It's the 8th of f-ing Christmas! May the force be with you, young Jesus. 😂

zeuser comments on Dec 9, 2021:

Myrhh I have.

Have a Holly Jolly Christmas

zeuser comments on Dec 9, 2021:

Good selection, Glenn. And a timely reminder that batteries are always a thoughtful gift that keeps on giving. ;)

New German chancellor Olaf Scholz has no religious affiliation and omitted the phrase "so help me ...

zeuser comments on Dec 9, 2021:

I like this guy already.

lol, I don't know, I was bored and Photoshop was open.

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

I shy away from the crusty ones and concentrate on the creamier varieties. ;)

I think this Imam's brother is a Catholic priest

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

Not cool, you prick.

The very worst of them all……

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

Yeah, I'd like 20 stamps...oh, wait... I thought I was in the post office there for a minute. ;)

An assembly of church messages brought to you by your friendly FFRF community.

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

I'd go see the ladies who cast off clothing of every kind. In the church basement, no less.

My tree is up. Fresh and has a nice scent. Not going to decorate at all. Love it as is.

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

I'm down for your advent calendar, Bob.

Has this ever been wrong?

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

I can't speak for the other 9, but yeah.

Talk about naughty....

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

*ahem* Did you see that I have a whitish beard?

This would be a great addition to all church lobbies especially the more conservative ones.

zeuser comments on Dec 8, 2021:

Isn't this the technique Edgar G Robinson used to die in Soylent Green? Spoiler alert: soylent green is people!

A question for the geeky among us.

zeuser comments on Dec 7, 2021:

I think that would make flogging the dolphin qualify as a gateway drug.

Jesse Dollemore - DOJ Says it's Prepared to Prosecute Steve Bannon IN A SINGLE DAY!!! ...

zeuser comments on Dec 7, 2021:

Good. I'd be in favor of loading up his sentence to include hard labor and the requirement that he takes a shower, at least once. ;)

Christmas cookies....

zeuser comments on Dec 7, 2021:

Santa is probably just a little bit more careful now that we are in the golden age of edibles.

Am I the only one who thinks navy blue is a female plot against men? It’s black

zeuser comments on Dec 7, 2021:

I was always a fan of cerulean blue.

Reporter buries Matt Gaetz, Marjorie Taylor Greene with ONE SIMPLE question [youtube.

zeuser comments on Dec 7, 2021:

I continue to hold out hope that these traitors will face justice one day, or at the very least face the prospect of having to address their treason in a court of law.

Maybe they have something

zeuser comments on Dec 7, 2021:

Gotta go with the science. ;)

A woman joins a country club, and when she hears some guys talking about their golf round, she says,...

zeuser comments on Dec 6, 2021:

Ok, I legitimately laughed out loud!

CNN - Trump mocks top general at his Florida resort [youtube.com]

zeuser comments on Dec 6, 2021:

Amazing how this piece of shit is always the smartest guy and the hero in his own stories. The thing I get a kick out of is that he thinks he's fooling everybody. The thing that makes him dangerous is that he actually is fooling so many. Fuckwit.

Guys, you think it worth talking the chance?

zeuser comments on Dec 5, 2021:

That's a dirty trick. A life lesson for the young woman and probably a deviated septum for da Vinci.

I now want a box of these for our tree.

zeuser comments on Dec 4, 2021:

Technically, if you have a tree, it should say "pagan". But I'll let it slide just this one time. ;)

Remember college days?

zeuser comments on Dec 4, 2021:

It was more of an informal arrangement. We had to discontinue it due to the high level of lying and exaggeration.

Not my Christmas and no kids on lap

zeuser comments on Dec 3, 2021:

The real santa would kill you on sight.

Ladies and Gentlemen, We have a new 2021 photography winner.

zeuser comments on Dec 3, 2021:

That falls into the category of funny/not funny. Also, that guy's ass...

Oh, the horror!

zeuser comments on Dec 3, 2021:

All the same dough, bro.

Two older couples are hanging out together.

zeuser comments on Dec 3, 2021:

Sometimes all you need is a non-judgmental prompt.

Big spoiler alert

zeuser comments on Dec 2, 2021:

Alternate timelines are all the rage currently. This looks like Earth 32.

More FFRF stuff

zeuser comments on Dec 2, 2021:

Good stuff, JP. ;)

My thoughts exactly

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

It took this poor bastard that long to figure it out?

And biscuit tins

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

Yeah. Don't get me started on reusing plastic food containers.

Another FFRF posting. This time it includes another nutball religious group.

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

Those are fantastic. :)

Undisputable!

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

Fuck that! No really, good fucking plan.

Cosmic foreplay.

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

First step, make a pass.

10/10 would sit again

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

Nice wood.

Pope Francis, Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and a little boy are crossing the Atlantic on an airplane ...

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

An oldie but goodie. The people in the joke change with the years, but the gag remains the same. ;)

Warning for the season

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

At least I can still drink. Without the prime, though, I get that.

Fund-duh-mentalist history channel....

zeuser comments on Dec 1, 2021:

Actually, the tree is a pagan celebration of yule. But the Santa hats evoke a christian saint, Saint Nicholas of Myra. So yeah, that's an anachronism. Not that there aren't plenty of those in the Flintstones.

The mindset of the Trumpanzee.

zeuser comments on Nov 30, 2021:

Yeah, there isn't any such thing as a simple explanation when the obvious answer makes you squirm.

Why I liked comics so much

zeuser comments on Nov 30, 2021:

What comic was that? I missed it completely!

Pretty much the case!

zeuser comments on Nov 29, 2021:

This reminds me, I should really get a dog. I can't right now, but maybe soon.

Cyber Monday Folks!

zeuser comments on Nov 29, 2021:

Good real estate agents tell you to ask for a higher price for your home than you expect. Either (A) you find someone willing to pay the price, or (B) you lower the price and seal the deal, because people like to think they are saving money. Good strategy for selling anything, it works!

Happy Sunday!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂

zeuser comments on Nov 28, 2021:

Good ones, MG1.

Lucky chappy.

zeuser comments on Nov 28, 2021:

Maybe he had a Groupon. I can understand that.

My kind of bumper sticker

zeuser comments on Nov 28, 2021:

I have two of them. But they aren't children anymore.

Ain't this a fact?

zeuser comments on Nov 28, 2021:

Nah, I'm good with Monday. That's when I go grocery shopping because the stores and parking lots are emptier. Retirement can be a blessing: work hard, save your money, let compound interest work in your favor. ;)

Sanitary tip of the day...

zeuser comments on Nov 28, 2021:

Important health tip.

Curiosity..........😂😂😂😂

zeuser comments on Nov 28, 2021:

Three way!

Uhm.

zeuser comments on Nov 27, 2021:

I can't even...

I'd give the kid an "A" for creativity...

zeuser comments on Nov 26, 2021:

Teacher should be more careful when wording assignments. I suggest an intensive review of numerous "little Johnny" jokes to more easily avoid the obvious verbal traps. LOL

Although this probably didn’t happen ‘it’s not that far fetched that it couldn’t have ...

zeuser comments on Nov 26, 2021:

The only turkeys I'm worried about are the ones that voted for him.

Imagine that!!!

zeuser comments on Nov 26, 2021:

Religious hypocrites, you can't get away from 'em.

Suspicious sounding weather forecast.

zeuser comments on Nov 24, 2021:

Oh relax. Internal temp will be closer to 165.

Of course it would come to this

zeuser comments on Nov 24, 2021:

Of course.

If ya don't sin ya can't be saved!

zeuser comments on Nov 24, 2021:

Big time buzzkill.

All menus these days [youtube.com]

zeuser comments on Nov 24, 2021:

You know, avocado is the one food that I am allergic to, and you're right, they put it on everything. WTF eats avocado on toast, FFS?

OOOpps...wrong paper....

zeuser comments on Nov 24, 2021:

I dunno, this seems like a....perky holiday message. Yeah, perky. ;)

Why I laugh when a Republican, a TEA Partier or a Libertarian tries to tell me they aren't a ...

zeuser comments on Nov 23, 2021:

All about heritage? A history of enslavement, genocide, garden variety racism, and snarling bigotry isn't a "heritage", it's a rap sheet.

A DETERRENT FOR FRIVOLOUS LAWSUITS A federal judge has ordered two Colorado lawyers who filed a ...

zeuser comments on Nov 23, 2021:

Oh hell yeah. I always wondered why the imbeciles who sue like this were never held accountable for their ridiculous time wasting bullshit. I don't see any mention of their clients. I guess they will walk on this because the lawyers were the ones who should have known better. Although I'd love to see something done about those guys too. A small sliver of good news in an otherwise shitty week.

Wife comes home from work.

zeuser comments on Nov 23, 2021:

She made the right choice here.

Unfortunately he has succeeded to a large extent.

zeuser comments on Nov 23, 2021:

Decades of underfunding education by a certain elephantine political party and their concomitant commitment to religion, racism, and toxic masculinity have all played a big part. This moronic jerkoff was just the cherry on top, or the orange I guess.

Something fun to do! 😂😂😂

zeuser comments on Nov 23, 2021:

Busted!

Nice shirt...

zeuser comments on Nov 22, 2021:

Fabulous fucking idea, right?

I can't believe they forgot McConnell

zeuser comments on Nov 22, 2021:

I'll have to take your word for it, but it makes sense to me.

Faux news is a cancer in this country, and as all cancerous pustules it's starting to rot from ...

zeuser comments on Nov 22, 2021:

Money can buy souls, that's been proven time and again. The surprising thing, when you find out what the numbers actually are, is how little people will accept in exchange for their integrity. Good for the two that got out, but what the fuck took you so long?

This read is a great reporting piece by Rolling Stone, enlightening and infuriating at the same ...

zeuser comments on Nov 22, 2021:

I don't trust rich people, as a rule. I'm willing to change my opinion on a case by case basis, but the default is -- I don't trust 'em.

“Life is too short to waste your time on people who don’t respect, appreciate, and value ...

zeuser comments on Nov 22, 2021:

Yeah. Let's be friends and never see each other again.

This tree is getting revenge for all the trees that have been peed on.

zeuser comments on Nov 21, 2021:

Oh FFS. They like it, and don't let them bullshit you that they don't. ;)

Do you accept this mission? Then go.

zeuser comments on Nov 21, 2021:

I dunno, kind of a dick move.

It may blow in their faces but these motherfuckers are impervious to facts. [cnn.com]

zeuser comments on Nov 21, 2021:

Republicans demonstrate more projection than a chain of 12-screen movie theaters.

Yes that's right

zeuser comments on Nov 20, 2021:

I remember a bar in Fells Point in Baltimore named that, "And the Horse You Rode In On". Been decades since I've been there, it may be gone now. It was a short walk from there to Bertha's Mussels.

Cheerful news from PEW Research... [pewforum.org]

zeuser comments on Nov 20, 2021:

I bet a strip club would boost attendance. I like to think outside the box, ya know?

Biologists Confirm: Ted Cruz is a Sentient Crotch Cyst - The Political Garbage Chute

zeuser comments on Nov 20, 2021:

He is a TOOMAH!

WOW! 😂😂😂😂😂

zeuser comments on Nov 20, 2021:

Oooo. That's cold.

Yeah, I was wondering that, too...

zeuser comments on Nov 20, 2021:

Socks may divorce, but in too many cases one of them is guilty of stocking.

😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🙄😂🤣

zeuser comments on Nov 20, 2021:

Guesses on his nickname? I'll say "white dick".

Well this is frivolously curious, indeed.

zeuser comments on Nov 19, 2021:

Do fries cum with that? *innocent look*

It is a full beaver moon NASA might need to send a razor into space to trim it up lol.

zeuser comments on Nov 19, 2021:

If it was a full beaver moon, wouldn't some be sticking out the sides during the eclipse?

Ok, just ignore the reference to xtian holiday-

zeuser comments on Nov 19, 2021:

Hey, I LIKE this meaning.

How's that fair?.. Lol

zeuser comments on Nov 18, 2021:

Suppose I paint eyes on lefty, would that count? 😜

Didn't stay in Vegas lol

zeuser comments on Nov 18, 2021:

Snake eyes!

MAGA translated...

zeuser comments on Nov 18, 2021:

Looks like you're finally gonna drop some weight choking down prison food. Asswipe.

Could be funny at pet store

zeuser comments on Nov 18, 2021:

I call bullshit. Real hamsters are gluten free.

Glenn Kirschner - Steve Bannon's Ridiculous Court Performance Exposed [youtube.com]

zeuser comments on Nov 18, 2021:

Proof positive you don't need to be smart or look good to be a wildly successful criminal racist traitor. He plays to his audience, and among that mangy disgusting pack of prolapsed assholes, his star burns the brightest. Dickwad.

Great idea! 👍😉😂😈

zeuser comments on Nov 18, 2021:

Cute idea in theory.

It's all in your hands.

zeuser comments on Nov 18, 2021:

"I can't put my finger on it, hon" is no longer a credible excuse.

MSNBC - 'QAnon Shaman' Jacob Chansley Sentenced To 41 Months In Prison [youtube.com]

zeuser comments on Nov 17, 2021:

Convicted hornheaded insurrectionist says what? 🤣🤣🤣

God was trolled. Notice the comment... lmfao

zeuser comments on Nov 17, 2021:

Nailed it!

The amazing thing is her reading

zeuser comments on Nov 17, 2021:

Looks like she got to the end and is disappointed because there weren't any pictures of Louie Gohmert.

We all know that

zeuser comments on Nov 17, 2021:

Probably had to slip a fin to cuzzin Zeke.

A long drive

zeuser comments on Nov 17, 2021:

Depends how talented the, um, singer is.

Don Jr: "If Joe's So Good at Finishing What Daddy Couldn't, Why Can't He Make Ivanka Cum?"

zeuser comments on Nov 17, 2021:

That sews it up for me. LOL

When somebody tells me "I am so going to hell for that..." I just show them this....

zeuser comments on Nov 16, 2021:

I wanna stay there with all my buddies.

The Young Turks - Trump Thrown Under The Bus By Chris Christie [youtube.com]

zeuser comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Gee, I wonder what took him so long.

New cup design....

zeuser comments on Nov 16, 2021:

I like it.

Warden Denies MTG Conjugal Visit With January 6th Attackers, Citing Illegality of Horse Fucking

zeuser comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Nope, nope, not even with somebody else's dick.

Any takers?

zeuser comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Awww.

Hurts just thinking about it

zeuser comments on Nov 16, 2021:

Oh man, read the manual dude.

Now recruiting....

zeuser comments on Nov 16, 2021:

I'm in!

Way more plausible

zeuser comments on Nov 15, 2021:

Sometimes it's hard to detect unless you look closely.

“Think for yourself, or others will think for you without thinking of you.

zeuser comments on Nov 14, 2021:

When two people agree on everything, you can be sure that one of them is doing all of the thinking.