Why does this not surprise me?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 24, 2021:

Gnusfreak?...Please they are a joke and one of the co-owners is under indictment.... There is more evidence for Spiderman, Sherlock Holmes, Harry Potter and the Pilsbury Doughboy that there is for Jebus Crisp....

The silent spot.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 23, 2021:

Why build a big church when the person you pray to there tells you to pray at home in private?... Matthew 6:5-8

How nauseating! Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 23, 2021:

Yeah we get it....

Something fun to do! 😂😂😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 23, 2021:

Going to have to remember that the next time I need a table at a crowded restaurant...

Hold the mayo

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 23, 2021:

It is also ritualistic cannibalism....

Religion IQ?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 22, 2021:

Had to do a screenshot for the reply sorry...

Prepare for tis holiday season

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 22, 2021:

As well as the real history of your fake religious cult...

I don't know if it will work, but...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2021:

Shouldn't laugh but I have been there a few times in my life...

I don't think the sausage is in the mood. lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2021:

Now that is just plain nasty....

For the ladies

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2021:

Ass crack..... er...ssssssssssssssssssss

WOW! 😂😂😂😂😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2021:

Never had a problem doing that even with a 21 CF side by side... Of course that is one of the reasons by entire body is all fucked up these days.

Yikes try explaining that one

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2021:

Wrong sword....

Just lookin' around.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2021:

Unfortunately that corrupt judge got Rittehouse off but now hopefully the DOJ will have it's innings and the little prick will go to Club Fed for a very long time... Sad part is that judge will probable face no punishment for his part in all this.

No DNA testing required here.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 19, 2021:

McTurtle makes the Clampetts look like rocket scientists...

Poor dog

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 19, 2021:

Karen is just lucky she didn't try that with a cat.....

Spot the cat

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 19, 2021:

Cats are masters at camouflage....

Could be funny at pet store

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 18, 2021:

Better yet a PETA rally....

Amazing resemblance

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 18, 2021:

That last isn't a stuntman he is a C.U.N.T. man....

Yup he won't

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 18, 2021:

....................

It's all in your hands.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 18, 2021:

A love glove...

Great idea! 👍😉😂😈

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 18, 2021:

As long as it is a pot sniffing dog...

Definitely letting it go

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 17, 2021:

Nah toss a smoke marker into the passenger wheel well and watch him bail out at 70MPH....

Love the group

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 17, 2021:

And damned proud of it.....

Were you forced to use Aim toothpaste as a kid because you could open the Colgate or get the Crest ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 17, 2021:

Since they all contain Sodium Fluoride AKA rat poison they should probably be labeled "for external use only..."

Rittenhouse Humor:

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Pathetically the way the judge has shown partiality in this case he should be disbarred and share a cell with Rittenhouse for the rest of his own life...

Used to be good at it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Just a masturbater?....

A bad habit

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

So that is what the shiny balls are for...

Smart kid! Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Couldn't just hand in a piece of dog shit?....

Hurts just thinking about it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Ironed out the kinks at least I hope....

Ah, those days....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Worth more than a couple splinters for that view....

Yes time to face reality

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

If that doesn't win the war on Christmas nothing will...

We all know that

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 16, 2021:

..................

Limited edition only

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 15, 2021:

Maybe they need a name change to "Not so Durex..."

Yep!!!! 😂😂😂😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 14, 2021:

The game that fries more brain cells than meth....

Great idea for next snowstorm

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 14, 2021:

With burst open cans of frozen beer....

All too true

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 14, 2021:

1/3 of of the population of the country would...

Economy of movement, or more like triangle inequality in action? 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 14, 2021:

People love to hate innovators....

Thailand Funny Commercial [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 14, 2021:

Does it work on shitty neighbors?...

Well that's life

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 14, 2021:

Normal is what the average person out there running around is.... Since that is normal I don't want to be...

Feels like that

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 13, 2021:

I am somewhat fortunate and have a better than average income. This would be funny if it weren't so true for so many people I know.

More from FFRF (2013).

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 13, 2021:

And yet available evidence seems to contradict the first meme....

Perhaps we should have a group for the dumbest crooks [wcjb.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 13, 2021:

The group already exists it is called the Republican party....

No kidding they think that

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 13, 2021:

In my younger days I had a few who actually did like me... Some of them even bought me drinks and some spent the night without me paying them unlike so many other guys who dated strippers.

Funny but true

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 13, 2021:

Should have gone with "Obi-Two Kenobi..."

Shut up already! Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 12, 2021:

Kind of depends if you are into overtime pay already or not....

An ultimate zero-energy fridge. 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 12, 2021:

More of a freezer isn't it?...

Anti-vaxxers

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 12, 2021:

Sent that last one to a couple people and am waiting for the replies...

View from a voyeur's perspective.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 12, 2021:

"Looks like a penis only really tiny..."

It's Friday here therefore it IS time for some fun. First cab off the rank, Feline Horror....LOL.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2021:

....................

You KNOW you are REALLY in the shit when you get this message....LOL.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2021:

Prayers never work....

What can one say to this.....?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2021:

Well at least he knows how to stuff the pussy...

And a thought for the day on how to keep your relationship in balance....LOL

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2021:

Shows how much weight she carries in his life...

Definitely a quiet holiday

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2021:

Or the cherry flavored Melatonin one bottle of those will knock them out for the weekend...

Never wear that shirt

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2021:

Promises promises....

For Dune fans ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2021:

Chani is that you?...

This!!! 😂😂😂😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2021:

As Jesus once said.... "Nailed it..."

Vegans won' t like this

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2021:

The steaks were high so he had to kill it...

That is his secret

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2021:

Actually they would have to use dog shit...

Yup Kermit lunch

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2021:

Yeah Kermit he has seen what you eat too.... Imagine a frog who eats raw pork...

I bet nobody warned then about this part of the gig until it was too late.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2021:

Mt. Keistermore...

I guess Winter is coming. 😂🤣

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

Real problem is when spring arrives and they start to shed .... people coughing up hairballs everywhere...

That's what I was thinking! Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

Ahhh yes a coke and a smile....

Dad's English lessons on how to use the F-word.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

Jack it back up the fucking car is on my foot...

Ya think, just maybe?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

I would have to be shitfaced to stay on a job like that...

Am not going in there

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

Well it looks as if somebody has no sense of fun or adventure...

Talk about commitment

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

I hear evangelicals have the same problem...

The same thing

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

....................

They're after me, I know it!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

Why complain about those two being after you?... At least for now...

I can't believe it either! Lol!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

They have the same signs in India...

Some guys

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2021:

That wasn't me I was elsewhere playing poker that day...

Yes they are

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2021:

..............

Man announces he will quit drinking by 2050. [theshovel.com.au]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2021:

Same approach politicians have towards green energy and reducing pollution.... By the time anything gets done we will be dead anyway so why bother...

Maybe we need to make stuff here in America.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 5, 2021:

That would require big corporations to create good paying American jobs....

Me too.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 5, 2021:

That is what COVID is for... to cull the herd... Two years back they lowered the IQ average here in the US to 99 from 100 and today it is probably back up to 102 at least...

IRONY India is celebrating its biggest annual festival called "Diwali" and today is the most ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2021:

I bet those temples of hers are pretty wealthy though.... Kind of like the ones here who claim to follow the dead man on a stick who supposedly preached the joys of poverty...

I recently heard about this young adult novel in which Schrodinger's cat and Pavlov's dog team up ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2021:

Was the title "All Boxed Up and Somewhere to Go?"

any aussies here to confirm this?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 3, 2021:

Considering how much of that crap the last guy scarfed down on a daily basis and from the look of his droopy drawers he likely shat himself on an hourly basis and was wearing a double layer of Depends....

Meanwhile in Glasgow... (Journal de Quebec)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 3, 2021:

This is exactly the kind of bullshit behavior by the DNC's corporate backed Reagan Republicans that loses elections....

Little Benny was very sick, and the doctors had given up hope.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 3, 2021:

........................

okay that is funny.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

When the stuff is sitting there forever it is bound to take on a life of its own....

Early Thanksgiving joke

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

Just trying to fatten it up first....

Not a stork delivery.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

And that is how you got your name OG

Poor Dave, what can he do?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

https://youtu.be/4yXdbXl-lno

Warning! A teeeeeerrible dad joke! 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

That should have been 0Mg.... 0mg is zero milligrams.....

Biden ended his speech this way . . .

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

Fucking coward sucking up to his big donors Goldman Sachs and Blackstone the two largest business partners of Koch Industries in oil pipelines...

Santa upset the turkey

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

Butterball calling him fat boy.... LMAO...

How to check out the weather forecast at a Grocery Store....LOL.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

Low hanging produce that will make your eyes and mouth water at the same time...

Since most of you live in the Northern Hemisphere, this one is just for you....LOL.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2021:

Hey it's Frosty the snow bitch....

The state of education today

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

The need for these labels has been around a long time now. Back when microwave ovens were first introduced a woman sued one of the manufacturers because she put her poodle into one to dry it after giving it a bath thinking it was safe because "after all they cooked without heat....."

It’s Science. 😬

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

Poppin fresh Dough oh boy!

Too much Halloween celebration

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

Think I have a case of food poisoning right now so my asshole can definitely relate to this....

Sign language interpreter gets straight to the point.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

Because......

When she asks you to spice things up tonight

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

It could always be worse but I am not sure how.... Except maybe that horrid "Texas Chili" mix they used to sell in the stores a while back that was mostly Cayenne pepper...

A "Newbie Carer" has just started her first shift at the local Nursing Home and it's the Evening ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

Only if the nurse climbs on top and pins me down until the Viagra wears off....

Just so U know!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

I love the summer when it warms up enough that my joints stop aching...

Candy judgment.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2021:

And then you have the prankster....

Ok, ok, one more Halloween-themed gag.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2021:

Should have tried a digital video camera instead....

'Surprise Me' sounds rather ominous....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2021:

Spill his guts.....

That is evil

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2021:

I get letters about once every three months and phones calls once a week at least and I don't even own a fucking car....

Halloween tale

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2021:

Tell the wife and kids.... I bet they all shit themselves...