....

DeSantis wants to make America like Florida.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 1, 2023:

....

Looks like he picked the wrong one. meep meep

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 1, 2023:

Yep that stuff seems to accelerate to near light-speed on the way through....

He is a "born again" Buddhist.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 1, 2023:

If he were he would be looking at a AR-15 not a H&R single shot 12GA....

Phew, hard work...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 1, 2023:

Who keeps peeing in the pool?...

I relate to this.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

No more running for me with my knees...

DeSantis wants to make America like Florida.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

The rot goes deep...

I don't remember the word but it's like pda in our country.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Took her shopping and all she got was those fowls...

Still single? Don't feel so bad

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Must have been before it went to the scammers...

We have a solution for this summer

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

What no nail polish?...

Correct answer.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

If you have to ask they shouldn't sell it to you without adult supervision...

It might take a while

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Blonde alert....

If you believe that then look at this bridge for sale. lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Be careful what you wish for.... you might just get it...

This is totally wrong IMO

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

If only I had done this with my ex my daughter might still be alive today... But if I had I would never have deserved custody of her either...

Create your own happiness

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Redneck Cadillac...

They are doing Wizard of Oz remake

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Is that the one where Dorthy sings "If I Was Only in a Train?..."

It is good to have insurance and it is useless when you need it.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Make them prove beyond any doubt that god exists...

Life intimidates art, I guess.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Hit the coffee right on the head...

What happened? I know you won't believe it.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 31, 2023:

Looks more like Thor to me...

A salesman trained on Fetlife

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 30, 2023:

I bought a tankless water heater and paid 1/3rd the price that a tank type costs. Not only is it small enough to fit under a bathroom sink but it provides an unlimited supply of hot water at a flow rate of 2.59 gals per minute but only draws power when in use.

And the debt limit keeps getting increased every time, the U.S. debt now stands at $31.4 trillion.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 30, 2023:

The stupidity of this post is amazing... We don't have a debt problem what we do have is a revenue problem... If the upper 1/10th of 1% in this country paid their share of taxes we could pay off the debt in less than 10 years and still spend more than we have been on expanding the economy and fixing the environmental issues we have today. The single largest contributers to debt has been the Republican party with Trump creating the most debt of any president in history and doing so in a single term... David Whitehead is a jackass who can't even count to eleven without removing his socks and shoes... So of course as a pundit he feels qualified to comment on economics using the far right-wing QANON talking points...

This is true about Texas, extending Medicare is a Federal power grab.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 30, 2023:

It isn't medicine that is the problem it is the billionaires controlling the for profit medical system that is killing everyone...

Truth in advertising...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 30, 2023:

If only the political system in the country had the same ethics and standards when naming PACS....

Totally, 1000%, politically incorrect [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 30, 2023:

Doesn't even do English well and he thought it would end well?...

As many of you know, i grew up in the swamps of southwest Louisiana, Cajun Country.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 30, 2023:

One of the last areas in this country that lacks any concept of the need for education in this world and so many other states are now trying to outdo them...

A nice idea indeed, I wonder how much they charge.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 30, 2023:

Just ask I am sure you will get a response....

One Ukrainian Jew to another: "Would you share this imported bottle of Scotch with me?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

A smart man would have traded the whiskey for food....

Cut him some slack, it's a tough decision.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

Some women whatever you do even if she tells you to do it you're still wrong...

Discreet shipping they said

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

Now the whole world knows what you do in the bedroom....

Truth in advertising here

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

Hey isn't that Jesus?....

Men get help

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

Crabs?.....

The light turned yellow, just in front of him.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

Nope just a typical Christian asshole ... Nothing to see here officer...

This belongs here. Jason Sudeikis as JC on SNL [m.youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

Tebow is such a jackass he would likely have fallen for someone pulling that gag in the locker room....

Been busy! Hope you all are having a great weekend!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 29, 2023:

So many times I have had to tell people I don't speak their language.... Just before calling them an asshole...

[tiktok.com] Hello world 😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 28, 2023:

That used to be me after a 21 day work week...

What's your guess as to who is going to revive him?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 28, 2023:

If it were me I would have to vote both...

Ken and Barbie were happy, I don't understand

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 28, 2023:

Barbie goes BBC now on pornhub...

You've gotta make yourself at home.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 28, 2023:

You know you might be a redneck when....

What's for dinner tonight, Moonbeam? 😄

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 28, 2023:

I would be more inclined to consider that as baked....

The captain had it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

Does that mean she is frigid?...

He cannot keep secrets

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

Person of experience there....

Your tax dollars not at work

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

Florida or Texas?...

The funding ran out. A LOT of funding is about to run out.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

If you plan to rob a bank you are better making an "after hours withdrawal" by blowing the vault.... less risk and more money... especially if you can get in for the holiday weekend with a plasma torch and hit those safety deposit boxes... just sayin.

Am I the only one who is getting sick and tired of going to a website and having them ask if I'll ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

I have a simple solution to that problem which is opening firefox in private mode and when I am finished it deletes it all...

Honest mistake, Mr. Whiskers.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

Yet one of the smallest and weakest of those countries has nearly completely disarmed and destroyed the economy of the largest one on that map.... Go Ukraine!...

Monster truck owner

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

There are women out there with bigger clits than the penis of guys who drive those trucks...

It's Memorial Day weekend, be safe and smart.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

Be smart.....Always wear gloves and a mask when doing something stupid....

That would be pure dedication on the peeping-tom's part.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

Wait until the next modification when they put in a glass floor....

Been there, done that...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 27, 2023:

Now that hit the nail on the head for me....

Is it convincing enough?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 26, 2023:

A straw?....

Star Wars fans will understand. 😁

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 26, 2023:

Only if the other guys are using white paintballs...

Any guess why?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Died of fear and indigestion just looking at her?....

I like her answer

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Looks like she's hired though...

Parts Unknown - Boris Johnson

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Too stupid to figure out if he wants it to look average size he really needs a microscope....

Simple passions are the best.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Last one would be great for thinning the herd....

In a fuzzy crown with his inbred kisser? Ya think?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Tell it like it is Wanda!...

Nature lovers' choice

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Stoner's bathroom....

How he's off camera

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

He is no competition....

Marriage is really educational! Man, when I was single, I didn't even know there was a wrong way ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Well there is forking and forking around...

I'm leaving now...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

..........

What would you choose?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 25, 2023:

Pretty sure losing my granddaughter wouldn't be a fair trade...

"The Kardashian" by Kohler

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 24, 2023:

For those extra wide loads....

Did you know that before acting in Episode IV: A New Hope that Mark Hamills had never seen a single ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 24, 2023:

I doubt George Lucas saw them either and if he had we might have been spared....

Hear me out, Toilet Taxi!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 24, 2023:

Just another shitty drone...

Listening skills are overstated

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 24, 2023:

Their comments fell on deaf ears....

I see stupid people, and they don't even know they're stupid.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 24, 2023:

I am quite convinced I was kidnapped by an exceptionally retarded alien species for study...

It is true I think

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on May 23, 2023:

Depends on who is doing the feeling....